In “Twerkin’ & Tweezin’,” The Black Lincoln Collective breaks down one of the most chaotic comedy nights ever witnessed. A stubborn couple hijacks the seating chart, German metal fans add unexpected flavor, and an MC delivers a set so long it bends time. But nothing tops the comic who keeps pulling out tweezers like it’s performance art. It’s unplanned, unhinged, and unintentionally hilarious — the kind of disaster that only gets funnier in hindsight.
In “Twerkin’ & Tweezin’,” The Black Lincoln Collective breaks down one of the most chaotic comedy nights ever witnessed. A stubborn couple hijacks the seating chart, German metal fans add unexpected flavor, and an MC delivers a set so long it bends time. But nothing tops the comic who keeps pulling out tweezers like it’s performance art. It’s unplanned, unhinged, and unintentionally hilarious — the kind of disaster that only gets funnier in hindsight.
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Fans in your seat belt, it's going to be a bumpy night suit.
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A life, a life, it's a life!
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Welcome to the Black Lincoln Collective Podcast.
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Oh, it's gonna be fun!
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We can see it late, swap the mail to the store in the morning.
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I'll make it fast!
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With your most harder.
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Featuring the seltries sounds of Fred and also Ellie on the board.
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Let's go already!
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And now let's start the show.
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Welcome welcome!
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Go ahead, Fred!
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You weren't saying anything, so I was like, "I swear to you, I swear to you, I swear to you!"
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You have to wait for the beat!
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There's a beat you wait on every time.
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You have rhythm, you should know these things.
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Nothing.
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I was coming in from the screen, and now I was like, "Maybe he kicked out, I'll just eat some."
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No, I'm here.
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We get over it, Fred.
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Okay, get that seedman number, Nick, that flomin'nest!
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Go ahead, man.
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No, I insist.
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Welcome, welcome, welcome!
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Once again ladies and gentlemen to the other episode, any other episode?
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2014th episode of the Black Lincoln Collective Podcast.
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That's all I said it correctly.
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And I'm your guy, Freddie, the co-host with the...
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No host, I guess, and...
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With the nightbeat.
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The nightbeat!
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Get off of this.
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Get off of this.
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Get off of this.
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Get off of this.
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Get off of this.
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Get off of this.
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Pro-lap something.
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He's the night cheesed by nightbeat.
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It's a snack barger.
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Hey, you cheesed my name.
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Well Fred, thanks for having me on your show.
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No, no.
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Allans here too.
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Yeah, that's me.
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How did he change our names?
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Anyway, welcome to the show ladies and gentlemen.
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We're so glad you joined us for this, our Thanksgiving episode.
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Terky time ladies and gentlemen.
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Terky.
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And nothing says turkey more than going and spending your Friday night
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at an amateur comedy show.
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This is what I do.
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As a bowl of a sucker.
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Yes, there's one born every minute.
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And I was born.
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Yeah.
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Where does the word the arts?
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I did.
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Well, no.
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So, you know, I said, you know what?
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I'm going out and we went to a place and I was, they were like comedy and I was like, yeah, comedy is funny.
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So I thought,
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was that open mic?
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No.
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No, yeah.
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No, honestly, Fred, if it had been an open mic, I would have gone up.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, fucking bad.
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I know no matter what I said, it would have gotten more laughs than all of the other people.
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If I didn't just stood up there and farted, made fart noises for me.
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There would have gotten better response from the crowd.
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Well, the film asked what's nominated for it.
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Right.
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It's got its face.
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Yeah.
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So I went to, and I can call it, it's not their fault.
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They didn't do anything wrong.
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Right.
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To a little place called the voodoo brewing company in the lovely city of Fountain in South Carolina, which is just a road from our
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community.
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You're not me didn't do that.
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No, I don't know what did, but it wasn't your night meat.
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He's looking around too.
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I know like he had a button.
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President, can I, did I do something?
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You have it before you're not now.
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He's ready to board now too.
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Going into it, I should have known because tickets were not very expensive.
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They were, I think, two tickets was like 40 bucks, right?
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Which is not, I mean, not inexpensive, right?
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Like, you know, for a shitty company, I would say $20 you would think you're getting like a,
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yeah, a low tier professional.
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You could, because I know, I know that place, right?
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That's the one they got the big outsour outdoor patio.
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They do.
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Right.
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Well, you should have just bought a six bag and set it.
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Well, here's the thing, right?
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Funnily enough, they had a private room for the con.
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Oh, really.
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Right.
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And so, and I didn't even know I'd never been there.
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Yeah, yeah.
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So I honestly, outside of the company, which was great, the show, the food, well, my food was
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excellent.
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And I should have known, yeah, that it was going to be just no.
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Now, the company food was excellent.
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She got great stuff.
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I got it.
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She got better taste of me except for a minute apparently.
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But so we show up.
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We're like, you know, we're here.
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It's great.
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You know, got a $7 beer, $10 beer, whatever.
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And like, okay.
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And so they're like, oh, well, you know, it's down in our private room.
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And I'm like, oh, hey, hey, private room party time.
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Yeah.
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The private room was small.
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And that's okay.
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Is a small.
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It was an intimate gathering, if you will, Fred.
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But we sat down.
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They're like, you're, they preselected tables for everybody.
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What did, okay, just so I have an understanding of the room.
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What would you say to capacity?
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Um, four people.
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Not including the comedians.
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No, there was probably a thing.
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There was probably like 50 people in there.
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That would probably be okay.
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Something like that.
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Yeah, some of these.
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I wouldn't say more than 50.
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And I wouldn't see.
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I was at a table of six.
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Probably right now.
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We'll say 50 to 60.
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Were they all there?
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Like, yeah, it was full.
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Yeah, okay.
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The room was full.
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Yeah.
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And so that was the first of our many obstacles of the evening.
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Yeah.
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So the first, we get there.
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And the guy is like, well, we've preceded you at table four.
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Yeah.
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And I was like, great.
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No problem.
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Now, Fred, for the radio listeners at home, who can't see me, even though they wish they
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could.
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And they really would be disappointed if they did.
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I am all of almost six and a half feet tall.
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Yeah, big man.
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I'm a big fellow with a big back as the kids say, which means that I am back.
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We'll get to, we'll get to some weight loss tips later in the show.
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But for now, so I get there, we get there and I're like, table four.
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And I was like, cool, table four.
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Well, at least I can sit with my back to the wall.
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However, it is a high top table, one of two.
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And everyone then there's like 20 people in a low top table behind it.
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So stage, my table, high top table, then low top tables.
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So not a great start.
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I felt bad.
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I'm like, I would, I would normally sit in the back of anything we go to like that.
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Also, I hate high top tables.
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But I normally sit in the back out of an abundance of courtesy to everyone else in the room.
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Because I'm not already through 40 at this thing.
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Hey, man, you've got to come in there like a good fellow.
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I threw 80 something in there, full shit food and drinks.
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You got to tip the bot tip, $100.
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He wasn't the boy.
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I was cold.
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I think he was like, the guy should have known by seeing.
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Well, he frees out everybody.
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That's the thing is he didn't even, he blind sat everybody, right?
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So we get there, we sit down.
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There's a lovely two other couples who are sitting with us and they say, hey, we aren't supposed to be at this table.
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And I said, okay, well, fuck you both.
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And they're like, no, no, no, no, it's not that we don't want to be at this table.
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We're supposed to.
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Yeah, they're like, no, that we don't want to be at this table.
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We were just preceded at table number two, which is the table directly in front of us, which is a low top.
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And the people who are sitting there refused to get up.
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And I was like, oh, it's going to be a night.
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It's going to be a night.
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This before anything started.
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So I was like, what do you mean they're refusing it up?
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And she's like, well, the guy who who sat everybody, explain the situation to them.
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And they just said, no, we're not going to get up.
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And so the guy was kind of powerless against that level of care and stuff.
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It was a total, it was totally a care.
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You can see it.
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You can see it.
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And so no, she was like, no, we're not going to get up.
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We picked our seats.
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And he's like, but you just not your seat.
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And he's like, well, we picked it.
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And so at one point, the level of white, the black ain't on his own.
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Oh, I couldn't even do that.
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I can't do that either.
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Like, I'm not going to be able to do that.
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I'm not going to be able to do that.
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I can't do that.
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I can't do that either.
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Like, I can never do this.
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It's just air.
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Yeah.
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That's just like, oh, God.
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You know, I tell the comment.
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If you had a good comment, you'd go and tell the comment, hey, just pick up those seats.
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Oh, yeah.
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They didn't have to worry about that.
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Eat them up.
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That wasn't on the menu for sure.
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So, I know.
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I don't want to work on the seat.
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We'll get to that.
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Don't you worry about that, Fred?
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Yeah.
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The proud work was a level that's never been seen.
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I'm not going to tell you which way.
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So, we get, so finally, a few minutes before the show starts, if people are settling in and
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everything, and the guy comes out and says, hey, listen, there's been some issues with the seating
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chart.
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I'm going to move everyone right now.
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Like, this is not an option.
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You will be moved if you are not at your proper seat.
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And so, he starts calling out people's names like Stevens, Parker, whatever, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
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We're already at the right seat, right?
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Yeah.
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So, I'm like, okay, and we've already, now we've spoken to these people.
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They're like older, you know, they're nice enough.
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They're like having fun.
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You know, they get, they get, I go to get another round of drinks.
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When I get back, they're like, oh, you never believe the stuff that we've been talking about you while you were gone.
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You're never going to believe what I'm about to say to you.
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And they were like, oh, my God, you know, so, and so like, they're like, okay, sorry, we have to move.
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We, they figured it out.
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They moved them to the table where they were supposed to be.
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They're rightful.
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Right table.
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They're the white table.
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I mean, the right table.
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And they, then, then this is where I was like, you know what?
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Things are looking up already before the show even starts things are starting to look up.
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Yeah.
250
00:11:43,140 --> 00:11:48,140
Because the people who were in front who refused to move were not supposed to be sitting in our table at all.
251
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:51,140
They are directly behind me.
252
00:11:51,140 --> 00:11:54,140
And so then I was like, I'm just spread out.
253
00:11:54,140 --> 00:11:58,140
But I just realized that this isn't so bad.
254
00:11:58,140 --> 00:12:00,140
I got to open up my back.
255
00:12:00,140 --> 00:12:01,140
Oh, yeah.
256
00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:05,140
I was in a seat.
257
00:12:05,140 --> 00:12:07,140
I did actually have to stretch my back a lot.
258
00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:09,140
It was very uncomfortable for three hours.
259
00:12:09,140 --> 00:12:12,140
Yeah, that's a lot of table.
260
00:12:12,140 --> 00:12:13,140
Terrible.
261
00:12:13,140 --> 00:12:15,140
So they finally moved.
262
00:12:15,140 --> 00:12:17,140
You know, they're not happy about it, but who fucking cares?
263
00:12:17,140 --> 00:12:18,140
Yeah, but they're not.
264
00:12:18,140 --> 00:12:19,140
No one cares about them.
265
00:12:19,140 --> 00:12:26,140
And then we are seated with instead a lovely pair of German folks, two pair of German two
266
00:12:26,140 --> 00:12:28,140
couples of German descent.
267
00:12:28,140 --> 00:12:29,140
Nice, very nice people.
268
00:12:29,140 --> 00:12:32,140
You should have felt comfortable, real comfortable.
269
00:12:32,140 --> 00:12:33,140
And Google.
270
00:12:33,140 --> 00:12:35,140
That's right.
271
00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:41,140
Well, so the company I was with is like, you said, seek height.
272
00:12:41,140 --> 00:12:48,140
This game like a one figure like, yeah, just one figure.
273
00:12:48,140 --> 00:12:51,140
Yeah, that's the diamond.
274
00:12:51,140 --> 00:12:53,140
I was like, wait, they're Russian.
275
00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,140
Oh, fuck.
276
00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:55,140
Good.
277
00:12:55,140 --> 00:12:56,140
So you have three like this.
278
00:12:56,140 --> 00:12:57,140
Yeah, the right three.
279
00:12:57,140 --> 00:12:58,140
Yeah.
280
00:12:58,140 --> 00:12:59,140
Anyway.
281
00:12:59,140 --> 00:13:05,140
So, so the other people sit down and they're like, hi, nice to meet you.
282
00:13:05,140 --> 00:13:07,140
And I'm like, is this the me?
283
00:13:07,140 --> 00:13:10,140
That's not German, but it's okay.
284
00:13:10,140 --> 00:13:14,140
And so they're very nice, you know, very nice people.
285
00:13:14,140 --> 00:13:19,140
And like, even though they were older, like all of them had like metal shirts on, like, you know,
286
00:13:19,140 --> 00:13:20,140
they're German people.
287
00:13:20,140 --> 00:13:22,140
So they like, fuck the industrial level.
288
00:13:22,140 --> 00:13:23,140
Yeah.
289
00:13:23,140 --> 00:13:24,140
Yeah.
290
00:13:24,140 --> 00:13:27,140
And there was all like, like the old people, you know, bands and then shit, like, oh, yeah.
291
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:31,140
And I was like, these are like, these are like, there's like, wow.
292
00:13:31,140 --> 00:13:35,140
Oh, and these people were like, they were probably armed like my, so like in their mid 40s.
293
00:13:35,140 --> 00:13:39,140
But they were just, the lady had like, I couldn't even read it because it was a German.
294
00:13:39,140 --> 00:13:43,140
But it basically said like demon pussy fucker or something.
295
00:13:43,140 --> 00:13:46,140
But I was like, this lady is fucking awesome.
296
00:13:46,140 --> 00:13:48,140
Oh, I'm demon pussy fucker.
297
00:13:48,140 --> 00:13:49,140
Yeah.
298
00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:53,140
Have you heard the third album, double fist, the pussy of the demon?
299
00:13:53,140 --> 00:13:55,140
I love that shit.
300
00:13:55,140 --> 00:14:00,140
So anyway, and she's like, I or whatever German say, what do they say?
301
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:03,140
So anyway, they show up.
302
00:14:03,140 --> 00:14:04,140
They're very nice.
303
00:14:04,140 --> 00:14:06,140
No problems there, right?
304
00:14:06,140 --> 00:14:10,140
So then low and behold, because all good things must come to an infrared.
305
00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:11,140
Right.
306
00:14:11,140 --> 00:14:12,140
The show begins.
307
00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:21,140
And the MC of the evening, there's a part of me that wants to call out specifically the
308
00:14:21,140 --> 00:14:22,140
MC by name.
309
00:14:22,140 --> 00:14:23,140
Right.
310
00:14:23,140 --> 00:14:26,140
But there's a bigger part of me that's going to do it.
311
00:14:26,140 --> 00:14:27,140
So.
312
00:14:27,140 --> 00:14:32,140
I was like, do you have any clips?
313
00:14:32,140 --> 00:14:34,140
Like do you have any clips?
314
00:14:34,140 --> 00:14:35,140
Does he have any clips?
315
00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:36,140
I, you know what?
316
00:14:36,140 --> 00:14:37,140
Like give me something.
317
00:14:37,140 --> 00:14:38,140
I mean,
318
00:14:38,140 --> 00:14:41,140
No, no, Fred, I will happily, you know what?
319
00:14:41,140 --> 00:14:42,140
I'm going to pull up.
320
00:14:42,140 --> 00:14:45,140
I'm going to pull it up for you because I want to be a judge.
321
00:14:45,140 --> 00:14:46,140
I want to judge somebody.
322
00:14:46,140 --> 00:14:47,140
Right.
323
00:14:47,140 --> 00:14:49,140
I would love for you in judgment.
324
00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:50,140
I would judge.
325
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:53,140
Let me try my screen shot.
326
00:14:53,140 --> 00:14:55,140
I'm feeling all jazzy today.
327
00:14:55,140 --> 00:14:56,140
No, you're going to love this then.
328
00:14:56,140 --> 00:14:57,140
Okay.
329
00:14:57,140 --> 00:14:58,140
So.
330
00:14:58,140 --> 00:15:00,140
No, no, no, I wish.
331
00:15:00,140 --> 00:15:01,140
Oh, yeah.
332
00:15:01,140 --> 00:15:02,140
So we always do that.
333
00:15:02,140 --> 00:15:05,420
I really, there's nothing that I've ever wish, woman.
334
00:15:05,420 --> 00:15:12,140
I would have bought a brand new phone to record the three hours of this.
335
00:15:12,140 --> 00:15:13,140
Yeah.
336
00:15:13,140 --> 00:15:17,140
Just so I can play it for you so that you can wish you weren't dead.
337
00:15:17,140 --> 00:15:20,140
And burn all our jokes like that.
338
00:15:20,140 --> 00:15:21,140
Dude.
339
00:15:21,140 --> 00:15:22,140
Okay.
340
00:15:22,140 --> 00:15:24,140
So let's find we got here's two.
341
00:15:24,140 --> 00:15:25,140
Okay.
342
00:15:25,140 --> 00:15:26,140
Alan, I'm going to put this on the screen.
343
00:15:26,140 --> 00:15:27,140
Now, ladies and gentlemen, I'm in.
344
00:15:27,140 --> 00:15:28,140
Oh, it's too long.
345
00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:29,140
15 minute.
346
00:15:29,140 --> 00:15:33,140
Three minutes.
347
00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:34,140
Three minutes.
348
00:15:34,140 --> 00:15:36,140
Now she has some hour long stuff.
349
00:15:36,140 --> 00:15:37,140
This ain't it.
350
00:15:37,140 --> 00:15:39,140
So three minutes.
351
00:15:39,140 --> 00:15:42,140
Committee and stand up comedy.
352
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:49,140
The comedic stylings of Jen Brown, not the most generic name you could think of.
353
00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:50,140
So here we go.
354
00:15:50,140 --> 00:15:56,140
I hope that Jen Brown estate and her nine YouTube subscribers.
355
00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:59,140
Yeah.
356
00:15:59,140 --> 00:16:06,140
She's got less than Karen.
357
00:16:06,140 --> 00:16:11,140
I'm going to mute until she actually shows up.
358
00:16:11,140 --> 00:16:13,140
No, we can do her.
359
00:16:13,140 --> 00:16:16,140
It's the disclaimer comedy lounge.
360
00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:17,140
Here we go.
361
00:16:17,140 --> 00:16:18,140
Stand up.
362
00:16:18,140 --> 00:16:28,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
363
00:16:28,140 --> 00:16:32,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
364
00:16:32,140 --> 00:16:36,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
365
00:16:36,140 --> 00:16:38,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
366
00:16:38,140 --> 00:16:40,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
367
00:16:40,140 --> 00:16:41,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
368
00:16:41,140 --> 00:16:42,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
369
00:16:42,140 --> 00:16:43,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
370
00:16:43,140 --> 00:16:44,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
371
00:16:44,140 --> 00:16:45,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
372
00:16:45,140 --> 00:16:46,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
373
00:16:46,140 --> 00:16:47,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
374
00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:49,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
375
00:16:49,140 --> 00:16:51,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
376
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:53,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
377
00:16:53,140 --> 00:16:55,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
378
00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:57,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
379
00:16:57,140 --> 00:16:59,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
380
00:16:59,140 --> 00:17:01,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
381
00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:02,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
382
00:17:02,140 --> 00:17:03,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
383
00:17:03,140 --> 00:17:04,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
384
00:17:04,140 --> 00:17:05,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
385
00:17:05,140 --> 00:17:06,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
386
00:17:06,140 --> 00:17:07,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
387
00:17:07,140 --> 00:17:08,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
388
00:17:08,140 --> 00:17:18,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
389
00:17:18,140 --> 00:17:20,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
390
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
391
00:17:22,140 --> 00:17:24,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
392
00:17:24,140 --> 00:17:26,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
393
00:17:26,140 --> 00:17:28,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
394
00:17:28,140 --> 00:17:30,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
395
00:17:30,140 --> 00:17:32,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
396
00:17:32,140 --> 00:17:33,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
397
00:17:33,140 --> 00:17:34,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
398
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:35,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
399
00:17:35,140 --> 00:17:36,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
400
00:17:36,140 --> 00:17:37,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
401
00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:39,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
402
00:17:39,140 --> 00:17:41,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
403
00:17:41,140 --> 00:17:43,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
404
00:17:43,140 --> 00:17:45,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
405
00:17:45,140 --> 00:17:47,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
406
00:17:47,140 --> 00:17:49,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
407
00:17:49,140 --> 00:17:51,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
408
00:17:51,140 --> 00:17:52,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
409
00:17:52,140 --> 00:17:53,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
410
00:17:53,140 --> 00:17:54,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
411
00:17:54,140 --> 00:17:55,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
412
00:17:55,140 --> 00:17:56,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
413
00:17:56,140 --> 00:17:57,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
414
00:17:57,140 --> 00:17:58,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
415
00:17:58,140 --> 00:18:22,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
416
00:18:22,140 --> 00:18:24,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
417
00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:26,140
I'm not going to be a little bit more like you.
418
00:18:26,140 --> 00:18:28,140
I'm sorry I can't.
419
00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:30,140
That's PTSD.
420
00:18:30,140 --> 00:18:31,140
Okay.
421
00:18:31,140 --> 00:18:32,140
Okay.
422
00:18:32,140 --> 00:18:33,140
Okay.
423
00:18:33,140 --> 00:18:41,140
That was the MC of the show.
424
00:18:41,140 --> 00:18:45,140
I was the MC/host of the show.
425
00:18:45,140 --> 00:18:46,140
God damn.
426
00:18:46,140 --> 00:18:53,140
So that's that that person who's shown I will not say her day again.
427
00:18:53,140 --> 00:18:57,540
Let me show you now I will not say her day before.
428
00:18:57,540 --> 00:18:58,380
- Yeah.
429
00:18:58,380 --> 00:19:02,220
- Comes out does about, I'm gonna say seven minutes,
430
00:19:02,220 --> 00:19:05,460
and it felt like three months.
431
00:19:05,460 --> 00:19:08,380
(laughing)
432
00:19:08,380 --> 00:19:10,680
- He's supposed to do like a couple of minutes,
433
00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:14,140
so you're supposed to give him a three year, three or three-minutes.
434
00:19:14,140 --> 00:19:15,980
- He's already warmed up, he warmed up.
435
00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:16,800
- Yeah, you get up.
436
00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:19,460
- You've seen the hits, you know?
437
00:19:19,460 --> 00:19:21,460
- And you're supposed to be funnigat.
438
00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:23,120
- You have to have them see,
439
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,020
it's supposed to be funnier than the comics.
440
00:19:25,020 --> 00:19:27,100
- Right, that's easy, yeah.
441
00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:27,940
- Yep. - Right.
442
00:19:27,940 --> 00:19:29,780
- Because they have the advantage
443
00:19:29,780 --> 00:19:32,140
of whenever they start to fail, they say,
444
00:19:32,140 --> 00:19:34,180
and now let me bring on,
445
00:19:34,180 --> 00:19:35,740
- The ride, yeah.
446
00:19:35,740 --> 00:19:36,580
- New pretty easy job.
447
00:19:36,580 --> 00:19:37,900
I'm MC comedy shows.
448
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:39,580
- It's not that fucking hard.
449
00:19:39,580 --> 00:19:42,740
Trust me, I could do it, anyone could do it.
450
00:19:42,740 --> 00:19:46,900
So, sevenish, tenish, I don't fucking know how many minutes,
451
00:19:46,900 --> 00:19:47,900
I really truly don't.
452
00:19:47,900 --> 00:19:50,540
I couldn't look at my, keep looking at my phone.
453
00:19:50,540 --> 00:19:53,340
It would be rude to the person I was with.
454
00:19:53,340 --> 00:19:57,620
And so, I was like, okay, well, so let's say,
455
00:19:57,620 --> 00:20:00,780
let's call it a tight seven minutes.
456
00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:02,100
- Yeah, seven minutes.
457
00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:02,940
- Go by.
458
00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:04,060
- From the warm up.
459
00:20:04,060 --> 00:20:07,020
- With one to two possible laughs.
460
00:20:07,020 --> 00:20:07,860
- All right.
461
00:20:07,860 --> 00:20:08,700
- Not from me.
462
00:20:08,700 --> 00:20:14,700
And during said time, this person,
463
00:20:14,700 --> 00:20:17,420
it explains that they are a school teacher.
464
00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:23,700
They talk about kids and how kids are mean.
465
00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:27,180
- The opener, the host.
466
00:20:27,180 --> 00:20:28,100
The MC, yeah.
467
00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:28,940
- Yeah, yeah.
468
00:20:28,940 --> 00:20:30,460
- It's like, hey, I'm a school teacher,
469
00:20:30,460 --> 00:20:32,540
not that you could tell.
470
00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,380
Hey, kids are mean.
471
00:20:34,380 --> 00:20:36,820
- They have bombs in them.
472
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:39,140
- They definitely have a lot of mom in them.
473
00:20:39,140 --> 00:20:39,980
- They have them.
474
00:20:39,980 --> 00:20:41,540
She got a school teacher vibe.
475
00:20:41,540 --> 00:20:42,380
- Yeah.
476
00:20:42,380 --> 00:20:44,700
- No, yeah, I'm not arguing that.
477
00:20:44,700 --> 00:20:48,660
- Goes into her time and it's just brutal.
478
00:20:48,660 --> 00:20:51,180
We need to pay teachers more.
479
00:20:51,180 --> 00:20:53,620
- We need to pay them more or get them off the fucking stage,
480
00:20:53,620 --> 00:20:54,460
whatever it takes.
481
00:20:54,460 --> 00:20:56,620
- We need to pay teachers more, man.
482
00:20:56,620 --> 00:20:58,180
- Talks about how.
483
00:20:58,180 --> 00:20:59,700
- 'Cause that's not her dream.
484
00:20:59,700 --> 00:21:05,540
- Well, I was just trying to make him speak, man.
485
00:21:05,540 --> 00:21:07,180
- I hope she's in hell with you.
486
00:21:07,180 --> 00:21:08,180
(laughing)
487
00:21:08,180 --> 00:21:10,660
I hope she's one fucking hell of a teacher, man.
488
00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:12,620
- Even starting books to come.
489
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:19,100
I would have paid twice that to not have to hear it.
490
00:21:19,100 --> 00:21:22,500
- And, Jen, you're so great at assembly.
491
00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:24,500
(laughing)
492
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,340
- Yeah.
493
00:21:25,340 --> 00:21:26,340
- That's right, she does.
494
00:21:26,340 --> 00:21:27,340
- That's a simple one.
495
00:21:27,340 --> 00:21:29,220
- You're working now, so good at it.
496
00:21:29,220 --> 00:21:30,220
- You're working now, so good at it.
497
00:21:30,220 --> 00:21:31,380
- Yeah.
498
00:21:31,380 --> 00:21:33,260
- You're working in that hard line.
499
00:21:33,260 --> 00:21:36,220
- The way you get those kids through the cars.
500
00:21:36,220 --> 00:21:39,220
- Your hands signals are set into none, Jen.
501
00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:41,220
Why don't you take it to the stage?
502
00:21:41,220 --> 00:21:43,980
- Yeah, you can get them on and off the stage
503
00:21:43,980 --> 00:21:45,620
and it's probably better.
504
00:21:45,620 --> 00:21:47,100
- Yeah, and she did.
505
00:21:47,100 --> 00:21:49,060
- So. - She's a little faster.
506
00:21:49,060 --> 00:21:52,740
- So she does the thing, great.
507
00:21:52,740 --> 00:21:53,660
We're gonna call it great.
508
00:21:53,660 --> 00:21:54,500
- Oh.
509
00:21:54,500 --> 00:21:56,860
- Yeah, and not great.
510
00:21:56,860 --> 00:22:00,660
And finally, like, sigh of relief when she's like,
511
00:22:00,660 --> 00:22:03,980
let me bring our first comic to the stage.
512
00:22:03,980 --> 00:22:04,820
- Right.
513
00:22:04,820 --> 00:22:08,300
- He's a guy from Greenwood, South Carolina.
514
00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:11,220
He's been on this and been on that,
515
00:22:11,220 --> 00:22:14,860
like, not like TV or anything, but like.
516
00:22:14,860 --> 00:22:15,860
- Right.
517
00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:17,020
(laughing)
518
00:22:17,020 --> 00:22:19,660
- Well, I mean, I don't wanna build them up too much
519
00:22:19,660 --> 00:22:20,660
for the audience.
520
00:22:20,660 --> 00:22:25,060
- And then the jailbird, he's been on this improv comedy.
521
00:22:25,060 --> 00:22:26,660
- And then the seven news.
522
00:22:26,660 --> 00:22:31,660
- He's been on, stand up, open mic nights here or there,
523
00:22:31,660 --> 00:22:34,820
on, not just went showed up.
524
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:37,820
- Was it comedy TV with Byron Allen?
525
00:22:37,820 --> 00:22:38,660
- Right.
526
00:22:38,660 --> 00:22:39,820
- He's been on it.
527
00:22:39,820 --> 00:22:41,700
- He's on, he's big on YouTube.
528
00:22:41,700 --> 00:22:43,900
He has more than a dozen subscribers.
529
00:22:43,900 --> 00:22:46,260
- Eight more adelaide.
530
00:22:46,260 --> 00:22:47,100
- Y'all.
531
00:22:47,100 --> 00:22:49,220
(laughing)
532
00:22:49,220 --> 00:22:51,300
- I don't know anything about the guy,
533
00:22:51,300 --> 00:22:54,140
but I remember the show would be like, he's not funny.
534
00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:54,980
- Yeah, he's not funny.
535
00:22:54,980 --> 00:22:58,100
- He's getting these fucking people on the show.
536
00:22:58,100 --> 00:22:59,460
- Does he owns it?
537
00:22:59,460 --> 00:23:01,420
- Is that what?
538
00:23:01,420 --> 00:23:02,260
- Yeah, look at that.
539
00:23:02,260 --> 00:23:03,260
- Look at that out.
540
00:23:03,260 --> 00:23:04,100
- Yeah, he owns it.
541
00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:05,100
- Yeah, he owns it.
542
00:23:05,100 --> 00:23:06,620
- This was pre-invent days.
543
00:23:06,620 --> 00:23:08,020
I never looked at him.
544
00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:08,860
- Yeah.
545
00:23:09,820 --> 00:23:14,180
- So she brings in the comedian.
546
00:23:14,180 --> 00:23:16,020
And he's, I'll give him credit.
547
00:23:16,020 --> 00:23:20,900
He felt, it felt to me like he was definitely just a starting out,
548
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,260
you know, like,
549
00:23:22,260 --> 00:23:24,900
budding, beginning of his career comedian.
550
00:23:24,900 --> 00:23:29,140
He had some decent jokes, decent punchlines.
551
00:23:29,140 --> 00:23:33,260
Like, that's just the fluidity of it, right?
552
00:23:33,260 --> 00:23:34,700
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
553
00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:38,260
- It's not easy to, and I'm, I understand.
554
00:23:38,260 --> 00:23:39,700
I am mine, oh, me insane.
555
00:23:39,700 --> 00:23:40,700
Like, oh, this is simple.
556
00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:41,540
Anyone can do this.
557
00:23:41,540 --> 00:23:42,380
- Right.
558
00:23:42,380 --> 00:23:44,140
- The end of comedy is hard, right?
559
00:23:44,140 --> 00:23:45,140
- Right.
560
00:23:45,140 --> 00:23:47,500
- Having the cadence and the flow and all that stuff.
561
00:23:47,500 --> 00:23:49,580
- Right, time and, no.
562
00:23:49,580 --> 00:23:53,780
- And the MC, if the MC doesn't do a good job, man,
563
00:23:53,780 --> 00:23:56,060
it just, you gotta start fusing that.
564
00:23:56,060 --> 00:23:57,580
- Oh, yeah, no, the crowd was not warmed up.
565
00:23:57,580 --> 00:23:59,260
- If the MC's got you going,
566
00:23:59,260 --> 00:24:01,460
when you come in as a comedian,
567
00:24:01,460 --> 00:24:02,820
you have a little bit of leeway
568
00:24:02,820 --> 00:24:04,940
because they're already laughing and shit.
569
00:24:04,940 --> 00:24:06,220
- Right, you know.
570
00:24:06,220 --> 00:24:07,060
- Right.
571
00:24:07,060 --> 00:24:08,540
- So you feel like, oh, they're warmed up,
572
00:24:08,540 --> 00:24:09,500
they've had a few drinks.
573
00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:11,540
Like, is this gonna be a little bit?
574
00:24:11,540 --> 00:24:16,860
- And then, just the, the courage is just,
575
00:24:16,860 --> 00:24:18,180
get on the stage.
576
00:24:18,180 --> 00:24:19,020
- 100%.
577
00:24:19,020 --> 00:24:22,060
- I don't, I mean, just count that at all.
578
00:24:22,060 --> 00:24:25,740
- That takes, to get up in the front of a room with 50 people
579
00:24:25,740 --> 00:24:28,180
and try to make them laugh, it's not easy.
580
00:24:28,180 --> 00:24:30,860
- Right, especially with all white.
581
00:24:30,860 --> 00:24:31,700
- Yeah.
582
00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:32,700
(laughing)
583
00:24:32,700 --> 00:24:33,540
- I am.
584
00:24:33,540 --> 00:24:35,340
- This is stop black, this is got black?
585
00:24:35,340 --> 00:24:36,180
- There, yes.
586
00:24:36,180 --> 00:24:37,020
- Three of them.
587
00:24:37,020 --> 00:24:37,860
- Yeah.
588
00:24:37,860 --> 00:24:41,180
- Three of the four comedians.
589
00:24:41,180 --> 00:24:42,260
- Get these from Greenwood.
590
00:24:42,260 --> 00:24:43,100
- Oh yeah, yeah.
591
00:24:43,100 --> 00:24:43,940
- Yeah, I found them.
592
00:24:43,940 --> 00:24:44,940
(laughing)
593
00:24:44,940 --> 00:24:47,660
- So, it very much felt like, oh, this is,
594
00:24:47,660 --> 00:24:52,460
- Yeah, one white lady, just slavering the black dudes.
595
00:24:52,460 --> 00:24:53,300
- Two.
596
00:24:53,300 --> 00:24:55,620
- She's slavering the black dudes in front of him.
597
00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:57,420
- 'Cause the black girls, like, the slave folks.
598
00:24:57,420 --> 00:25:00,420
- African American gentlemen, African American lady,
599
00:25:00,420 --> 00:25:03,820
old white lady, younger, young-ish white gentleman.
600
00:25:03,820 --> 00:25:04,980
That was the order.
601
00:25:04,980 --> 00:25:05,820
- Oh, yeah.
602
00:25:05,820 --> 00:25:06,980
- Yeah, I don't know, definitely, man.
603
00:25:06,980 --> 00:25:09,460
I've been like, this is like a slave auction, open.
604
00:25:09,460 --> 00:25:11,660
- Well, and so he didn't quite get to that.
605
00:25:11,660 --> 00:25:14,140
The second lady, the lady almost did.
606
00:25:14,140 --> 00:25:16,300
But stopped just short of dancing.
607
00:25:16,300 --> 00:25:17,180
- I was saying that, yeah.
608
00:25:17,180 --> 00:25:19,140
- She was not gonna dance.
609
00:25:19,140 --> 00:25:21,300
- She was not gonna make them laugh somehow.
610
00:25:21,300 --> 00:25:25,300
- He didn't have the dexterity or the endurance dance for four minutes.
611
00:25:25,300 --> 00:25:29,660
So, the gentleman shows up, he tells the,
612
00:25:29,660 --> 00:25:32,020
he starts out with says, and this is how I'm like,
613
00:25:32,020 --> 00:25:34,340
okay, this is why I know this guy's new.
614
00:25:34,340 --> 00:25:35,820
And he's learning 'cause he's like,
615
00:25:35,820 --> 00:25:40,340
who in this room, a full of elderly to middle-aged white people?
616
00:25:40,340 --> 00:25:42,340
- It loves bass.
617
00:25:42,340 --> 00:25:43,500
- I'm taking bass.
618
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:46,140
- And now, personally, I do love bass.
619
00:25:46,140 --> 00:25:47,540
- You put the whole thing on there.
620
00:25:47,540 --> 00:25:48,540
- I did.
621
00:25:48,540 --> 00:25:50,140
- And I like the, I enjoy it.
622
00:25:50,140 --> 00:25:51,740
- If he was like, I love bass.
623
00:25:51,740 --> 00:25:52,580
- I love bass.
624
00:25:52,580 --> 00:25:53,420
- It's a ball.
625
00:25:53,420 --> 00:25:54,700
- Yeah, I'm like, if he looked around,
626
00:25:54,700 --> 00:25:56,260
nobody would switch the beat.
627
00:25:56,260 --> 00:25:57,620
- No, I didn't look around.
628
00:25:57,620 --> 00:25:58,460
(laughing)
629
00:25:58,460 --> 00:26:00,220
I was already full of the beat.
630
00:26:00,220 --> 00:26:02,060
- But there's nothing.
631
00:26:02,060 --> 00:26:03,900
- I was like, oh, the only reason.
632
00:26:03,900 --> 00:26:05,700
- I finally see it.
633
00:26:05,700 --> 00:26:08,700
- I thought I'd go to talk to me.
634
00:26:08,700 --> 00:26:10,220
- Yeah, I was like, here we go.
635
00:26:10,220 --> 00:26:12,140
Like, in fact, why guy, obviously,
636
00:26:12,140 --> 00:26:13,140
- I got a basketball ball.
637
00:26:13,140 --> 00:26:14,380
- You saved the show, man.
638
00:26:14,380 --> 00:26:15,380
Did you save the show?
639
00:26:15,380 --> 00:26:16,700
Did you give a singer?
640
00:26:16,700 --> 00:26:17,540
- No, I did.
641
00:26:17,540 --> 00:26:18,380
- You know, I didn't give a singer.
642
00:26:18,380 --> 00:26:19,220
Did you give him anything?
643
00:26:19,220 --> 00:26:20,060
- I didn't do anything,
644
00:26:20,060 --> 00:26:21,060
'cause he didn't call on me.
645
00:26:21,060 --> 00:26:23,940
He said, he just, he asked the question,
646
00:26:23,940 --> 00:26:25,780
as a general question.
647
00:26:25,780 --> 00:26:28,060
Not as like, if you like bass,
648
00:26:28,060 --> 00:26:30,220
it was just like, who here likes basketball?
649
00:26:30,220 --> 00:26:31,060
- Yeah.
650
00:26:31,060 --> 00:26:31,900
- Right?
651
00:26:31,900 --> 00:26:33,060
And so,
652
00:26:33,060 --> 00:26:33,900
- Oh my God.
653
00:26:33,900 --> 00:26:35,300
- I just realized this could go on the whole show.
654
00:26:35,300 --> 00:26:38,100
So, we gotta try and tighten this up,
655
00:26:38,100 --> 00:26:39,700
tighten it up to a short 30.
656
00:26:39,700 --> 00:26:40,700
- Oh, yeah.
657
00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:42,220
- He's like, that's been three hours.
658
00:26:42,220 --> 00:26:43,060
I'm gonna make you, so you know.
659
00:26:43,060 --> 00:26:45,460
- I'm gonna make you guys, we live every fucking minute.
660
00:26:45,460 --> 00:26:47,100
I get on that.
661
00:26:47,100 --> 00:26:50,340
So, he comes out and he's like, hey, - We lived in here for free.
662
00:26:50,340 --> 00:26:52,700
- Yeah, you're, I'm saving everybody 40 bucks.
663
00:26:52,700 --> 00:26:55,580
At least, you don't have to buy the shitty pickle pizza
664
00:26:55,580 --> 00:26:57,220
that I decide on with no meat.
665
00:26:57,220 --> 00:26:59,300
Why would I order a pizza with no meat, Alan?
666
00:26:59,300 --> 00:27:00,620
Because I'm an idiot.
667
00:27:01,780 --> 00:27:04,260
- And that would have been a better joke than any of the other
668
00:27:04,260 --> 00:27:05,100
of the ones that any of them.
669
00:27:05,100 --> 00:27:06,660
- Who are you talking, Chris?
670
00:27:06,660 --> 00:27:08,140
- I thought it had a, it was just,
671
00:27:08,140 --> 00:27:09,140
(laughing)
672
00:27:09,140 --> 00:27:10,940
it was like our special pickle pizza.
673
00:27:10,940 --> 00:27:12,540
We make our pickles in house and I was like,
674
00:27:12,540 --> 00:27:13,540
(groaning)
675
00:27:13,540 --> 00:27:14,780
I like pickles.
676
00:27:14,780 --> 00:27:18,140
And then, like, I think about it was,
677
00:27:18,140 --> 00:27:19,460
it didn't cut them up, or anything.
678
00:27:19,460 --> 00:27:20,940
It was just like, you don't,
679
00:27:20,940 --> 00:27:22,620
it was on the pizza that I had to eat the dong
680
00:27:22,620 --> 00:27:24,380
and the pizza was the whole thing,
681
00:27:24,380 --> 00:27:25,380
but it was,
682
00:27:25,380 --> 00:27:26,220
- You're not enjoying it.
683
00:27:26,220 --> 00:27:27,660
- I didn't eat any new, needs a title.
684
00:27:27,660 --> 00:27:28,500
- Yes, I am.
685
00:27:28,500 --> 00:27:29,340
- Who is?
686
00:27:29,340 --> 00:27:30,420
(laughing)
687
00:27:30,420 --> 00:27:32,180
- I would be Mike Lagello.
688
00:27:32,180 --> 00:27:34,900
But so anyway, so he's like,
689
00:27:34,900 --> 00:27:36,940
who's everybody likes basketball?
690
00:27:36,940 --> 00:27:39,060
And they're like, Merr, not as much.
691
00:27:39,060 --> 00:27:41,900
But he's like, well, who's everybody's favorite basketball player?
692
00:27:41,900 --> 00:27:44,900
And I'm like, why people, like Larry Bird?
693
00:27:44,900 --> 00:27:45,980
- Oh yeah.
694
00:27:45,980 --> 00:27:46,980
- You know, blah, blah, blah.
695
00:27:46,980 --> 00:27:49,540
Mostly just a lot of people say Larry Bird.
696
00:27:49,540 --> 00:27:50,380
- Yeah.
697
00:27:50,380 --> 00:27:54,140
- And then finally, finally, someone got around,
698
00:27:54,140 --> 00:27:56,740
this is like 30 seconds of people naming names
699
00:27:56,740 --> 00:27:58,260
that were not what he was looking for.
700
00:27:58,260 --> 00:27:59,580
- Yeah, it could be like,
701
00:27:59,580 --> 00:28:00,420
- Yeah, really?
702
00:28:00,420 --> 00:28:04,580
- It was, he was like, he's got somebody say Kobe.
703
00:28:04,580 --> 00:28:06,420
- No, no, no.
704
00:28:06,420 --> 00:28:07,260
- Yeah, exactly.
705
00:28:07,260 --> 00:28:08,900
He was like, no, no, no.
706
00:28:08,900 --> 00:28:10,220
You think I play for the Lakers?
707
00:28:10,220 --> 00:28:11,700
Not Magic Johnson.
708
00:28:11,700 --> 00:28:13,460
Newer than that, no, not Jack.
709
00:28:13,460 --> 00:28:14,460
- No, not Jack.
710
00:28:14,460 --> 00:28:16,860
- No, still not Larry Bird, sir.
711
00:28:16,860 --> 00:28:21,460
And then, finally, was like, oh, somebody said Kobe.
712
00:28:21,460 --> 00:28:22,300
- Oh, it's great.
713
00:28:22,300 --> 00:28:23,140
- Oh, it's great.
714
00:28:23,140 --> 00:28:25,460
(laughing)
715
00:28:25,460 --> 00:28:26,900
And he was like, yes, Kobe Bryant.
716
00:28:26,900 --> 00:28:28,220
Everybody knows Kobe Bryant.
717
00:28:28,220 --> 00:28:31,100
- Yeah, it's all right be the late, great Kobe Bryant, right?
718
00:28:31,100 --> 00:28:33,060
And we're like, yeah, and he's like,
719
00:28:33,060 --> 00:28:35,020
I'll never forget the day that Kobe died.
720
00:28:35,020 --> 00:28:37,860
And I was like, okay, this is a weird premise for a joke,
721
00:28:37,860 --> 00:28:39,140
but he saved it.
722
00:28:39,140 --> 00:28:44,140
He was like, my mom called me and was like, son,
723
00:28:44,140 --> 00:28:47,820
you need to hear this, you need to know that Kobe died.
724
00:28:47,820 --> 00:28:51,420
And he was like, no, Bob, you know, and like, oh my God,
725
00:28:51,420 --> 00:28:53,300
I can't believe that Kobe died.
726
00:28:53,300 --> 00:28:56,020
He's like, yeah, he died in a helicopter on the way
727
00:28:56,020 --> 00:28:57,540
to a basketball game.
728
00:28:57,540 --> 00:29:00,060
And just everybody's sad and everything.
729
00:29:00,060 --> 00:29:02,580
And he's like, you know, he's like, it hurt.
730
00:29:02,580 --> 00:29:04,180
And like, I was crying and everything.
731
00:29:04,180 --> 00:29:06,020
And I was worried about his family.
732
00:29:06,020 --> 00:29:08,500
And I said, you know, what about his family and everything?
733
00:29:08,500 --> 00:29:11,580
And she was like, oh, you know, whatever died and everything.
734
00:29:11,580 --> 00:29:14,420
And he's like, well, yeah, but my brother
735
00:29:14,420 --> 00:29:16,260
doesn't even have any kids.
736
00:29:16,260 --> 00:29:17,260
And she's like, what?
737
00:29:17,260 --> 00:29:19,780
And he's like, my brother's name is Jacobi,
738
00:29:19,780 --> 00:29:21,300
but everybody calls him Kobe.
739
00:29:21,300 --> 00:29:23,380
So his mom called and said, Kobe, nothing.
740
00:29:23,380 --> 00:29:24,540
(laughing)
741
00:29:24,540 --> 00:29:25,900
You know what I'm saying?
742
00:29:25,900 --> 00:29:26,740
- Oh, otherwise.
743
00:29:26,740 --> 00:29:28,260
- That's a good burn.
744
00:29:28,260 --> 00:29:29,260
(laughing)
745
00:29:29,260 --> 00:29:31,220
- That's a good burn.
746
00:29:31,220 --> 00:29:34,300
- That's a life experience, but yeah.
747
00:29:34,300 --> 00:29:35,620
- Right, yeah. - That's a good,
748
00:29:35,620 --> 00:29:37,780
I was like, that's a good set up for a joke.
749
00:29:37,780 --> 00:29:39,300
- Yeah, yeah.
750
00:29:39,300 --> 00:29:41,180
- And then he talked about like his brother Mary
751
00:29:41,180 --> 00:29:45,500
and a white woman and how he went from Kobe to Kobe.
752
00:29:45,500 --> 00:29:46,660
(laughing)
753
00:29:46,660 --> 00:29:47,980
- No, no, no, no, no, sorry.
754
00:29:47,980 --> 00:29:48,980
It was Kobe.
755
00:29:48,980 --> 00:29:49,820
- It was Kobe.
756
00:29:49,820 --> 00:29:52,020
- It was from Jacob.
757
00:29:52,020 --> 00:29:53,140
- Yeah.
758
00:29:53,140 --> 00:29:54,220
- Yeah.
759
00:29:54,220 --> 00:29:55,900
- And so, and that was funny.
760
00:29:55,900 --> 00:29:58,260
Like that was, and I was like, this guy's alright, you know?
761
00:29:58,260 --> 00:29:59,100
He did okay.
762
00:29:59,100 --> 00:30:02,380
- So, cut out, cut out in a broad before a minute.
763
00:30:02,380 --> 00:30:03,620
I'm curious about it.
764
00:30:03,620 --> 00:30:07,340
So, you remember when Shaq and Kobe played together
765
00:30:07,340 --> 00:30:08,620
in the Lakers, right?
766
00:30:08,620 --> 00:30:09,460
- I knew something.
767
00:30:09,460 --> 00:30:13,020
- This was something I found out here recently.
768
00:30:13,020 --> 00:30:16,980
Well, after they split up,
769
00:30:16,980 --> 00:30:20,180
that was, he was somewhere at a party or something
770
00:30:20,180 --> 00:30:23,860
and he got the microphone, he started rapping.
771
00:30:23,860 --> 00:30:27,100
- And this is on like YouTube still, you can find it.
772
00:30:27,100 --> 00:30:29,460
It's like, he was a notorious rapper.
773
00:30:29,460 --> 00:30:31,460
- He said, "How is this supposed to be?"
774
00:30:31,460 --> 00:30:33,460
- Yeah, he was like, "Kobe, how about it?"
775
00:30:33,460 --> 00:30:34,900
And say, "Yeah, I'm saying."
776
00:30:34,900 --> 00:30:37,980
- He was like, "I was thought it was a rap."
777
00:30:37,980 --> 00:30:40,940
- Yeah, I'm saying like, he just made like,
778
00:30:40,940 --> 00:30:42,780
something, and just, you know,
779
00:30:42,780 --> 00:30:43,780
the dissapointment.
780
00:30:43,780 --> 00:30:44,620
- Rappin' a rap.
781
00:30:44,620 --> 00:30:45,620
- Rappin' a rap.
782
00:30:45,620 --> 00:30:46,620
- Rappin' a rap.
783
00:30:46,620 --> 00:30:48,980
- Rappin' a big prankster.
784
00:30:48,980 --> 00:30:53,820
And like, he would take players' mouthpieces
785
00:30:54,100 --> 00:30:58,900
and shove them in his ass and then put it back.
786
00:30:58,900 --> 00:30:59,940
And then put it back.
787
00:30:59,940 --> 00:31:02,660
So like, I found that out.
788
00:31:02,660 --> 00:31:05,580
And I was like, "What are you doing with each other?"
789
00:31:05,580 --> 00:31:08,020
- It wasn't just a rap player.
790
00:31:08,020 --> 00:31:10,580
- 'Cause it would never forgive someone for doing that.
791
00:31:10,580 --> 00:31:14,100
- No, yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what broke the,
792
00:31:14,100 --> 00:31:14,940
broke the lakers.
793
00:31:14,940 --> 00:31:16,100
- Like, "Fly the understanding."
794
00:31:16,100 --> 00:31:19,980
- Yeah, I would, yeah, I can't be in a locker room with that guy.
795
00:31:19,980 --> 00:31:21,060
- Yeah, he understand that.
796
00:31:21,060 --> 00:31:22,580
- Yeah, he got that guy.
797
00:31:22,580 --> 00:31:24,020
That's why he left.
798
00:31:24,020 --> 00:31:26,140
That's why he left him when the game.
799
00:31:26,140 --> 00:31:27,140
- I get it.
800
00:31:27,140 --> 00:31:29,100
- Yeah, I would do the same thing.
801
00:31:29,100 --> 00:31:30,140
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
802
00:31:30,140 --> 00:31:30,980
- Nasty.
803
00:31:30,980 --> 00:31:33,180
- Nasty, that's disgusting.
804
00:31:33,180 --> 00:31:35,980
I mean, I'm all for good fun and shit.
805
00:31:35,980 --> 00:31:36,980
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
806
00:31:36,980 --> 00:31:38,300
- That's just too fucking awful.
807
00:31:38,300 --> 00:31:39,620
- No, like, I crazy.
808
00:31:39,620 --> 00:31:40,900
- If you got an honest,
809
00:31:40,900 --> 00:31:43,020
- Four and a half foot ass crack.
810
00:31:43,020 --> 00:31:44,020
- Yeah, exactly.
811
00:31:44,020 --> 00:31:46,020
- I mean, like, you know,
812
00:31:46,020 --> 00:31:47,540
- That's a whole fucking hell of a piece.
813
00:31:47,540 --> 00:31:50,740
- You walk by someone, you know, area and like,
814
00:31:50,740 --> 00:31:53,100
it's fart on their shirt or something.
815
00:31:53,100 --> 00:31:54,660
- That's a flask of prank.
816
00:31:54,660 --> 00:31:56,020
- Oh, you're not, yeah, yeah.
817
00:31:56,020 --> 00:31:58,620
- It's not, not gross, but it's not like,
818
00:31:58,620 --> 00:32:00,020
- It's not like, I'm full, right?
819
00:32:00,020 --> 00:32:01,500
- Yeah, you know.
820
00:32:01,500 --> 00:32:02,420
- It's not like,
821
00:32:02,420 --> 00:32:04,340
- Ask the mouse with a shack.
822
00:32:04,340 --> 00:32:06,500
- I'm not gonna try to give a mad,
823
00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:07,740
- This is dairy.
824
00:32:07,740 --> 00:32:08,420
- You know, I have like,
825
00:32:08,420 --> 00:32:10,620
imagine the diseases.
826
00:32:10,620 --> 00:32:11,460
- Yeah.
827
00:32:11,460 --> 00:32:13,020
- And you know, and I love shack.
828
00:32:13,020 --> 00:32:13,860
- Yeah.
829
00:32:13,860 --> 00:32:15,220
- If you know shack, don't eat clean either.
830
00:32:15,220 --> 00:32:16,380
He's not like eating salads.
831
00:32:16,380 --> 00:32:17,860
(laughing)
832
00:32:17,860 --> 00:32:19,020
Like, I love shack,
833
00:32:19,020 --> 00:32:21,020
but I know that motherfucker could eat.
834
00:32:21,020 --> 00:32:21,940
(laughing)
835
00:32:21,940 --> 00:32:23,100
- So, like,
836
00:32:23,100 --> 00:32:24,220
(laughing)
837
00:32:24,220 --> 00:32:25,860
Applebee's favorite.
838
00:32:25,860 --> 00:32:26,700
- Oh, I know that.
839
00:32:26,700 --> 00:32:27,980
- Are you kidding me?
840
00:32:27,980 --> 00:32:29,260
I'm like, it's Mara Riblitz.
841
00:32:29,260 --> 00:32:30,260
- Yeah.
842
00:32:30,260 --> 00:32:31,620
- Rowers.
843
00:32:31,620 --> 00:32:33,220
- For weeks.
844
00:32:33,220 --> 00:32:34,980
Maybe like, we got two nights off.
845
00:32:34,980 --> 00:32:36,860
I've been in Applebee's the whole time.
846
00:32:36,860 --> 00:32:38,820
- I don't have these old stuff.
847
00:32:38,820 --> 00:32:40,140
- No, oh, you could eat.
848
00:32:40,140 --> 00:32:41,780
I bought the Applebee's.
849
00:32:41,780 --> 00:32:43,620
- I'm fucking all about to do this.
850
00:32:43,620 --> 00:32:44,620
- To go to home.
851
00:32:44,620 --> 00:32:46,060
- Then I stuck all the,
852
00:32:46,060 --> 00:32:48,220
I stuck all the cups up my ass.
853
00:32:48,220 --> 00:32:50,220
(laughing)
854
00:32:50,220 --> 00:32:51,940
- I bought the Applebee's.
855
00:32:51,940 --> 00:32:53,340
I'm my ass taste.
856
00:32:53,340 --> 00:32:54,340
(laughing)
857
00:32:54,340 --> 00:32:56,180
I bought the Applebee's on Santa Monica Boulevard.
858
00:32:56,180 --> 00:32:57,420
I'm my ass taste.
859
00:32:57,420 --> 00:32:59,420
(laughing)
860
00:32:59,420 --> 00:33:00,460
(laughing)
861
00:33:00,460 --> 00:33:01,660
So,
862
00:33:01,660 --> 00:33:02,180
so,
863
00:33:02,180 --> 00:33:03,580
comedian one,
864
00:33:03,580 --> 00:33:04,660
does his job.
865
00:33:04,660 --> 00:33:06,140
He's fine.
866
00:33:06,140 --> 00:33:07,180
Not amazing.
867
00:33:07,180 --> 00:33:08,540
Start out great.
868
00:33:08,540 --> 00:33:10,420
Kind of faded as, you know, again,
869
00:33:10,420 --> 00:33:12,940
and which is how comedians usually work.
870
00:33:12,940 --> 00:33:13,780
Right.
871
00:33:13,780 --> 00:33:15,740
You got your opening joke, big joke,
872
00:33:15,740 --> 00:33:16,500
then it kind of like,
873
00:33:16,500 --> 00:33:17,500
I'm in a little as long
874
00:33:17,500 --> 00:33:19,420
and then you have like a closing joke.
875
00:33:19,420 --> 00:33:20,260
Which is fine.
876
00:33:20,260 --> 00:33:22,940
Nothing, nothing like out of the blue, nothing.
877
00:33:22,940 --> 00:33:27,100
Which ushers on everyone's favorite MC again,
878
00:33:27,100 --> 00:33:29,140
to do,
879
00:33:29,140 --> 00:33:30,420
and now Fred,
880
00:33:30,420 --> 00:33:31,660
how many minutes?
881
00:33:31,660 --> 00:33:36,060
After the initial seven-ish, we're gonna say,
882
00:33:36,060 --> 00:33:38,540
which felt like 1,08 minutes.
883
00:33:38,540 --> 00:33:42,700
How many minutes do you think you should do as an MC?
884
00:33:42,700 --> 00:33:43,540
Between set,
885
00:33:43,540 --> 00:33:45,740
between comedians, right?
886
00:33:45,740 --> 00:33:46,580
- Just, you know,
887
00:33:46,580 --> 00:33:48,180
you got a few minutes tops.
888
00:33:48,180 --> 00:33:51,180
- What time did it start?
889
00:33:51,180 --> 00:33:53,060
- We started 7'30,
890
00:33:53,060 --> 00:33:54,740
it was scheduled until 10.
891
00:33:54,740 --> 00:33:57,460
- Yeah, so,
892
00:33:57,460 --> 00:33:58,620
- With four- - One and a half hours,
893
00:33:58,620 --> 00:33:59,460
no.
894
00:33:59,460 --> 00:34:00,460
- Right.
895
00:34:00,460 --> 00:34:01,580
- So, there's some shouldn't be any.
896
00:34:01,580 --> 00:34:03,300
- Everybody, yeah.
897
00:34:03,300 --> 00:34:05,740
- Everybody gets in and it's in.
898
00:34:05,740 --> 00:34:07,740
- I think they all did about 15.
899
00:34:07,740 --> 00:34:08,580
- 15 minutes.
900
00:34:08,580 --> 00:34:10,300
- Yeah, which is a little bit.
901
00:34:10,300 --> 00:34:12,020
- With her doing,
902
00:34:12,020 --> 00:34:14,380
with her doing, you know, three to five minutes,
903
00:34:14,380 --> 00:34:16,380
that's another 15.
904
00:34:16,380 --> 00:34:18,260
- Yeah, an intermission, like an intermission.
905
00:34:18,260 --> 00:34:20,580
- Hey, that's about, yeah, that's about 20,500.
906
00:34:20,580 --> 00:34:22,580
You should do about three minutes in between.
907
00:34:22,580 --> 00:34:23,740
- Three minutes tops.
908
00:34:23,740 --> 00:34:24,580
- Yeah.
909
00:34:24,580 --> 00:34:27,220
- Here's what comes back for another hot seven.
910
00:34:27,220 --> 00:34:28,060
- Oh.
911
00:34:28,060 --> 00:34:29,420
(laughing)
912
00:34:29,420 --> 00:34:30,420
- And like,
913
00:34:30,420 --> 00:34:31,260
- I was like,
914
00:34:31,260 --> 00:34:32,500
- Anybody got a mouthpiece?
915
00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:33,500
- I was like,
916
00:34:33,500 --> 00:34:34,340
- Yeah.
917
00:34:34,340 --> 00:34:35,340
- Anyway,
918
00:34:35,340 --> 00:34:36,180
- No, sincerely,
919
00:34:36,180 --> 00:34:37,180
this is the point where I'm like,
920
00:34:37,180 --> 00:34:39,340
I should you get us another round of drinks.
921
00:34:39,340 --> 00:34:40,340
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
922
00:34:40,340 --> 00:34:41,380
- And like all the drinks.
923
00:34:41,380 --> 00:34:42,380
- Yeah, you do.
924
00:34:42,380 --> 00:34:43,220
- Yeah, I was like,
925
00:34:43,220 --> 00:34:45,220
I'm just getting 26 shots of liquor.
926
00:34:45,220 --> 00:34:46,060
- Yes.
927
00:34:46,060 --> 00:34:48,980
- This is gonna make this someone enjoyable.
928
00:34:48,980 --> 00:34:49,820
- Hope.
929
00:34:49,820 --> 00:34:50,660
- And I did not.
930
00:34:50,660 --> 00:34:51,500
- Hope,
931
00:34:51,500 --> 00:34:52,340
- 'cause they were like,
932
00:34:52,340 --> 00:34:53,340
- I drink the funniest,
933
00:34:53,340 --> 00:34:54,180
- You're wrong.
934
00:34:54,180 --> 00:34:55,020
- Hope you.
935
00:34:55,020 --> 00:34:56,620
- But, yeah, I got you drink.
936
00:34:56,620 --> 00:34:59,460
So, she does her time again,
937
00:34:59,460 --> 00:35:00,380
and it's just as,
938
00:35:00,380 --> 00:35:03,340
it's just as great as the first time.
939
00:35:03,340 --> 00:35:04,420
So,
940
00:35:04,420 --> 00:35:05,260
in and out,
941
00:35:05,260 --> 00:35:06,980
I sincerely don't remember any of it.
942
00:35:06,980 --> 00:35:08,220
I do remember
943
00:35:08,220 --> 00:35:11,340
being sad.
944
00:35:11,340 --> 00:35:12,180
(laughing)
945
00:35:12,180 --> 00:35:13,020
- Since we're all good.
946
00:35:13,020 --> 00:35:14,700
- Because I just remember being like,
947
00:35:14,700 --> 00:35:15,860
- Yeah.
948
00:35:15,860 --> 00:35:19,140
- Like I'm here with somebody that I enjoy spending time with.
949
00:35:19,140 --> 00:35:20,460
- You know, I want this.
950
00:35:20,460 --> 00:35:23,100
(soft music)
951
00:35:23,100 --> 00:35:24,380
- I could get back up there, man.
952
00:35:24,380 --> 00:35:25,220
Like,
953
00:35:25,220 --> 00:35:27,220
- That's about the time I took you away.
954
00:35:27,220 --> 00:35:28,180
- If I could learn to write,
955
00:35:28,180 --> 00:35:29,820
if I could learn to write,
956
00:35:29,820 --> 00:35:30,860
if I could learn to write.
957
00:35:30,860 --> 00:35:32,700
- You could write.
958
00:35:32,700 --> 00:35:33,700
- You could be in the,
959
00:35:33,700 --> 00:35:34,540
- I don't know what to write.
960
00:35:34,540 --> 00:35:35,380
- You could write.
961
00:35:35,380 --> 00:35:36,220
- You're special.
962
00:35:36,220 --> 00:35:37,060
- I don't write.
963
00:35:37,060 --> 00:35:38,060
- Mama loves you.
964
00:35:38,060 --> 00:35:38,900
- Yeah.
965
00:35:38,900 --> 00:35:39,740
- Yeah.
966
00:35:39,740 --> 00:35:40,580
- But yeah.
967
00:35:40,580 --> 00:35:41,420
- If I could write jokes,
968
00:35:41,420 --> 00:35:42,260
I could,
969
00:35:42,260 --> 00:35:43,500
man, I used to just,
970
00:35:43,500 --> 00:35:45,140
I remember when I drove Port List, dude,
971
00:35:45,140 --> 00:35:45,980
that's all I did.
972
00:35:45,980 --> 00:35:46,820
I just,
973
00:35:46,820 --> 00:35:47,820
'cause I might just say,
974
00:35:47,820 --> 00:35:49,500
- Never wrote anything down, man.
975
00:35:49,500 --> 00:35:50,340
Never wrote anything down.
976
00:35:50,340 --> 00:35:51,340
- Not funny.
977
00:35:51,340 --> 00:35:52,340
And so,
978
00:35:52,340 --> 00:35:53,180
- No,
979
00:35:53,180 --> 00:35:54,020
- Funny off the memory,
980
00:35:54,020 --> 00:35:54,860
I can't remember shit.
981
00:35:54,860 --> 00:35:56,060
- Person one,
982
00:35:56,060 --> 00:35:58,100
or comedian one down the drain,
983
00:35:58,100 --> 00:35:58,940
great job.
984
00:35:58,940 --> 00:35:59,940
Great enough.
985
00:35:59,940 --> 00:36:00,780
- Yeah.
986
00:36:00,780 --> 00:36:02,540
- Comediantoom is a larger,
987
00:36:02,540 --> 00:36:04,380
a lady of larger carriage,
988
00:36:04,380 --> 00:36:06,260
African American lady,
989
00:36:06,260 --> 00:36:08,540
total lot of big girl jokes,
990
00:36:08,540 --> 00:36:11,100
total lot of like single lady,
991
00:36:11,100 --> 00:36:12,180
- Right, right.
992
00:36:12,180 --> 00:36:13,460
- Didn't hear any French-jicking jokes.
993
00:36:13,460 --> 00:36:14,300
However,
994
00:36:14,300 --> 00:36:16,100
she did pull out a pair of tweezers
995
00:36:16,100 --> 00:36:18,260
from her bra four different times.
996
00:36:18,260 --> 00:36:21,140
- About small dicks.
997
00:36:21,140 --> 00:36:22,380
- No, about tweezers.
998
00:36:22,380 --> 00:36:23,220
- Yeah.
999
00:36:23,220 --> 00:36:24,860
- Talk about tweezers.
1000
00:36:24,860 --> 00:36:26,220
- Kids, open up tweezers?
1001
00:36:26,220 --> 00:36:27,900
- A lot of jokes about tweezers.
1002
00:36:27,900 --> 00:36:29,060
(laughs)
1003
00:36:29,060 --> 00:36:29,900
- It's like small dicks.
1004
00:36:29,900 --> 00:36:31,460
- About how she always has tweezers.
1005
00:36:31,460 --> 00:36:32,300
And like,
1006
00:36:32,300 --> 00:36:33,140
I don't know,
1007
00:36:33,140 --> 00:36:34,140
how fucking hell I was there.
1008
00:36:34,140 --> 00:36:34,980
- Yeah, I just,
1009
00:36:34,980 --> 00:36:35,820
yeah, the tweezers.
1010
00:36:35,820 --> 00:36:36,740
- Yeah, I was just lost,
1011
00:36:36,740 --> 00:36:37,580
just like,
1012
00:36:37,580 --> 00:36:38,580
look, I got these,
1013
00:36:38,580 --> 00:36:39,580
and like,
1014
00:36:39,580 --> 00:36:40,420
and they were like,
1015
00:36:40,420 --> 00:36:41,220
everybody,
1016
00:36:41,220 --> 00:36:42,060
Brad does,
1017
00:36:42,060 --> 00:36:42,900
and I was like,
1018
00:36:42,900 --> 00:36:43,420
I don't get it though.
1019
00:36:43,420 --> 00:36:44,380
- But if he's still girl,
1020
00:36:44,380 --> 00:36:45,820
you gotta have on your bed.
1021
00:36:45,820 --> 00:36:46,820
I got you.
1022
00:36:46,820 --> 00:36:47,660
- Right.
1023
00:36:47,660 --> 00:36:48,660
- Like,
1024
00:36:48,660 --> 00:36:49,660
- Please, please, please.
1025
00:36:49,660 --> 00:36:50,660
(laughs)
1026
00:36:50,660 --> 00:36:51,900
- You're talking about bras?
1027
00:36:51,900 --> 00:36:53,060
You're talking about men?
1028
00:36:53,060 --> 00:36:53,900
You know,
1029
00:36:53,900 --> 00:36:54,740
which one's fine?
1030
00:36:54,740 --> 00:36:55,620
I like a joke about men.
1031
00:36:55,620 --> 00:36:56,860
(laughs)
1032
00:36:56,860 --> 00:36:57,700
- I thought the thing,
1033
00:36:57,700 --> 00:36:58,540
I thought the marker was gonna say,
1034
00:36:58,540 --> 00:36:59,820
I like men.
1035
00:36:59,820 --> 00:37:00,980
(laughs)
1036
00:37:00,980 --> 00:37:02,100
- I love men.
1037
00:37:02,100 --> 00:37:02,940
- I love men.
1038
00:37:02,940 --> 00:37:04,980
- Men are my second favorite sex.
1039
00:37:04,980 --> 00:37:06,060
(laughs)
1040
00:37:06,060 --> 00:37:06,900
- What is the thing?
1041
00:37:06,900 --> 00:37:07,740
- Behind me.
1042
00:37:07,740 --> 00:37:10,940
So,
1043
00:37:10,940 --> 00:37:12,540
so she does her,
1044
00:37:12,540 --> 00:37:13,860
her time,
1045
00:37:13,860 --> 00:37:15,540
totally uneventful,
1046
00:37:15,540 --> 00:37:16,540
fine,
1047
00:37:16,540 --> 00:37:18,380
tries to hot-curve stickers at the end
1048
00:37:18,380 --> 00:37:19,220
with all the photos.
1049
00:37:19,220 --> 00:37:20,180
- Black girl, what you doing?
1050
00:37:20,180 --> 00:37:21,540
I'm just tweezin'.
1051
00:37:21,540 --> 00:37:23,100
- You know girl,
1052
00:37:23,100 --> 00:37:25,260
just twigin' in tweezin'.
1053
00:37:25,260 --> 00:37:26,980
- Borkin' in tweezin', baby girl.
1054
00:37:26,980 --> 00:37:27,820
(laughs)
1055
00:37:27,820 --> 00:37:28,980
- And
1056
00:37:28,980 --> 00:37:29,980
- Which is,
1057
00:37:29,980 --> 00:37:31,900
that's a daughter present in the name of this show.
1058
00:37:31,900 --> 00:37:32,740
So,
1059
00:37:32,740 --> 00:37:34,820
- I'm tuckin' in.
1060
00:37:34,820 --> 00:37:36,460
- Borkin' in tweezin', baby.
1061
00:37:36,460 --> 00:37:37,460
- Borkin' in tweezin'.
1062
00:37:37,460 --> 00:37:39,540
(laughs)
1063
00:37:39,540 --> 00:37:40,540
And so,
1064
00:37:41,300 --> 00:37:42,300
though she does hers,
1065
00:37:42,300 --> 00:37:44,060
it's fine, perfectly fine.
1066
00:37:44,060 --> 00:37:45,580
Nothing to complain about.
1067
00:37:45,580 --> 00:37:46,340
Decent,
1068
00:37:46,340 --> 00:37:47,700
decent set, not great.
1069
00:37:47,700 --> 00:37:48,540
- All right.
1070
00:37:48,540 --> 00:37:49,380
- All right.
1071
00:37:49,380 --> 00:37:50,380
- Couple of apps.
1072
00:37:50,380 --> 00:37:51,220
- Big one.
1073
00:37:51,220 --> 00:37:53,100
- Does a thing great.
1074
00:37:53,100 --> 00:37:53,980
So,
1075
00:37:53,980 --> 00:37:55,460
does hers,
1076
00:37:55,460 --> 00:37:56,940
MC comes back on,
1077
00:37:56,940 --> 00:37:59,740
talks about one of the people in the cast said they were,
1078
00:37:59,740 --> 00:38:00,580
like,
1079
00:38:00,580 --> 00:38:01,740
this is okay.
1080
00:38:01,740 --> 00:38:02,740
(clears throat)
1081
00:38:02,740 --> 00:38:04,060
This is where it got me.
1082
00:38:04,060 --> 00:38:06,260
This is where I turn from like,
1083
00:38:06,260 --> 00:38:08,220
like,
1084
00:38:08,220 --> 00:38:09,740
just be in there
1085
00:38:09,740 --> 00:38:10,700
and be in like,
1086
00:38:10,700 --> 00:38:11,540
it's okay,
1087
00:38:11,540 --> 00:38:12,940
everything's gonna be fine.
1088
00:38:12,940 --> 00:38:13,780
- All right.
1089
00:38:13,780 --> 00:38:15,700
- To a visceral sense of anger.
1090
00:38:15,700 --> 00:38:16,820
(laughs)
1091
00:38:16,820 --> 00:38:18,220
Because,
1092
00:38:18,220 --> 00:38:20,100
at this point, she has,
1093
00:38:20,100 --> 00:38:20,940
she's taking,
1094
00:38:20,940 --> 00:38:21,780
she's like,
1095
00:38:21,780 --> 00:38:23,420
- Oh, and did that someone say?
1096
00:38:23,420 --> 00:38:26,060
- Did someone in the audience say,
1097
00:38:26,060 --> 00:38:26,900
like,
1098
00:38:26,900 --> 00:38:29,260
they're from Florida or something?
1099
00:38:29,260 --> 00:38:30,100
And they're like,
1100
00:38:30,100 --> 00:38:31,020
yeah,
1101
00:38:31,020 --> 00:38:32,100
during the other set,
1102
00:38:32,100 --> 00:38:34,180
and then she goes on a tangent about,
1103
00:38:34,180 --> 00:38:39,420
attempting to make jokes about that thing.
1104
00:38:39,420 --> 00:38:41,500
Like she was thinking about it.
1105
00:38:41,500 --> 00:38:43,140
- Oh, she was like,
1106
00:38:43,140 --> 00:38:44,060
she was freestyle.
1107
00:38:44,060 --> 00:38:45,540
- She was like, yeah, freestyle.
1108
00:38:45,540 --> 00:38:46,460
- Like improv.
1109
00:38:46,460 --> 00:38:47,420
- Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
1110
00:38:47,420 --> 00:38:51,140
- And she talks about her time as an improv actor.
1111
00:38:51,140 --> 00:38:52,700
- Oh.
1112
00:38:52,700 --> 00:38:53,540
- Oh yeah,
1113
00:38:53,540 --> 00:38:55,900
and how it led to her love for the stage.
1114
00:38:55,900 --> 00:38:56,740
- And I'm,
1115
00:38:56,740 --> 00:38:57,580
- Yeah.
1116
00:38:57,580 --> 00:39:00,740
- I'm so bad. - And I would rather be a,
1117
00:39:00,740 --> 00:39:01,580
- Yes, I am.
1118
00:39:01,580 --> 00:39:03,340
- than a person of their say an M then.
1119
00:39:03,340 --> 00:39:04,440
- Yes, ah, ah, ah, ah.
1120
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:05,280
- And so,
1121
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:06,040
he's like,
1122
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:09,220
okay, I did three minutes of terrible shit.
1123
00:39:09,220 --> 00:39:10,500
And here again,
1124
00:39:10,500 --> 00:39:11,860
and it was more than three minutes again,
1125
00:39:11,860 --> 00:39:13,700
I lost track at this point.
1126
00:39:13,700 --> 00:39:15,380
And when she came up the second time,
1127
00:39:15,380 --> 00:39:16,660
I literally went to the bathroom.
1128
00:39:16,660 --> 00:39:17,500
I was like,
1129
00:39:17,500 --> 00:39:19,020
I need to walk around here.
1130
00:39:19,020 --> 00:39:19,860
So I did,
1131
00:39:19,860 --> 00:39:20,700
I was like,
1132
00:39:20,700 --> 00:39:21,700
- I was gonna rush.
1133
00:39:21,700 --> 00:39:22,540
- And then this,
1134
00:39:22,540 --> 00:39:23,380
so that,
1135
00:39:23,380 --> 00:39:24,220
and then we take a break,
1136
00:39:24,220 --> 00:39:25,060
then we take,
1137
00:39:25,060 --> 00:39:25,900
we get an intermission.
1138
00:39:25,900 --> 00:39:26,740
So we get like 15 minutes.
1139
00:39:26,740 --> 00:39:27,580
- Oh, yeah,
1140
00:39:27,580 --> 00:39:28,460
and you got an intermission.
1141
00:39:28,460 --> 00:39:29,300
- Yeah,
1142
00:39:29,300 --> 00:39:30,140
and I was like,
1143
00:39:30,140 --> 00:39:31,300
okay, cool intermission.
1144
00:39:31,300 --> 00:39:34,300
I can pretend I'm dead for 15 minutes.
1145
00:39:34,300 --> 00:39:35,460
(laughing)
1146
00:39:35,460 --> 00:39:36,460
And I couldn't,
1147
00:39:36,460 --> 00:39:38,340
because it only ended up being seven minutes.
1148
00:39:38,340 --> 00:39:39,860
- Oh.
1149
00:39:39,860 --> 00:39:41,300
- Oh, I know Fred's getting out of notebooks
1150
00:39:41,300 --> 00:39:42,220
so he can write some jokes.
1151
00:39:42,220 --> 00:39:44,380
(laughing)
1152
00:39:44,380 --> 00:39:46,180
Whatever you gotta do, man, please,
1153
00:39:46,180 --> 00:39:47,940
don't make me go through this again.
1154
00:39:47,940 --> 00:39:49,980
So she gets back,
1155
00:39:49,980 --> 00:39:50,820
she's like,
1156
00:39:50,820 --> 00:39:52,900
hey, all right, you know, here comes our next comedian.
1157
00:39:52,900 --> 00:39:55,780
She's been doing stand-up for seven years.
1158
00:39:55,780 --> 00:39:56,620
- Oh.
1159
00:39:56,620 --> 00:39:57,620
- And,
1160
00:39:57,620 --> 00:39:58,460
- Okay, there we go.
1161
00:39:58,460 --> 00:39:59,580
- Yeah, all right, yeah, all right.
1162
00:39:59,580 --> 00:40:00,420
- All right.
1163
00:40:00,420 --> 00:40:01,740
- And you're gonna love her stuff.
1164
00:40:01,740 --> 00:40:03,140
She's really funny.
1165
00:40:03,140 --> 00:40:04,460
Her name is
1166
00:40:04,460 --> 00:40:05,820
some old white lady name.
1167
00:40:05,820 --> 00:40:06,980
I don't remember.
1168
00:40:06,980 --> 00:40:08,980
- The Jonathanity.
1169
00:40:08,980 --> 00:40:10,060
- If it was the Jonathanity,
1170
00:40:10,060 --> 00:40:10,860
I'd have been like, all right,
1171
00:40:10,860 --> 00:40:14,420
he got my interest back in the game.
1172
00:40:14,420 --> 00:40:16,980
- Dick Titties with hope.
1173
00:40:16,980 --> 00:40:18,660
(laughing)
1174
00:40:18,660 --> 00:40:20,340
- Right, I don't like.
1175
00:40:20,340 --> 00:40:21,180
All right.
1176
00:40:21,180 --> 00:40:23,380
- Hall of B,
1177
00:40:23,380 --> 00:40:24,740
see Hall of Famer.
1178
00:40:24,740 --> 00:40:26,340
Dick Titties with hope.
1179
00:40:26,340 --> 00:40:27,580
The Jonathanity.
1180
00:40:27,580 --> 00:40:29,780
(laughing)
1181
00:40:29,780 --> 00:40:34,180
- I love that.
1182
00:40:34,180 --> 00:40:36,260
- Again, I would have been okay with that.
1183
00:40:36,260 --> 00:40:37,100
- I love that.
1184
00:40:37,100 --> 00:40:38,500
- Or just one.
1185
00:40:38,500 --> 00:40:39,340
- Turned in.
1186
00:40:39,340 --> 00:40:41,460
- You thought there's no hustling, yes.
1187
00:40:41,460 --> 00:40:43,220
- So, doing what she's gotta do.
1188
00:40:43,220 --> 00:40:44,580
- And so,
1189
00:40:44,580 --> 00:40:46,620
Tittie and those things.
1190
00:40:46,620 --> 00:40:47,940
- So she comes on the stage.
1191
00:40:47,940 --> 00:40:50,820
She is, she's been doing this for seven years, Fred.
1192
00:40:50,820 --> 00:40:51,660
- And me?
1193
00:40:51,660 --> 00:40:53,100
- And she tells us that.
1194
00:40:53,100 --> 00:40:55,300
And she also tells us
1195
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:58,940
that she is 67 years old.
1196
00:40:58,940 --> 00:41:00,900
- Wow.
1197
00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:02,100
- Right, which I'm like, great.
1198
00:41:02,100 --> 00:41:03,380
Second career.
1199
00:41:03,380 --> 00:41:04,700
- That's good.
1200
00:41:04,700 --> 00:41:05,540
- But good for you.
1201
00:41:05,540 --> 00:41:06,380
- You know you're doing it.
1202
00:41:06,380 --> 00:41:07,900
- Do it, that's the goal.
1203
00:41:07,900 --> 00:41:09,180
- No, no, 100%.
1204
00:41:09,180 --> 00:41:10,620
And then she says,
1205
00:41:10,620 --> 00:41:14,140
who knows the sound that a cat makes when it throws up?
1206
00:41:14,140 --> 00:41:17,380
And one of the people who was sitting with us
1207
00:41:17,380 --> 00:41:18,820
in the beginning, one of the older people,
1208
00:41:18,820 --> 00:41:20,060
who were cool.
1209
00:41:20,060 --> 00:41:22,060
And this is what I'm glad that they moved.
1210
00:41:22,060 --> 00:41:23,100
Who is now in the front,
1211
00:41:23,100 --> 00:41:25,980
made the sound that a cat makes when it throws up.
1212
00:41:25,980 --> 00:41:28,820
Which I'm not familiar with that sound, thankfully.
1213
00:41:28,820 --> 00:41:29,660
I do have a cat,
1214
00:41:29,660 --> 00:41:32,340
but if the thing starts to throw up, I kick it.
1215
00:41:32,340 --> 00:41:33,820
So,
1216
00:41:33,820 --> 00:41:34,660
I'm like,
1217
00:41:34,660 --> 00:41:36,460
you're a quiet cat.
1218
00:41:36,460 --> 00:41:38,580
So,
1219
00:41:38,580 --> 00:41:40,420
so she makes the noise
1220
00:41:40,420 --> 00:41:42,780
to a glorious laughter and applause.
1221
00:41:42,780 --> 00:41:46,580
Everyone that's not me is like,
1222
00:41:46,580 --> 00:41:49,780
oh, that's exactly what a cat sounds like when it throws up.
1223
00:41:49,780 --> 00:41:51,020
- Girl,
1224
00:41:51,020 --> 00:41:55,260
but Zyna, you can't throw it up, Joke is the shit.
1225
00:41:55,260 --> 00:41:56,100
- It's so good.
1226
00:41:56,100 --> 00:41:57,740
(laughing)
1227
00:41:57,740 --> 00:42:00,500
Which gave the lady in the front.
1228
00:42:00,500 --> 00:42:01,340
- I really,
1229
00:42:01,340 --> 00:42:03,540
I'm right here in the letter, but.
1230
00:42:03,540 --> 00:42:05,700
A little bit, she got a little,
1231
00:42:05,700 --> 00:42:07,260
a little winder sails at this point,
1232
00:42:07,260 --> 00:42:09,740
the lady in the front row, not the comedian.
1233
00:42:09,740 --> 00:42:14,020
And every second that there was little to no noise,
1234
00:42:14,020 --> 00:42:17,740
she made the sound again for the rest of the show.
1235
00:42:17,740 --> 00:42:19,940
No, yeah, well,
1236
00:42:19,940 --> 00:42:21,140
- It made the meeting.
1237
00:42:21,140 --> 00:42:22,380
- No, no.
1238
00:42:22,380 --> 00:42:24,140
- No, the lady in the front row.
1239
00:42:24,140 --> 00:42:28,980
- The lady in the front row kept making the sound.
1240
00:42:28,980 --> 00:42:30,260
It was very much like,
1241
00:42:30,260 --> 00:42:31,100
there's a,
1242
00:42:31,100 --> 00:42:32,740
there's a skit on impractical jokers,
1243
00:42:32,740 --> 00:42:34,500
which if you're familiar with that,
1244
00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:37,780
where one of the guys has to tell somebody,
1245
00:42:37,780 --> 00:42:41,420
he's in a meeting and he has to say like a boss, right?
1246
00:42:41,420 --> 00:42:42,820
And so the first time he's like,
1247
00:42:42,820 --> 00:42:44,060
the girl's talking about what she's doing,
1248
00:42:44,060 --> 00:42:44,900
and he's like,
1249
00:42:44,900 --> 00:42:45,740
"Like a boss?"
1250
00:42:45,740 --> 00:42:47,420
And everybody's like, "Yeah, right, yeah."
1251
00:42:47,420 --> 00:42:50,180
And then they make him keep saying the joke.
1252
00:42:50,180 --> 00:42:51,020
And it's just like,
1253
00:42:51,020 --> 00:42:52,180
"Oh."
1254
00:42:52,180 --> 00:42:55,220
And this is what it felt like to be there.
1255
00:42:55,220 --> 00:42:57,340
And so she's just like,
1256
00:42:57,340 --> 00:42:58,500
"Wah!"
1257
00:42:58,500 --> 00:43:00,140
And like everybody's like,
1258
00:43:00,140 --> 00:43:01,260
"Okay, bitch, shut up."
1259
00:43:01,260 --> 00:43:03,020
Like, "Wah!"
1260
00:43:03,020 --> 00:43:03,860
(laughing)
1261
00:43:03,860 --> 00:43:06,380
And so, while this is happening,
1262
00:43:06,380 --> 00:43:08,180
while that kept happening,
1263
00:43:08,180 --> 00:43:10,940
the lady who was doing the comedy,
1264
00:43:10,940 --> 00:43:13,620
air quotes for our listeners and oh,
1265
00:43:13,620 --> 00:43:16,980
starts doing what I would refer to in the business
1266
00:43:16,980 --> 00:43:18,180
as a recurring gag,
1267
00:43:18,180 --> 00:43:22,180
which is to say that she,
1268
00:43:22,180 --> 00:43:23,180
(laughing)
1269
00:43:23,180 --> 00:43:24,740
"No, no, thankfully it wasn't that,
1270
00:43:24,740 --> 00:43:27,260
and I appreciate that it wasn't that."
1271
00:43:27,260 --> 00:43:29,620
But there were a lot of cap-pots of jokes.
1272
00:43:29,620 --> 00:43:33,500
But she kept doing the thing where,
1273
00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:37,380
like she sets up the premise and then inserts
1274
00:43:37,380 --> 00:43:40,260
what she wants someone to say as like,
1275
00:43:40,260 --> 00:43:42,940
so she'd say, "Oh, I told a joke about,
1276
00:43:42,940 --> 00:43:45,420
I don't know, autism, right?"
1277
00:43:45,420 --> 00:43:48,580
Maybe she, they got into some weird shit toward the end.
1278
00:43:48,580 --> 00:43:50,060
(laughing)
1279
00:43:50,060 --> 00:43:51,860
And like, it hadn't already been there.
1280
00:43:51,860 --> 00:43:53,740
And then she's like,
1281
00:43:53,740 --> 00:43:55,900
"Well, after I told that joke,
1282
00:43:55,900 --> 00:43:58,420
a lady came up to me after my show,
1283
00:43:58,420 --> 00:44:02,500
and does the walk, does a different walk every time,
1284
00:44:02,500 --> 00:44:06,060
and sets herself up for this punchline."
1285
00:44:06,060 --> 00:44:08,660
And she did this, at one point,
1286
00:44:08,660 --> 00:44:11,700
she just did, the lady came up to me after the show,
1287
00:44:11,700 --> 00:44:13,140
six times in a row.
1288
00:44:13,140 --> 00:44:15,020
(laughing)
1289
00:44:15,020 --> 00:44:16,860
Didn't even tell jokes in between.
1290
00:44:16,860 --> 00:44:19,380
Just was like, and then after that,
1291
00:44:19,380 --> 00:44:21,260
a lady came up to me and was like,
1292
00:44:21,260 --> 00:44:23,380
"I don't like that joke,"
1293
00:44:23,380 --> 00:44:27,100
and she's like, "Oh, well, Grandma, I'm a Grandma too."
1294
00:44:27,100 --> 00:44:29,100
And then lady came up and pulled it out.
1295
00:44:29,100 --> 00:44:31,820
And it just, (laughing)
1296
00:44:31,820 --> 00:44:34,660
I was shocked that this was acceptable.
1297
00:44:34,660 --> 00:44:39,660
- Dude, that's, that's, that's, I mean, I don't know, man.
1298
00:44:39,660 --> 00:44:43,660
- All that said, I need to remind people,
1299
00:44:43,660 --> 00:44:46,740
I need to remind people, I had a great time.
1300
00:44:46,740 --> 00:44:50,180
So I had a great time in it,
1301
00:44:50,180 --> 00:44:52,620
because, and I know why this happened, Redd.
1302
00:44:52,620 --> 00:44:54,900
The reason this happened is because,
1303
00:44:54,900 --> 00:44:57,540
we were headed out, I said, "Here's the deal.
1304
00:44:57,540 --> 00:44:59,180
This is either gonna be funny,
1305
00:44:59,180 --> 00:45:04,140
or it's gonna be so not funny that it's funny."
1306
00:45:04,140 --> 00:45:05,460
- That's gonna be funny, yeah.
1307
00:45:05,460 --> 00:45:07,620
- And I was wrong on both counts.
1308
00:45:07,620 --> 00:45:10,460
(laughing)
1309
00:45:10,460 --> 00:45:14,460
But so this, this lady, this 67-year-old, lovely lady,
1310
00:45:14,460 --> 00:45:17,540
takes herself off the stage
1311
00:45:17,540 --> 00:45:22,540
and our trusted MC for the night comes back on.
1312
00:45:22,820 --> 00:45:26,140
And this time, starts talking about religion.
1313
00:45:26,140 --> 00:45:30,020
Which is one of the two,
1314
00:45:30,020 --> 00:45:33,060
you do not speak of these things in any part.
1315
00:45:33,060 --> 00:45:34,820
- I'm not gonna do like,
1316
00:45:34,820 --> 00:45:38,380
unless you have a tight five on it.
1317
00:45:38,380 --> 00:45:39,220
- You would say it.
1318
00:45:39,220 --> 00:45:40,460
- You've got it, yeah.
1319
00:45:40,460 --> 00:45:41,660
- You've got to have stuff.
1320
00:45:41,660 --> 00:45:42,500
- Different take.
1321
00:45:42,500 --> 00:45:44,380
- Yeah, you, yeah.
1322
00:45:44,380 --> 00:45:45,500
- No stuttering about.
1323
00:45:45,500 --> 00:45:48,300
- She's talking about knock 'em down.
1324
00:45:48,300 --> 00:45:51,340
- She's talking about how she's Southern Baptist,
1325
00:45:51,340 --> 00:45:53,980
and her husband is Catholic or Methodist,
1326
00:45:53,980 --> 00:45:56,220
and how, when they got married,
1327
00:45:56,220 --> 00:45:59,180
they were trying to figure out who was gonna be what,
1328
00:45:59,180 --> 00:46:03,660
and like, too much, and not enough jokes.
1329
00:46:03,660 --> 00:46:04,500
- Too much.
1330
00:46:04,500 --> 00:46:05,340
- I don't joke.
1331
00:46:05,340 --> 00:46:06,180
- Too much.
1332
00:46:06,180 --> 00:46:07,020
(laughing)
1333
00:46:07,020 --> 00:46:09,780
- And I said, "Put her in the Epstein vials."
1334
00:46:09,780 --> 00:46:11,620
(laughing)
1335
00:46:11,620 --> 00:46:13,220
- And the Fredsteen vials.
1336
00:46:13,220 --> 00:46:14,740
- And the Fredsteen vials.
1337
00:46:14,740 --> 00:46:16,100
- Yeah, the Fredsteen vials.
1338
00:46:16,100 --> 00:46:17,340
- At least the Fredsteen vials.
1339
00:46:17,340 --> 00:46:19,180
- We released the Fredsteen vials, right?
1340
00:46:19,180 --> 00:46:21,300
- Yeah, we never gonna release the Fredsteen vials.
1341
00:46:21,300 --> 00:46:22,580
- Yeah, we never gonna have them.
1342
00:46:22,580 --> 00:46:23,420
- Can't get the votes.
1343
00:46:23,420 --> 00:46:24,420
- Never gonna get 'em.
1344
00:46:24,420 --> 00:46:26,380
- So, I have a gotta get 'em, right now.
1345
00:46:26,380 --> 00:46:30,220
- I've rejected the fuck out of myself over and over.
1346
00:46:30,220 --> 00:46:35,220
So, she goes down, she's done, we think, we hope,
1347
00:46:35,220 --> 00:46:39,220
and brings on the last community of the night,
1348
00:46:39,220 --> 00:46:42,540
by far, the one with the most credentials, right?
1349
00:46:42,540 --> 00:46:46,260
Local guy from, like, the founding area,
1350
00:46:46,260 --> 00:46:49,860
does a decent, like,
1351
00:46:49,860 --> 00:46:53,140
does a decent set, Stone Reccomedy,
1352
00:46:53,140 --> 00:46:54,660
talks about drugs a lot,
1353
00:46:54,660 --> 00:46:56,900
has, looks like Kyle Mooney from Saturday Night Live,
1354
00:46:56,900 --> 00:46:59,860
you know who that is, which is should.
1355
00:46:59,860 --> 00:47:03,460
And it's fine, it's just fine.
1356
00:47:03,460 --> 00:47:05,900
Nothing great, just, yeah.
1357
00:47:05,900 --> 00:47:07,980
Just exactly, but you know what, like, I,
1358
00:47:07,980 --> 00:47:12,980
I applaud them for trying, he at least kept the energy up.
1359
00:47:12,980 --> 00:47:13,820
- Right.
1360
00:47:13,820 --> 00:47:15,700
- And there's something to be said for that.
1361
00:47:15,700 --> 00:47:17,420
- Right, right, right. - But he kept his flow,
1362
00:47:17,420 --> 00:47:19,820
he kept it moving, or their joke hit or not,
1363
00:47:19,820 --> 00:47:21,500
it didn't seem to affect them.
1364
00:47:21,500 --> 00:47:24,620
He just kept doing his set and I appreciate that.
1365
00:47:24,620 --> 00:47:29,620
So, he's done, and like, she comes back up.
1366
00:47:29,620 --> 00:47:34,820
And I was like, we gotta go, like we can't.
1367
00:47:34,820 --> 00:47:36,180
- Yeah, I can't have it.
1368
00:47:36,180 --> 00:47:39,860
- No, I was like, we don't have to listen to her anymore.
1369
00:47:39,860 --> 00:47:41,900
The comedian part is over now.
1370
00:47:41,900 --> 00:47:43,660
- Oh yeah, it's over, yeah.
1371
00:47:43,660 --> 00:47:45,100
- Yeah, and I'm like, there's no more,
1372
00:47:45,100 --> 00:47:46,700
whatever she has to say from here on out
1373
00:47:46,700 --> 00:47:48,780
is not relevant to anything that is-
1374
00:47:48,780 --> 00:47:50,300
- Guys, don't leave!
1375
00:47:50,300 --> 00:47:54,100
I have a great story about silly one more minutes
1376
00:47:54,100 --> 00:47:56,860
that I can go, we gotta fill the time till 10,
1377
00:47:56,860 --> 00:47:57,860
and I'm 26.
1378
00:47:57,860 --> 00:48:00,940
That's what it felt like, and I was like, we gotta go.
1379
00:48:00,940 --> 00:48:03,780
Like, we're, and so we-
1380
00:48:03,780 --> 00:48:05,100
- It's so boring.
1381
00:48:05,100 --> 00:48:05,940
- Oh, God.
1382
00:48:05,940 --> 00:48:09,420
- I wish I'd loved to, so, I wish more than anything
1383
00:48:09,420 --> 00:48:11,020
that that was the case.
1384
00:48:11,020 --> 00:48:15,020
And so, finally, we end the show, and she's, you know,
1385
00:48:15,020 --> 00:48:17,500
she's just like, oh, don't forget to follow us on
1386
00:48:17,500 --> 00:48:20,140
social media, follow all the comedians,
1387
00:48:20,140 --> 00:48:23,340
so we can do this again, and I'm like, what's that?
1388
00:48:23,340 --> 00:48:26,860
Which they will do it again, because they sold it out.
1389
00:48:26,860 --> 00:48:31,260
So, I mean, 50 people, 20 bucks ahead, a thousand bucks,
1390
00:48:31,260 --> 00:48:32,100
right off the get.
1391
00:48:32,100 --> 00:48:36,100
- Oh my God, I think the comedians get.
1392
00:48:36,100 --> 00:48:37,780
- Probably a hundred bucks, tops.
1393
00:48:37,780 --> 00:48:40,420
- Top.
1394
00:48:40,420 --> 00:48:42,020
- They were good 15 minutes.
1395
00:48:42,020 --> 00:48:43,460
- Yeah, no, no, I'm saying, but I mean,
1396
00:48:43,460 --> 00:48:46,700
that would be a generous, let's be honest.
1397
00:48:46,700 --> 00:48:50,500
Probably 50 bucks, maybe a bar tap, maybe 50 bucks
1398
00:48:50,500 --> 00:48:52,580
and a bar tap, right?
1399
00:48:52,580 --> 00:48:54,700
50 bucks and a $25 bar tap, something like that.
1400
00:48:54,700 --> 00:48:58,380
Would be my, I think that's the maximum amount that you get.
1401
00:48:58,380 --> 00:49:00,780
But they know that they can get comedians like this,
1402
00:49:00,780 --> 00:49:02,700
and again, no offense to these comedians,
1403
00:49:02,700 --> 00:49:05,300
they did their best, but they know they can get these
1404
00:49:05,300 --> 00:49:08,580
kind of guys in for cheap, because most audience who are
1405
00:49:08,580 --> 00:49:11,740
trying to work will do any show because it gives them
1406
00:49:11,740 --> 00:49:14,100
a chance to work on their material, right?
1407
00:49:14,100 --> 00:49:19,100
So let's say the door, you say 50 people times 20, right?
1408
00:49:19,100 --> 00:49:21,220
- Yep.
1409
00:49:21,220 --> 00:49:23,780
- So that's two grand, it's just $2,000.
1410
00:49:23,780 --> 00:49:24,780
- $2,000.
1411
00:49:24,780 --> 00:49:26,100
- $1,000.
1412
00:49:26,100 --> 00:49:26,940
- $1,000.
1413
00:49:26,940 --> 00:49:27,780
- $1,000.
1414
00:49:27,780 --> 00:49:28,780
- $1,000.
1415
00:49:28,780 --> 00:49:29,620
- Okay, you're not a man.
1416
00:49:29,620 --> 00:49:30,780
- No, no.
1417
00:49:30,780 --> 00:49:32,260
- Not a man, okay.
1418
00:49:32,260 --> 00:49:35,980
- But, and then we ran up, I was about to say drinks,
1419
00:49:35,980 --> 00:49:39,220
food, with tap, with like tipping everything,
1420
00:49:39,220 --> 00:49:40,500
about $85.
1421
00:49:40,500 --> 00:49:41,340
- Yeah.
1422
00:49:41,340 --> 00:49:44,060
- Couple of beers, a couple of mixed drinks,
1423
00:49:44,060 --> 00:49:49,060
food, right in that 80s, so the venue made,
1424
00:49:49,060 --> 00:49:51,380
they probably made, they did find,
1425
00:49:51,380 --> 00:49:52,940
they got pretty sure they made find.
1426
00:49:52,940 --> 00:49:56,780
- And I think everybody ate, it was on Friday night.
1427
00:49:56,780 --> 00:49:58,380
- It was on Friday night.
1428
00:49:58,380 --> 00:50:01,100
- But it was separate from the rest of the business.
1429
00:50:01,100 --> 00:50:01,940
- Right.
1430
00:50:01,940 --> 00:50:02,780
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1431
00:50:02,780 --> 00:50:05,740
- The rest of the brewery is still operating as normal,
1432
00:50:05,740 --> 00:50:06,740
just, where is it?
1433
00:50:06,740 --> 00:50:07,980
- There's more, because I've been inside,
1434
00:50:07,980 --> 00:50:09,460
where is the bar?
1435
00:50:09,460 --> 00:50:12,980
- It's by the bar, there's it stairs down to like a business.
1436
00:50:12,980 --> 00:50:15,380
- Oh, it's under me?
1437
00:50:15,380 --> 00:50:17,820
- Yeah, it's like bars.
1438
00:50:17,820 --> 00:50:19,820
You walk in, the bar is in front of you,
1439
00:50:19,820 --> 00:50:21,260
you go to the right hand side of the bar,
1440
00:50:21,260 --> 00:50:23,420
and there's a couple of steps down.
1441
00:50:23,420 --> 00:50:24,460
Yeah, and so it was down there,
1442
00:50:24,460 --> 00:50:26,540
and this is the size of the room, nothing crazy.
1443
00:50:26,540 --> 00:50:27,380
- I know, basement.
1444
00:50:27,380 --> 00:50:30,740
- So, yeah, little sex dungeon, you know, that'd be fine.
1445
00:50:30,740 --> 00:50:31,900
(laughing)
1446
00:50:31,900 --> 00:50:34,820
- It would have been a preferable experience, in my opinion.
1447
00:50:34,820 --> 00:50:36,300
(laughing)
1448
00:50:36,300 --> 00:50:38,540
Either way, even if it was an all-do sex dungeon,
1449
00:50:38,540 --> 00:50:41,220
I'd break out that leather suit again.
1450
00:50:41,220 --> 00:50:42,540
(laughing)
1451
00:50:42,540 --> 00:50:45,060
Feel better than what we just experienced.
1452
00:50:45,060 --> 00:50:46,620
I'll take one in the back.
1453
00:50:46,620 --> 00:50:48,620
Again, get for it.
1454
00:50:48,620 --> 00:50:49,780
- Anything for comedy.
1455
00:50:49,780 --> 00:50:53,300
Anything for the joke?
1456
00:50:53,300 --> 00:50:58,300
So, we leave, thankfully, and the sign,
1457
00:50:58,300 --> 00:51:00,660
okay, Fred, I think you can agree with me.
1458
00:51:00,660 --> 00:51:05,380
The sign of, like, going to a great comedy show is like,
1459
00:51:05,380 --> 00:51:09,220
hey, I feel energized, I feel funny,
1460
00:51:09,220 --> 00:51:11,500
I feel like everything, like, ha ha ha,
1461
00:51:11,500 --> 00:51:14,340
I read Light Moon, "Happy Time,"
1462
00:51:14,340 --> 00:51:18,940
I have never felt less funny in my fucking life.
1463
00:51:18,940 --> 00:51:20,780
- That's just like, you didn't,
1464
00:51:20,780 --> 00:51:24,300
I tried to, 'cause she was like, that wasn't great.
1465
00:51:24,300 --> 00:51:28,780
- You did not see, that's, you said your expectations weighed,
1466
00:51:28,780 --> 00:51:29,620
right?
1467
00:51:29,620 --> 00:51:34,460
- No, I didn't, Fred, that's how low it was, Fred.
1468
00:51:34,460 --> 00:51:35,780
(laughing)
1469
00:51:35,780 --> 00:51:39,700
- What you heard, was you could not have had
1470
00:51:39,700 --> 00:51:42,140
your expectations?
1471
00:51:42,140 --> 00:51:44,620
- No, I expected it to be, like I said,
1472
00:51:44,620 --> 00:51:49,060
I expected it to either be decent on the top end,
1473
00:51:49,060 --> 00:51:53,060
like decent or terrible on the bottom end.
1474
00:51:53,060 --> 00:51:56,700
And as I said before, I was wrong on both counts.
1475
00:51:56,700 --> 00:52:01,700
So, I probably laughed a total of four times throughout the night.
1476
00:52:01,700 --> 00:52:06,100
- I would like to maybe go,
1477
00:52:06,100 --> 00:52:08,780
I'd have to take it out one night myself, you know what I mean?
1478
00:52:08,780 --> 00:52:11,260
- I feel like the next time they do this,
1479
00:52:11,260 --> 00:52:14,780
we're fucking going as a comedy trio.
1480
00:52:14,780 --> 00:52:16,700
(laughing)
1481
00:52:16,700 --> 00:52:19,420
- As a trio, and we're gonna see exactly what it's like.
1482
00:52:19,420 --> 00:52:20,900
And we're gonna livestream it.
1483
00:52:20,900 --> 00:52:22,700
We're gonna fucking make you the podcast
1484
00:52:22,700 --> 00:52:24,340
while they're doing the comedy.
1485
00:52:24,340 --> 00:52:25,180
(laughing)
1486
00:52:25,180 --> 00:52:27,300
You can hear it, ladies and gentlemen, lie.
1487
00:52:27,300 --> 00:52:29,820
- The new kill Tony.
1488
00:52:29,820 --> 00:52:31,540
(laughing)
1489
00:52:31,540 --> 00:52:32,540
- Kill myself.
1490
00:52:32,540 --> 00:52:34,820
(laughing)
1491
00:52:34,820 --> 00:52:37,300
Comedy and Boutman, quote unquote.
1492
00:52:38,220 --> 00:52:40,860
So, all right, I know it's late.
1493
00:52:40,860 --> 00:52:44,260
It was, it was worth 20 bucks if, no it wasn't.
1494
00:52:44,260 --> 00:52:45,780
But, we could go home.
1495
00:52:45,780 --> 00:52:47,700
- You see our content about it.
1496
00:52:47,700 --> 00:52:48,980
- Oh, the black league is collecting.
1497
00:52:48,980 --> 00:52:50,300
- Where's it from that?
1498
00:52:50,300 --> 00:52:51,660
I hope it was funny.
1499
00:52:51,660 --> 00:52:53,300
'Cause if you laugh, you're gonna.
1500
00:52:53,300 --> 00:52:56,020
- If you laugh more than all the audience.
1501
00:52:56,020 --> 00:52:57,740
(laughing)
1502
00:52:57,740 --> 00:52:59,940
So, all right, we'll take a super quick break
1503
00:52:59,940 --> 00:53:01,220
and we'll be right back.
1504
00:53:01,220 --> 00:53:02,060
- Really?
1505
00:53:02,060 --> 00:53:02,900
- A little bit more.
1506
00:53:02,900 --> 00:53:04,100
- Yeah, hold on, you're taking a breath.
1507
00:53:04,100 --> 00:53:05,100
- Okay, let's get it.
1508
00:53:05,100 --> 00:53:05,940
- No, we need you.
1509
00:53:05,940 --> 00:53:06,940
We need to take a break.
1510
00:53:06,940 --> 00:53:08,980
I need you to take a quick break because
1511
00:53:08,980 --> 00:53:10,740
I have to set up the next thing.
1512
00:53:10,740 --> 00:53:12,540
So, it's comedy, Fred.
1513
00:53:12,540 --> 00:53:15,020
Just do three minutes about fucking t-shirts.
1514
00:53:15,020 --> 00:53:18,540
- Wack, wack, wack!
1515
00:53:18,540 --> 00:53:21,460
- Hey, you know what's in the news, ladies and gentlemen?
1516
00:53:21,460 --> 00:53:23,700
Baby Rape, let's do jokes about that.
1517
00:53:23,700 --> 00:53:25,220
(laughing)
1518
00:53:25,220 --> 00:53:26,540
That's what it felt like.
1519
00:53:26,540 --> 00:53:29,020
All right, two minute break, not even.
1520
00:53:29,020 --> 00:53:30,340
Allen's gonna tell us some jokes.
1521
00:53:30,340 --> 00:53:31,620
We'll be right back.
1522
00:53:31,620 --> 00:53:33,740
- The Black Link and Collective Podcast
1523
00:53:33,740 --> 00:53:36,700
will return after a word from our sponsors.
1524
00:53:37,700 --> 00:53:40,100
- Do your farts mean something?
1525
00:53:40,100 --> 00:53:41,940
(buzzer)
1526
00:53:41,940 --> 00:53:44,540
(upbeat music)
1527
00:53:44,540 --> 00:53:47,460
(upbeat music)
1528
00:54:13,620 --> 00:54:17,340
Welcome back to 100 music.
1529
00:54:17,340 --> 00:54:19,660
- The Black Link and Collective Podcast, Fred.
1530
00:54:19,660 --> 00:54:21,340
- We're actually helping you.
1531
00:54:21,340 --> 00:54:22,540
- He's gonna put a break in.
1532
00:54:22,540 --> 00:54:24,180
- I'll be in the game.
1533
00:54:24,180 --> 00:54:25,540
- I will almost guarantee it.
1534
00:54:25,540 --> 00:54:26,980
You did a great job switching the music,
1535
00:54:26,980 --> 00:54:28,580
the copyrighted music last week.
1536
00:54:28,580 --> 00:54:29,940
- Speaking of the great,
1537
00:54:29,940 --> 00:54:32,460
this is not that, but I do have a question about that.
1538
00:54:32,460 --> 00:54:38,940
If we were to play music generated by AI,
1539
00:54:38,940 --> 00:54:42,860
is that technically copyright infringement?
1540
00:54:42,860 --> 00:54:44,180
- No.
1541
00:54:44,180 --> 00:54:45,940
- Now I was just curious, but I was thinking about that.
1542
00:54:45,940 --> 00:54:46,780
- No, no, no, no.
1543
00:54:46,780 --> 00:54:48,620
- If it's our music, it's not.
1544
00:54:48,620 --> 00:54:49,700
- Right, right, I know if we do it,
1545
00:54:49,700 --> 00:54:51,460
but if that country song--
1546
00:54:51,460 --> 00:54:53,820
- Yeah, that would have been copyrighted, yeah.
1547
00:54:53,820 --> 00:54:56,500
- How can a machine copyright a machine?
1548
00:54:56,500 --> 00:54:57,340
- Yeah.
1549
00:54:57,340 --> 00:54:58,940
- Anyway, just curious.
1550
00:54:58,940 --> 00:55:01,700
Okay, so Fred, it's still,
1551
00:55:01,700 --> 00:55:03,860
we're just days away from Thanksgiving, Fred.
1552
00:55:03,860 --> 00:55:05,100
Thank God.
1553
00:55:05,100 --> 00:55:07,100
We've been waiting on this all year long.
1554
00:55:07,100 --> 00:55:08,740
Gobble, gobble, motherfuckers.
1555
00:55:08,740 --> 00:55:09,660
Here we go, Fred.
1556
00:55:09,660 --> 00:55:11,100
(laughing)
1557
00:55:11,100 --> 00:55:15,980
I got for you, you know Fred, it's that time of year.
1558
00:55:15,980 --> 00:55:20,340
When we all enjoy eating a little too much,
1559
00:55:20,340 --> 00:55:24,180
taking a little nap, add a few extra pounds,
1560
00:55:24,180 --> 00:55:25,220
and we just say, you know what,
1561
00:55:25,220 --> 00:55:27,100
that's just the holidays for you, baby.
1562
00:55:27,100 --> 00:55:28,940
(laughing)
1563
00:55:28,940 --> 00:55:33,900
Well, Fred, I and my friends at half and half
1564
00:55:33,900 --> 00:55:39,300
cream store have found a way to solve your holiday
1565
00:55:39,300 --> 00:55:41,340
and wait game issues, Fred.
1566
00:55:41,340 --> 00:55:42,660
- Boy, so glad.
1567
00:55:42,660 --> 00:55:44,580
- Let me tell you, and I'm telling you this now,
1568
00:55:44,580 --> 00:55:45,900
because we're a little early,
1569
00:55:45,900 --> 00:55:48,380
and this is really geared more towards Christmas,
1570
00:55:48,380 --> 00:55:49,220
because you know--
1571
00:55:49,220 --> 00:55:51,740
- Is it the throw-up steak?
1572
00:55:51,740 --> 00:55:53,420
- You wish.
1573
00:55:53,420 --> 00:55:56,420
So you would wish more than anything, that's it,
1574
00:55:56,420 --> 00:55:57,660
but it's not.
1575
00:55:57,660 --> 00:56:02,660
So Fred, me and my friends at whatever half and half
1576
00:56:02,660 --> 00:56:05,300
company there is dairy products incorporated,
1577
00:56:05,300 --> 00:56:07,460
I don't wanna call anybody out.
1578
00:56:07,460 --> 00:56:10,020
I recommend you go out today,
1579
00:56:10,020 --> 00:56:10,860
- Let's call a movie.
1580
00:56:10,860 --> 00:56:15,820
- And by yourself, a big old bucket of half and half cream,
1581
00:56:15,820 --> 00:56:18,180
and put it in your fridge and forget about it,
1582
00:56:18,180 --> 00:56:19,340
until after Christmas.
1583
00:56:19,340 --> 00:56:25,500
'Til it's day is past, it's date of expiration.
1584
00:56:25,500 --> 00:56:28,420
And then Fred, what they'd like us to do,
1585
00:56:28,420 --> 00:56:33,420
what they'd like me to tell you to do, is wake up early
1586
00:56:33,420 --> 00:56:37,220
on a Monday morning, and make yourself
1587
00:56:37,220 --> 00:56:39,300
a nice pipe and hot cup of coffee.
1588
00:56:39,300 --> 00:56:44,660
And then Fred, what you're gonna do, because it's early,
1589
00:56:44,660 --> 00:56:48,740
is you're gonna say, "Hey, I know that this half and half
1590
00:56:48,740 --> 00:56:53,660
"might be a few days past date, but I'm sure it's fine."
1591
00:56:53,660 --> 00:56:56,380
And you're not gonna smell it, no, no.
1592
00:56:56,380 --> 00:56:58,780
You're gonna put it right into your coffee.
1593
00:56:58,780 --> 00:56:59,780
(cow mooing)
1594
00:56:59,780 --> 00:57:04,780
And then your sleep-addled, strung out brain is gonna say,
1595
00:57:05,860 --> 00:57:08,980
"You know what, I'm gonna drink this coffee,
1596
00:57:08,980 --> 00:57:10,700
"and it's gonna taste great."
1597
00:57:10,700 --> 00:57:13,540
And it's gonna taste fine, it's gonna taste okay.
1598
00:57:13,540 --> 00:57:14,860
- Yeah, it's coffee.
1599
00:57:14,860 --> 00:57:15,700
- Yeah.
1600
00:57:15,700 --> 00:57:18,900
- And you're just gonna say, "Hey, you know what,
1601
00:57:18,900 --> 00:57:21,180
"it's Monday morning, maybe I just put in
1602
00:57:21,180 --> 00:57:23,740
"a little too much of something, I don't know.
1603
00:57:23,740 --> 00:57:25,580
"I don't know what's gonna happen."
1604
00:57:25,580 --> 00:57:28,180
And then you're gonna go about your business, Fred,
1605
00:57:28,180 --> 00:57:30,860
for almost exactly two and a half hours, Fred,
1606
00:57:30,860 --> 00:57:32,340
you're gonna go about your business.
1607
00:57:32,340 --> 00:57:33,340
(laughing)
1608
00:57:33,340 --> 00:57:37,420
And then, because you drank this coffee at 8 a.m., Fred.
1609
00:57:37,420 --> 00:57:39,340
- And you're gonna have to do your business.
1610
00:57:39,340 --> 00:57:42,260
- At 10.30 a.m., when you're in the middle
1611
00:57:42,260 --> 00:57:43,820
of your Monday morning meeting,
1612
00:57:43,820 --> 00:57:45,740
that is mandatory for all people.
1613
00:57:45,740 --> 00:57:49,580
All of a sudden, the world's greatest weight loss tip
1614
00:57:49,580 --> 00:57:50,500
is gonna kick in.
1615
00:57:50,500 --> 00:57:52,220
(laughing)
1616
00:57:52,220 --> 00:57:54,740
And you're gonna wish you were dead.
1617
00:57:54,740 --> 00:58:00,380
Because, Fred, that's exactly what happened to me, Fred.
1618
00:58:00,380 --> 00:58:01,540
(laughing)
1619
00:58:01,540 --> 00:58:06,540
- Just a few days ago, I was having a lucky son of a bitch
1620
00:58:06,540 --> 00:58:15,580
who was living on outside, weighing the weight that he weighs,
1621
00:58:15,580 --> 00:58:19,540
excited for things giving and food to galore to come.
1622
00:58:19,540 --> 00:58:23,340
And two and a half hours after I drank that fucking cup of coffee,
1623
00:58:23,340 --> 00:58:25,380
and I had a lot of good business to put on.
1624
00:58:25,380 --> 00:58:30,060
I experienced 24 straight hours
1625
00:58:30,900 --> 00:58:35,060
of calculating things from all the holes that nothing
1626
00:58:35,060 --> 00:58:38,900
should ejaculate from ever.
1627
00:58:38,900 --> 00:58:41,860
- Evacuate, you need to ejaculate.
1628
00:58:41,860 --> 00:58:42,780
- ejaculate.
1629
00:58:42,780 --> 00:58:43,620
(laughing)
1630
00:58:43,620 --> 00:58:45,740
'Cause I felt like I was getting fucked hard.
1631
00:58:45,740 --> 00:58:47,660
(laughing)
1632
00:58:47,660 --> 00:58:49,660
(laughing)
1633
00:58:49,660 --> 00:58:54,660
We had things coming out of every orifice.
1634
00:58:54,660 --> 00:58:55,820
- Yeah.
1635
00:58:55,820 --> 00:58:56,980
- All over the place.
1636
00:58:56,980 --> 00:58:57,980
- Oh no.
1637
00:58:57,980 --> 00:59:00,820
- It was brown water out of both ends.
1638
00:59:00,820 --> 00:59:02,140
(laughing)
1639
00:59:02,140 --> 00:59:02,980
- Oh man.
1640
00:59:02,980 --> 00:59:04,100
- Which was not ideal.
1641
00:59:04,100 --> 00:59:09,060
So, Fred, in a mere 24 hours, really 22 and a half,
1642
00:59:09,060 --> 00:59:12,140
if you don't count the part where I wasn't sick,
1643
00:59:12,140 --> 00:59:15,660
your boy dropped 10 pounds.
1644
00:59:15,660 --> 00:59:17,540
(laughing)
1645
00:59:17,540 --> 00:59:19,420
I'm not even getting.
1646
00:59:19,420 --> 00:59:20,260
- What's this?
1647
00:59:20,260 --> 00:59:21,100
- Fire?
1648
00:59:21,100 --> 00:59:24,180
- This was Monday morning.
1649
00:59:24,180 --> 00:59:25,300
- That was Monday morning.
1650
00:59:25,300 --> 00:59:26,140
- No last night.
1651
00:59:27,940 --> 00:59:29,380
- Yeah, so there you go, third.
1652
00:59:29,380 --> 00:59:31,660
- I dropped 10 pounds in one day.
1653
00:59:31,660 --> 00:59:36,020
And I dropped 12 pounds over the course of two days.
1654
00:59:36,020 --> 00:59:40,900
So, go ahead and get your half and half cream ready.
1655
00:59:40,900 --> 00:59:43,460
And now keep in mind, I also need to note to people,
1656
00:59:43,460 --> 00:59:47,580
the correct dosage of this, one tablespoon,
1657
00:59:47,580 --> 00:59:48,620
(laughing)
1658
00:59:48,620 --> 00:59:52,620
which is all I drank was one tablespoon more than that.
1659
00:59:52,620 --> 00:59:57,060
And if you go ahead and put your cream in the kitchen now,
1660
00:59:57,060 --> 00:59:59,980
it'll be ready for Christmas.
1661
00:59:59,980 --> 01:00:02,380
(laughing)
1662
01:00:02,380 --> 01:00:04,140
It'll be ready to, you know what,
1663
01:00:04,140 --> 01:00:05,420
you're gonna start the new year.
1664
01:00:05,420 --> 01:00:07,100
All your new year's resolutions are gonna,
1665
01:00:07,100 --> 01:00:09,300
if your new year's resolution is to lose 10 pounds,
1666
01:00:09,300 --> 01:00:11,860
you can get that shit done by January 2nd.
1667
01:00:11,860 --> 01:00:13,580
- Just put it in a decent state by the name,
1668
01:00:13,580 --> 01:00:14,820
put eggnog.
1669
01:00:14,820 --> 01:00:17,220
- Yeah, but don't smell.
1670
01:00:17,220 --> 01:00:19,340
(laughing)
1671
01:00:19,340 --> 01:00:24,340
And so, I'm laid up in bed like the whole day,
1672
01:00:24,340 --> 01:00:25,860
like some Monday, I was working
1673
01:00:25,860 --> 01:00:27,580
'cause I was like, I have to be at work.
1674
01:00:27,580 --> 01:00:29,340
It kicked in at like 10.30.
1675
01:00:29,340 --> 01:00:32,420
I tried to work through it because it was still mostly just,
1676
01:00:32,420 --> 01:00:34,900
it wasn't like I physically felt bad, I just had.
1677
01:00:34,900 --> 01:00:35,900
- Right, yeah.
1678
01:00:35,900 --> 01:00:37,220
- Episodes, right?
1679
01:00:37,220 --> 01:00:38,540
So I was like, it's cool.
1680
01:00:38,540 --> 01:00:41,420
I probably just, you know, maybe it was the fajitas
1681
01:00:41,420 --> 01:00:42,980
I ate last night, who knows?
1682
01:00:42,980 --> 01:00:46,740
Well, one o'clock, I was like,
1683
01:00:46,740 --> 01:00:49,260
there's no possible way I can stay in this office.
1684
01:00:49,260 --> 01:00:53,340
I'm gonna go sit in my car and just,
1685
01:00:53,340 --> 01:00:54,420
(laughing)
1686
01:00:54,420 --> 01:00:56,340
Well, I was like, yeah, I was like,
1687
01:00:56,340 --> 01:00:59,820
I'm gonna go sit in my car, turn on the AC
1688
01:00:59,820 --> 01:01:01,860
and just lay back and try to relax
1689
01:01:01,860 --> 01:01:04,700
until I have to go get the kids from school.
1690
01:01:04,700 --> 01:01:06,660
So, - Still a perfect office.
1691
01:01:06,660 --> 01:01:07,740
- Oh, dude, no.
1692
01:01:07,740 --> 01:01:08,900
- Oh, oh.
1693
01:01:08,900 --> 01:01:09,980
- Oh.
1694
01:01:09,980 --> 01:01:11,940
- So, I do that.
1695
01:01:11,940 --> 01:01:15,500
I'm in and out for a few minutes, every 15 minutes
1696
01:01:15,500 --> 01:01:16,980
or so I wake up because I'm at this point,
1697
01:01:16,980 --> 01:01:19,420
I'm like sleeping, I'm bustin' my brain,
1698
01:01:19,420 --> 01:01:21,220
I'm bright already.
1699
01:01:21,220 --> 01:01:24,060
I wake up and I'm like, oh my God, I have to shit.
1700
01:01:24,060 --> 01:01:27,020
So, like, I run back into my office,
1701
01:01:27,020 --> 01:01:29,900
not into my actual office, into the restroom of my office.
1702
01:01:29,900 --> 01:01:34,100
Do what has to be done back to the car.
1703
01:01:34,100 --> 01:01:36,980
This happened three times in like two and a half.
1704
01:01:36,980 --> 01:01:37,900
(laughing)
1705
01:01:37,900 --> 01:01:40,260
- I'm gonna show you the upstairs,
1706
01:01:40,260 --> 01:01:41,540
they placed their wager.
1707
01:01:41,540 --> 01:01:42,900
- Oh, they did, they were.
1708
01:01:42,900 --> 01:01:44,140
(laughing)
1709
01:01:44,140 --> 01:01:45,820
They didn't want an eye loss, boys.
1710
01:01:45,820 --> 01:01:50,100
So, so, then, like,
1711
01:01:50,100 --> 01:01:52,140
(laughing)
1712
01:01:52,140 --> 01:01:54,660
Every third Monday of the year,
1713
01:01:54,660 --> 01:01:56,260
I have a month, I mean,
1714
01:01:56,260 --> 01:01:58,260
I have a huge meeting, it's our management meeting,
1715
01:01:58,260 --> 01:02:00,260
I'm part of the management team for some reason.
1716
01:02:00,260 --> 01:02:03,620
And so, it's like a kind of a big deal, right?
1717
01:02:03,620 --> 01:02:05,660
Well, it's at three o'clock,
1718
01:02:05,660 --> 01:02:10,500
and I text my boss at 245, and I'm like, bro,
1719
01:02:10,500 --> 01:02:13,380
there's no way I can make this meeting.
1720
01:02:13,380 --> 01:02:14,860
And he's like, oh, why not?
1721
01:02:14,860 --> 01:02:17,020
Something come up and I'm like, yes,
1722
01:02:17,020 --> 01:02:20,060
I have thrown up five times in the parking lot
1723
01:02:20,060 --> 01:02:21,060
in the last half.
1724
01:02:21,900 --> 01:02:24,660
And he's like, cool, don't come to the meeting.
1725
01:02:24,660 --> 01:02:27,540
And I was like, great, thank you, I'm not gonna do that.
1726
01:02:27,540 --> 01:02:30,060
So, I pick the kids up.
1727
01:02:30,060 --> 01:02:32,100
Of course, my son has basketball game.
1728
01:02:32,100 --> 01:02:34,140
So, I have to go to this gym
1729
01:02:34,140 --> 01:02:38,380
and sit for two hours,
1730
01:02:38,380 --> 01:02:43,100
watching not a good brand of basketball,
1731
01:02:43,100 --> 01:02:44,180
not because of my kid,
1732
01:02:44,180 --> 01:02:45,860
because it was just what it was.
1733
01:02:45,860 --> 01:02:49,820
While every 15 to 16 minutes,
1734
01:02:49,820 --> 01:02:54,140
I'm literally running out of the gym to the bathroom
1735
01:02:54,140 --> 01:02:58,700
because I'm either throwing up or diarying everywhere.
1736
01:02:58,700 --> 01:03:01,260
So, I finally get home.
1737
01:03:01,260 --> 01:03:03,700
The kid, I don't even know how I got the kids home
1738
01:03:03,700 --> 01:03:05,060
to be honest with you.
1739
01:03:05,060 --> 01:03:07,020
But they were like, what are we gonna have for dinner, daddy,
1740
01:03:07,020 --> 01:03:08,780
blah, blah, blah, and as your dad doesn't give a shit,
1741
01:03:08,780 --> 01:03:09,860
would you be for dinner?
1742
01:03:09,860 --> 01:03:11,180
(laughing)
1743
01:03:11,180 --> 01:03:12,340
Your dad is going in.
1744
01:03:12,340 --> 01:03:15,620
Literally, I was like, I'm going into the house,
1745
01:03:15,620 --> 01:03:18,660
I'm getting in the bed, and I may never wake up.
1746
01:03:19,740 --> 01:03:23,060
So, figure it out, kids.
1747
01:03:23,060 --> 01:03:24,500
And they're like, really, dad, it?
1748
01:03:24,500 --> 01:03:29,300
And I'm like, yeah, real, 13 year old, help the other two,
1749
01:03:29,300 --> 01:03:32,460
make sure they get food that isn't poison, please.
1750
01:03:32,460 --> 01:03:33,980
And he's like, okay, I got you.
1751
01:03:33,980 --> 01:03:35,500
And so, I am, no, I don't think-
1752
01:03:35,500 --> 01:03:36,340
- You know what I'm saying?
1753
01:03:36,340 --> 01:03:37,100
- I hope you were creamer.
1754
01:03:37,100 --> 01:03:39,940
- Yeah, I have, I don't even know that.
1755
01:03:39,940 --> 01:03:40,780
- No!
1756
01:03:40,780 --> 01:03:43,060
- I'm getting honest, no idea.
1757
01:03:43,060 --> 01:03:44,540
Didn't wake up until the next morning.
1758
01:03:44,540 --> 01:03:48,620
Was in the bed by six, woke up at six in the morning,
1759
01:03:48,620 --> 01:03:50,380
feeling just as shitty as before.
1760
01:03:50,380 --> 01:03:54,820
And then by, by around lunchtime,
1761
01:03:54,820 --> 01:03:56,540
it started to kinda go away.
1762
01:03:56,540 --> 01:03:59,500
And now I'm back, back and better than ever.
1763
01:03:59,500 --> 01:04:02,260
Literally 15 pounds down in three days.
1764
01:04:02,260 --> 01:04:06,060
And just feeling my best friend.
1765
01:04:06,060 --> 01:04:08,500
- Oh, good job, man.
1766
01:04:08,500 --> 01:04:10,660
- So, I highly recommend that you visit our friends
1767
01:04:10,660 --> 01:04:13,620
and half and half, the expired half and half cream.
1768
01:04:13,620 --> 01:04:16,980
The diet trend of 2026.
1769
01:04:16,980 --> 01:04:18,980
(laughing)
1770
01:04:18,980 --> 01:04:20,700
- That's my holiday weight loss, Tim, Fred.
1771
01:04:20,700 --> 01:04:23,020
And that's our, because again,
1772
01:04:23,020 --> 01:04:26,820
the very thought of food up until today has made me
1773
01:04:26,820 --> 01:04:28,180
physically ill.
1774
01:04:28,180 --> 01:04:30,820
So that's gonna be our whole thing.
1775
01:04:30,820 --> 01:04:31,660
- Sorry.
1776
01:04:31,660 --> 01:04:32,500
- Take this week.
1777
01:04:32,500 --> 01:04:35,300
- No, you know, Fred, I feel great.
1778
01:04:35,300 --> 01:04:37,980
I can't wait to cook this fucking turkey.
1779
01:04:37,980 --> 01:04:44,980
- I'm gonna make sure it's not out of date, it's not expired.
1780
01:04:44,980 --> 01:04:47,420
I can tell you that for sure.
1781
01:04:47,420 --> 01:04:48,820
So there you go, kids.
1782
01:04:48,820 --> 01:04:51,420
That's my holiday recommendation.
1783
01:04:51,420 --> 01:04:52,420
Make it happen.
1784
01:04:52,420 --> 01:04:56,220
Don't create the expired creamer unless you wanna have fun.
1785
01:04:56,220 --> 01:04:57,060
- All right.
1786
01:04:57,060 --> 01:04:58,620
- Yeah.
1787
01:04:58,620 --> 01:05:00,020
(laughing)
1788
01:05:00,020 --> 01:05:01,020
- There you go, that's what that's all about.
1789
01:05:01,020 --> 01:05:01,860
- Happy Thanksgiving, people.
1790
01:05:01,860 --> 01:05:03,460
- Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.
1791
01:05:03,460 --> 01:05:04,500
Let's leave you with that.
1792
01:05:04,500 --> 01:05:05,860
No, hey, you know what?
1793
01:05:05,860 --> 01:05:08,340
Let's leave before really for real.
1794
01:05:08,340 --> 01:05:10,180
We gotta do a few things because, you know,
1795
01:05:10,180 --> 01:05:12,740
it is Thanksgiving, this only happens once a year.
1796
01:05:12,740 --> 01:05:15,460
And we have to just give a little shout out.
1797
01:05:15,460 --> 01:05:17,340
- Don't say anything.
1798
01:05:17,340 --> 01:05:18,180
- Good, good, good, good.
1799
01:05:18,180 --> 01:05:20,780
- No, we should make a song for Thanksgiving.
1800
01:05:20,780 --> 01:05:23,140
The only song is that I know is "Composers."
1801
01:05:23,140 --> 01:05:25,540
- Mr. What happened Thanksgiving?
1802
01:05:25,540 --> 01:05:29,420
- The Craig Bear resorts for having mashed potatoes.
1803
01:05:29,420 --> 01:05:31,700
Oh, the turkey looks great.
1804
01:05:31,700 --> 01:05:33,580
Thank you for loving me.
1805
01:05:33,580 --> 01:05:35,500
Thank you for being there.
1806
01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:37,380
Everybody's talking?
1807
01:05:37,380 --> 01:05:39,380
The whole world's talking, thank you and you.
1808
01:05:39,380 --> 01:05:41,380
Thank you and us for thanking you,
1809
01:05:41,380 --> 01:05:42,500
kill the turkey.
1810
01:05:42,500 --> 01:05:46,140
Anyway, so, no, I think we should go around real quick.
1811
01:05:46,140 --> 01:05:48,140
Let's give some things we're thankful for guys.
1812
01:05:48,140 --> 01:05:50,820
And I wanna say first, I'll go ahead and lead off the show.
1813
01:05:50,820 --> 01:05:54,740
I am thankful for all of our listeners.
1814
01:05:54,740 --> 01:05:55,740
- Thank you.
1815
01:05:55,740 --> 01:05:57,940
- All three of you.
1816
01:05:57,940 --> 01:05:58,780
Thank you.
1817
01:05:58,780 --> 01:05:59,620
- I'm thankful.
1818
01:05:59,620 --> 01:06:00,980
(laughing)
1819
01:06:00,980 --> 01:06:02,340
- Thank you, mom.
1820
01:06:02,340 --> 01:06:04,340
Thank you Uncle Gary.
1821
01:06:04,340 --> 01:06:05,340
Thank you.
1822
01:06:05,340 --> 01:06:06,180
- Well, I'm the farmer.
1823
01:06:06,180 --> 01:06:07,020
I was the farmer.
1824
01:06:07,020 --> 01:06:08,180
I forgot his name already.
1825
01:06:08,180 --> 01:06:09,020
- No.
1826
01:06:09,020 --> 01:06:12,380
- Well, I'm sorry, Rob.
1827
01:06:12,380 --> 01:06:15,340
I emptied my brains when I emptied my guts.
1828
01:06:15,340 --> 01:06:16,180
- Thank you.
1829
01:06:16,180 --> 01:06:18,500
- No, but I am thankful for all of our listeners.
1830
01:06:18,500 --> 01:06:21,820
I'm thankful that we have, once again,
1831
01:06:21,820 --> 01:06:24,460
we once again won the award for the best podcast date
1832
01:06:24,460 --> 01:06:27,180
in the upstate, which also,
1833
01:06:27,180 --> 01:06:29,500
I'm thankful that there are no other podcasts in the upstate.
1834
01:06:29,500 --> 01:06:31,620
(laughing)
1835
01:06:34,140 --> 01:06:37,700
- I'm thankful, also, I'm thankful for all of the listeners.
1836
01:06:37,700 --> 01:06:41,620
And I'm just thankful for health and strength
1837
01:06:41,620 --> 01:06:45,220
and being able to wake up every day and smile.
1838
01:06:45,220 --> 01:06:50,060
And this little opportunity to make these people laugh,
1839
01:06:50,060 --> 01:06:52,380
whoever they may be that are listening.
1840
01:06:52,380 --> 01:06:54,260
So, I'm thankful for that.
1841
01:06:54,260 --> 01:06:57,020
- Well, Sad Allen, you got anything,
1842
01:06:57,020 --> 01:06:59,020
or a friend, you got anything to say?
1843
01:06:59,020 --> 01:07:01,340
- I was really thankful for go fuck his out.
1844
01:07:01,340 --> 01:07:02,820
- That's exactly what I was gonna say.
1845
01:07:02,820 --> 01:07:03,660
I'm thankful.
1846
01:07:03,660 --> 01:07:06,540
- I'm thankful that I can tell everybody
1847
01:07:06,540 --> 01:07:07,780
to go fuck themselves.
1848
01:07:07,780 --> 01:07:10,140
- And we appreciate that as well.
1849
01:07:10,140 --> 01:07:13,300
We love you all for going and fucking yourself.
1850
01:07:13,300 --> 01:07:15,020
(laughing)
1851
01:07:15,020 --> 01:07:16,940
It's all up to these you can, kids.
1852
01:07:16,940 --> 01:07:19,900
Make sure you don't, you know, make sure you do that.
1853
01:07:19,900 --> 01:07:21,180
So there you go, ladies and gentlemen,
1854
01:07:21,180 --> 01:07:23,220
we do want to sincerely thank you guys very much
1855
01:07:23,220 --> 01:07:25,420
for all your support.
1856
01:07:25,420 --> 01:07:28,540
Feel free to send, I don't know, do something.
1857
01:07:28,540 --> 01:07:29,380
I don't fucking know.
1858
01:07:29,380 --> 01:07:31,220
- Oh, you can send that.
1859
01:07:31,220 --> 01:07:32,220
- Don't send this money.
1860
01:07:32,220 --> 01:07:33,620
- We don't want your money.
1861
01:07:33,620 --> 01:07:36,100
We don't need your money.
1862
01:07:36,100 --> 01:07:37,780
- We will fuck your money.
1863
01:07:37,780 --> 01:07:39,180
(laughing)
1864
01:07:39,180 --> 01:07:40,180
- No, we don't want it.
1865
01:07:40,180 --> 01:07:41,180
We don't need it.
1866
01:07:41,180 --> 01:07:44,540
But that's how I was saying if I was in a movie.
1867
01:07:44,540 --> 01:07:46,780
I don't want you fucking money.
1868
01:07:46,780 --> 01:07:48,700
(laughing)
1869
01:07:48,700 --> 01:07:49,860
- I'd slap it out.
1870
01:07:49,860 --> 01:07:51,300
- You know what I'm doing to say it or whatever.
1871
01:07:51,300 --> 01:07:52,300
- And then when he turns around,
1872
01:07:52,300 --> 01:07:53,780
I was picking it all up.
1873
01:07:53,780 --> 01:07:55,540
Yeah, I forgot.
1874
01:07:55,540 --> 01:07:56,860
I do have Bill's debate.
1875
01:07:56,860 --> 01:07:58,860
I do need this money.
1876
01:07:58,860 --> 01:08:01,460
(laughing)
1877
01:08:01,460 --> 01:08:04,860
- Yeah, so I'm gonna take it, but I ain't gonna smile.
1878
01:08:04,860 --> 01:08:05,820
- I'm not gonna spend it.
1879
01:08:05,820 --> 01:08:06,620
I'm not gonna spend it.
1880
01:08:06,620 --> 01:08:07,620
(laughing)
1881
01:08:07,620 --> 01:08:08,460
I'm just gonna take it.
1882
01:08:08,460 --> 01:08:11,100
I'm gonna put it into a high yield savings account.
1883
01:08:11,100 --> 01:08:12,100
- I'm gonna spend the end of it.
1884
01:08:12,100 --> 01:08:13,260
- Nothing out of my way.
1885
01:08:13,260 --> 01:08:14,100
(laughing)
1886
01:08:14,100 --> 01:08:15,260
- I'm gonna buy AMC.
1887
01:08:15,260 --> 01:08:16,420
That's what I'm gonna do.
1888
01:08:16,420 --> 01:08:18,620
- I'm really buying higher creamers.
1889
01:08:18,620 --> 01:08:20,420
(laughing)
1890
01:08:20,420 --> 01:08:23,700
- That's all your money's good for as far as I'm concerned.
1891
01:08:23,700 --> 01:08:25,100
(laughing)
1892
01:08:25,100 --> 01:08:27,820
- Well, we need to buy, we've got some tater mats
1893
01:08:27,820 --> 01:08:28,660
because you know, you got,
1894
01:08:28,660 --> 01:08:31,420
we've got the most potatoes for shoes.
1895
01:08:31,420 --> 01:08:32,420
(laughing)
1896
01:08:32,420 --> 01:08:33,420
- Right around the corner.
1897
01:08:33,420 --> 01:08:34,580
- Yep, the most potatoes.
1898
01:08:34,580 --> 01:08:36,420
- I'm gonna buy Fred to fucking internet.
1899
01:08:36,420 --> 01:08:38,500
- Yeah, that's what Fred needs.
1900
01:08:38,500 --> 01:08:41,780
- If you want Fred to sound better, please God send us money.
1901
01:08:41,780 --> 01:08:42,780
I'll give it all to Fred.
1902
01:08:42,780 --> 01:08:44,220
I'll even throw it in, honestly.
1903
01:08:44,220 --> 01:08:45,700
(laughing)
1904
01:08:45,700 --> 01:08:46,620
Like, we're cool with that.
1905
01:08:46,620 --> 01:08:48,220
I don't have a problem with that.
1906
01:08:48,220 --> 01:08:49,700
- If Fred needs to get some in it.
1907
01:08:49,700 --> 01:08:50,860
- I'm way better than I do.
1908
01:08:50,860 --> 01:08:52,620
- We had, like, we had it.
1909
01:08:52,620 --> 01:08:55,740
My wife was buying my son a phone for Christmas
1910
01:08:55,740 --> 01:08:59,940
and like, we were going to switch our phones over to the spectrum
1911
01:08:59,940 --> 01:09:03,780
and get spectrum internet and like, be hooked up.
1912
01:09:03,780 --> 01:09:07,420
And then he goes and snoops and finds the phone
1913
01:09:07,420 --> 01:09:09,700
and she's like, well, now I'm not fucking giving it to him.
1914
01:09:09,700 --> 01:09:13,140
So I'm like, come, I told him, I said, dude, I'm sorry.
1915
01:09:13,140 --> 01:09:14,100
We had it.
1916
01:09:14,100 --> 01:09:16,700
So you had the phone, you knew he was getting the phone.
1917
01:09:16,700 --> 01:09:18,540
So why would you, you know, (imitates gunfire)
1918
01:09:18,540 --> 01:09:19,380
for it?
1919
01:09:19,380 --> 01:09:22,620
So now I gotta teach him how to finagle his way.
1920
01:09:22,620 --> 01:09:23,860
- Yeah, play the game, man.
1921
01:09:23,860 --> 01:09:24,700
Come on.
1922
01:09:24,700 --> 01:09:25,700
- Yeah.
1923
01:09:25,700 --> 01:09:26,540
- Play the game.
1924
01:09:26,540 --> 01:09:27,540
- Dad knows how to play the game.
1925
01:09:27,540 --> 01:09:30,460
I will have him write his mama letter and--
1926
01:09:30,460 --> 01:09:33,140
- Oh yeah, of times, you know.
1927
01:09:33,140 --> 01:09:34,620
- Love you, mama.
1928
01:09:34,620 --> 01:09:37,300
We should have him on the show so he can do it like this.
1929
01:09:37,300 --> 01:09:38,140
She won't listen.
1930
01:09:38,140 --> 01:09:41,140
- Through the, it was like, what he's doing really?
1931
01:09:41,140 --> 01:09:42,540
Like, what are the roses?
1932
01:09:42,540 --> 01:09:44,220
You know, have him call.
1933
01:09:44,220 --> 01:09:45,580
At the beginning of the show, we showed him.
1934
01:09:45,580 --> 01:09:46,700
We showed him, we showed him.
1935
01:09:46,700 --> 01:09:48,180
(mimics gunfire)
1936
01:09:48,180 --> 01:09:50,940
- Like, mom, I just wanna let you know,
1937
01:09:50,940 --> 01:09:52,940
why are you calling me for your transfer?
1938
01:09:52,940 --> 01:09:54,940
(laughs)
1939
01:09:54,940 --> 01:09:56,700
- That's the one we are on the radio.
1940
01:09:56,700 --> 01:09:58,220
(mimics gunfire)
1941
01:09:58,220 --> 01:10:00,020
Please don't guess, ma'am, for your own.
1942
01:10:00,020 --> 01:10:01,180
(laughs)
1943
01:10:01,180 --> 01:10:02,740
- No, we'd be like, please go smoke.
1944
01:10:02,740 --> 01:10:03,900
- Right.
1945
01:10:03,900 --> 01:10:05,100
(laughs)
1946
01:10:05,100 --> 01:10:06,660
- We love it.
1947
01:10:06,660 --> 01:10:07,500
So there you go.
1948
01:10:07,500 --> 01:10:09,020
Well, I hope that you get your internet
1949
01:10:09,020 --> 01:10:11,340
because we desperately need it for the show.
1950
01:10:11,340 --> 01:10:12,340
- Yeah.
1951
01:10:12,340 --> 01:10:13,940
- And anything else, ladies and gentlemen,
1952
01:10:13,940 --> 01:10:17,140
we just hope that you're, we really hope
1953
01:10:17,140 --> 01:10:19,740
at about the 52 minute mark, you're sitting down
1954
01:10:19,740 --> 01:10:21,300
to eat a lovely turkey dinner.
1955
01:10:21,300 --> 01:10:22,140
(laughs)
1956
01:10:22,140 --> 01:10:23,460
And that's where you move,
1957
01:10:23,460 --> 01:10:25,780
and then to my turkey tails.
1958
01:10:25,780 --> 01:10:27,900
(laughs)
1959
01:10:27,900 --> 01:10:30,340
- This week's edition of "Turkey Tales."
1960
01:10:30,340 --> 01:10:32,140
- Freaky tails.
1961
01:10:32,140 --> 01:10:32,980
- That's right.
1962
01:10:32,980 --> 01:10:33,820
So,
1963
01:10:33,820 --> 01:10:35,260
- Freaky tails, oh, man.
1964
01:10:35,260 --> 01:10:36,660
- Thank you guys for everything,
1965
01:10:36,660 --> 01:10:38,180
or sincerely,
1966
01:10:38,180 --> 01:10:40,420
to my favorite holidays Thanksgiving,
1967
01:10:40,420 --> 01:10:43,420
because I get a chance to tell you all thank you.
1968
01:10:43,420 --> 01:10:45,340
So, thank you.
1969
01:10:45,340 --> 01:10:47,660
- Yeah, they're not YouTube, fuck you both.
1970
01:10:47,660 --> 01:10:49,100
But thanks to the listeners
1971
01:10:49,100 --> 01:10:50,420
and all of our fans.
1972
01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:52,260
- And all of our haters.
1973
01:10:52,260 --> 01:10:53,100
- Yeah.
1974
01:10:53,100 --> 01:10:53,940
- Thank all of them.
1975
01:10:53,940 --> 01:10:55,220
Thanks Nigel Robertson for making Fred and wanna go
1976
01:10:55,220 --> 01:10:56,060
with this thing with us.
1977
01:10:56,060 --> 01:10:56,980
- Yeah, that's right.
1978
01:10:56,980 --> 01:10:58,700
(laughs)
1979
01:10:58,700 --> 01:11:02,060
- So, the best genuine reaction I've ever heard of is you.
1980
01:11:02,060 --> 01:11:02,900
(laughs)
1981
01:11:02,900 --> 01:11:05,460
- It was better, I dropped the bite in air.
1982
01:11:05,460 --> 01:11:07,540
(laughs)
1983
01:11:07,540 --> 01:11:09,060
- He was so excited.
1984
01:11:09,060 --> 01:11:10,540
- All right, ladies and gentlemen.
1985
01:11:10,540 --> 01:11:12,260
(laughs)
1986
01:11:12,260 --> 01:11:16,500
We'll see you next week with a brand new Turkastic episode.
1987
01:11:16,500 --> 01:11:17,500
Are we doing an episode next week?
1988
01:11:17,500 --> 01:11:18,660
- Probably.
1989
01:11:18,660 --> 01:11:21,500
- We'll see with either a brand new Turkastic
1990
01:11:21,500 --> 01:11:25,180
or a brand new best of Turkastic episode.
1991
01:11:25,180 --> 01:11:27,940
- We're gonna hold up the black link and collect the pockets.
1992
01:11:27,940 --> 01:11:29,860
Can we try next time to do that and sing?
1993
01:11:29,860 --> 01:11:31,180
Let's try it again.
1994
01:11:31,180 --> 01:11:32,180
- And Fred.
1995
01:11:32,180 --> 01:11:34,420
- For a brand new episode of...
1996
01:11:34,420 --> 01:11:35,420
- Oh.
1997
01:11:35,420 --> 01:11:36,420
- A black link.
1998
01:11:36,420 --> 01:11:37,740
- I was just gonna say it all the same.
1999
01:11:37,740 --> 01:11:38,740
- I think you can like, I'm like,
2000
01:11:38,740 --> 01:11:39,580
- Oh yeah.
2001
01:11:39,580 --> 01:11:40,420
- All right.
2002
01:11:40,420 --> 01:11:41,420
- Yeah, just before we say it.
2003
01:11:41,420 --> 01:11:44,140
- Okay, let's, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna say this
2004
01:11:44,140 --> 01:11:45,500
and then go, right?
2005
01:11:45,500 --> 01:11:47,940
For a brand new episode of...
2006
01:11:47,940 --> 01:11:50,700
The black link and collect the black link and collect the
2007
01:11:50,700 --> 01:11:51,860
five things.
2008
01:11:51,860 --> 01:11:53,620
- That's how much internet Fred needs.
2009
01:11:53,620 --> 01:11:55,380
- He's seven minutes.
2010
01:11:55,380 --> 01:11:57,060
- It's fucking bullshit.
2011
01:11:57,060 --> 01:11:59,100
I am not that old, man.
2012
01:11:59,100 --> 01:11:59,940
- I am.
2013
01:11:59,940 --> 01:12:01,300
- You are that old.
2014
01:12:01,300 --> 01:12:02,300
- I am not.
2015
01:12:02,300 --> 01:12:03,980
- All right, good night everybody.
2016
01:12:03,980 --> 01:12:05,540
It's all your day, horse, man.
2017
01:12:05,540 --> 01:12:06,380
- All right.
2018
01:12:06,380 --> 01:12:07,220
- We love you.
2019
01:12:07,220 --> 01:12:08,380
- Enjoy your turkey.
2020
01:12:08,380 --> 01:12:09,380
- I'm best, man.
2021
01:12:09,380 --> 01:12:10,900
- Eat a piece of five for us.
2022
01:12:10,900 --> 01:12:11,740
- We are.
2023
01:12:11,740 --> 01:12:12,580
- Good night.
2024
01:12:12,580 --> 01:12:13,740
(laughing)
2025
01:12:13,740 --> 01:12:15,020
- And we are very good friends.
2026
01:12:15,020 --> 01:12:16,020
(laughing)
2027
01:12:16,020 --> 01:12:18,260
- Good vibes, sharing a special moment.
2028
01:12:18,260 --> 01:12:19,580
(laughing)
2029
01:12:19,580 --> 01:12:22,180
(upbeat music)
2030
01:12:22,180 --> 01:12:24,760
(upbeat music)
2031
01:12:24,760 --> 01:12:35,460
- That's it, man.
2032
01:12:35,460 --> 01:12:36,620
Game over, man.
2033
01:12:36,620 --> 01:12:37,460
It's game over.
2034
01:12:37,460 --> 01:12:40,100
- Just hang loose, blood.
2035
01:12:40,100 --> 01:12:42,500
- You're gonna catch up on the rebar, I'm gonna mess up.
2036
01:12:42,500 --> 01:12:44,020
- Get to the chopper!
2037
01:12:44,020 --> 01:12:45,820
(laughing)
2038
01:12:45,820 --> 01:12:47,940
(laughing)
2039
01:12:47,940 --> 01:12:49,180
- Oh, what a day.
2040
01:12:49,180 --> 01:12:50,540
(laughing)
2041
01:12:50,540 --> 01:12:51,860
- Come on, what is it?
2042
01:12:51,860 --> 01:12:53,340
(upbeat music)
2043
01:12:53,340 --> 01:12:55,340
- Well, thanks all folks.
2044
01:12:55,340 --> 01:12:57,820
- I still have Easter, baby.
2045
01:12:57,820 --> 01:12:58,820
- God damn it.
2046
01:12:58,820 --> 01:13:01,420
(upbeat music)
2047
01:13:01,420 --> 01:13:03,540
- I don't worry, nobody's listening anyway.
2048
01:13:03,540 --> 01:13:06,860
- As you know, I'm a man of special needs.
2049
01:13:06,860 --> 01:13:08,340
- Surely you can't be serious.
2050
01:13:08,340 --> 01:13:10,620
- I am serious and don't call me sure.
2051
01:13:10,620 --> 01:13:20,620
[BLANK_AUDIO]