In “The Ten Chocolate Commandments” | Episode 252 of The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast, the crew gets into school fundraiser chocolate, kid sales tactics, scam entrepreneurship, football season, middle school sports chaos, robot sprinters, Ray Chapman baseball history, and a deeply cursed round of Would You Rather. Parker, Fred, and Allan kick things off with no intro, a newly expanded website archive, and a hard pitch for World’s Finest Chocolate that turns into the Ten Chocolate Commandments. From there, the guys discuss kids hustling candy, door-to-door scams, football coming back, Fred’s son playing middle school football, a Tennessee teen tackling a player from the sideline, WNBA chatter, a Chinese humanoid robot outrunning Usain Bolt’s top speed, and whether John Henry died beating the machine. After the break, the crew plays Would You Rather, covering naked forest walks, underwear at work, giving up food or adult activities, AC vs. internet, glitter sneezes, mood-ring skin, bean-sized men, toe money, Jurassic survival, underwater caves, and why Parker is not a caveman. Listen now: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com
In Episode 252 of The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast, Parker opens the show by admitting he forgot to write the intro, which is honestly one of the cleaner ways a BLC episode can start. The crew celebrates the newly expanded website archive, clarifies that the site does not really look new except for one button that leads to a million other things, and then immediately shifts into the main business of the week: selling chocolate.
Parker’s daughter is selling World’s Finest Chocolate, which gives him the chance to pitch Fred and Allan like a desperate school-fundraiser middleman. The bars are smaller, more expensive, and allegedly still the world’s finest because the label says so. That turns into a full candy-hustle bit about kids buying their own supply, cold-calling family members, door-to-door sales, QR codes, and Parker realizing he is paying taxes, paying for the trip, and now paying again through chocolate. Then the crew spins the whole thing into the Ten Chocolate Commandments, a ridiculous street-sales parody about never getting high on your own supply, keeping family and business separated, watching for the chocolate police, and staying dangerous in the candy streets.
The sales talk leads to scam talk. The guys riff on kids pretending to collect donations for football teams or lawn-care businesses, the minimal investment required to look official, and the power of a clipboard, a t-shirt, and just enough confidence to make adults hand over five dollars.
Then it’s time for sports. Football is coming back, Fred’s son is starting middle school football, and the crew talks about playing on a tiny team, getting number 62 instead of Fred’s old number 55, and being thrown into a scrimmage against a private-school football program that beats them 56 to 6. That leads into a viral story about a 16-year-old girl tackling a middle school football player from the sideline, which sends the guys into jokes about family loyalty, The Waterboy, sideline justice, and why the wrong person may have been on the team.
The sports segment continues through WNBA chatter, awkward naming jokes, Usain Bolt, and a Chinese humanoid robot reportedly running faster than Bolt’s top speed. The guys compare Bolt racing the robot to John Henry battling the steam drill, then spend several minutes realizing, debating, and rediscovering that John Henry dies in the story. That somehow becomes a broader conversation about man vs. machine, old Fox TV specials, Survivor, and why fighting technology is futile. Naturally, they consider letting AI do the podcast next week.
Before the break ends, Parker brings up Ray Chapman, the Cleveland shortstop who died after being hit by a pitch in 1920, because apparently “sports” now includes tragic baseball trivia and collectible cards from the 1970s.
After the break, the crew plays Would You Rather, and the episode gets even more unhinged. The questions start with waking up naked in a forest five miles from home or in underwear at work, then move into food vs. adult activities, erasing memories, AC vs. internet, being respected vs. being elite at something nobody values, punching or talking out of situations, nervous glitter sneezes, warm maple syrup sweat, mood-ring skin, thought-whispering hair, bean-sized men, man-sized beans, toes for $500,000, dog-controlled internet, cats writing traffic laws, three years in prison vs. two weeks in the Jurassic period, and underwater cave diving.
By the end, the guys have debated survival, shame, sticky syrup, dinosaurs, toes, caves, cavemen, and whether Parker is a caveman or just a man cave. It is fundraising, football, weird sports, robot anxiety, and impossible choices in one very sticky episode.
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Fancy new seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy night suit
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A life, a life, it's a life
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Welcome to the Black Lincoln Collective Podcast
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Oh, it's gonna be fun! We can see it late, swapping mail in the stars in the morning
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I'm making fun of you
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With your most hearted
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Featuring the Celts, we sound so Fred and I'll so yell on the board
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Let's go already
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And now let's start the band show
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Welcome, welcome, one and all
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To the 250 second edition of the BLC Podcast
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Now with sales action, we'll explain that in a second
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We're probably broadcasting from the police leacy studios
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And I'm your host Parker
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And Fred's here
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I didn't write down the intro this week so I completely forgot it
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And Fred's here
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And I'm here
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And also Alan
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Yeah me too
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No, we're doing it, go keep doing it
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Okay
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Oh and check us out on YouTube
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Yeah
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Facebook, Instagram and our
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Not brand new website but newly expanded website
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With the show archive of every show that we have
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It's new and improved
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It's new and improved
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But it doesn't look new and improved, there's just one button
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Yeah
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That takes you to a million other things
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So anyway, welcome to the show ladies and gentlemen
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I'm so thankful that Fred is with us
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I'm here, Brad
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Fred, be with your brother
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ROW ROW
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Like the dungeon dragon
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Tens of the little dwarves can jump pants outside of it
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Yes, I'm here and I'm glad to be here
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And coming up next is the man who likes to dance
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The stiller white babies
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Go on, OTV
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Allegedly
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See the pro white babies
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Welcome to the show Alan
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Welcome to the show white babies everywhere
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We're so glad you could join us
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And Brad, we're here, you know
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Fred
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There comes a time of year every year
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There comes a time
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There comes a time when things have to happen, Brad
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And I told you in the beginning of the show
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Which seems like hours ago now
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That
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Oh
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Is that my heart?
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Yeah, I told you hours and hours ago Fred
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That what I had to do this week we had sales action
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So Fred, this week I'd like to pitch to you guys
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Some of the world's finest chocolate
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Oh, yeah, what do you say?
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No
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How many of these can I put you down for?
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No, they use to be the
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The world's finest chocolate
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Well Fred, the label still says it's the world's finest
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No, it's not
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And I believe it
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Even though it's significantly smaller
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So much smaller
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Back in the day
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So much smaller
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And white babies had
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Way more expensive
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One is $2
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Two bucks
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Yeah, it used to be what?
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$50
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Yeah, no, they were like a dollar I think
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They were a dollar, I thought they were a dollar
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I think they were a dollar
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Because that's the thing is
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A point of view
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But they're selling half of the money goes to the kids
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No, it don't
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That's what it says
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They don't
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On the paper they said
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They said the kids get like 15%
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They said you get a dollar, we get a dollar
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No, no
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I hope so
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They do they get a dollar and we get a dollar
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I hope so, some Fred
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One for you
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One for me
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Here's the QR code for everybody at home
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There it is
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We found a candy
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With my daughter, my young
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daughter who likes to give candy to people
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And has already bought six of these herself
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You can't eat that
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She was like, "I'll buy some damn"
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She was like, "I'll buy some damn"
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"I have some money"
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You got the t-shirt game, man
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I know, no, she's started already
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She's calling it and calls
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I got a cold calling
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And high on your own supply
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No, I know, well I told her
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You get one
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Because
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That's fair
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But you can't be buying
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We're not buying the chocolate, that's the thing
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I am already paying for the trip
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She's using the money that she gets from the time
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Right
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Do I have more chocolate?
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Yeah
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And like, "Oh, I got you dad."
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It's a perfect way for her
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She's robbing Peter to pay for all of them
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Yeah, robbing dad to pay no one
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To pay the school system
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Which I already pay taxes to
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But no, so enjoy and get some of the worlds
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Find a chocolate friend
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At your leisure
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I'll bring it by your place of business
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Go to the website, americs.com
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And fill out the form at the bottom of the home page
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And put in
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How many bars of chocolate you would like
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And I'll send them to you
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I've been in this chocolate game for you
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It made me an animal
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It's rose to the ship
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I wrote me a manual
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I stepped by stepped booklet for you to get
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Your game on track
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Not your wig push back
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No, no, no
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Never let no one know
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I'm a chocolate you hold
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Not enough
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Because you know that telebreed jealousy
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Especially
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If that man fucked up, get your ass stuck up
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Number two
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Never let them know your next move
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You making it rain
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They're gonna rain
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They're gonna rain, baby
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They're gonna always move in silence and violence
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Take it from your highness
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Now we can't fill any of these
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They're gonna rip to these cats for their bricks and chips
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For their chocolate and chips
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Never trust nobody
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Your dad will stick that ass up
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Properly gassed up
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Who did it mass up
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Shit for that fast bump
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She'd be lying in the bushes
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I like that ass up
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Damn be sure to write that
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He's going, this is off the dome
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Number four, these are about
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These are about
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These are your thoughts
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Ten chocolate commandments
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Ten chocolate related commandments
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They're still going to stay on chocolate in these streets
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In these streets
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So we got six more to go
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I'll get through them real quick
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No, no, I'm just asking
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No, no, we would like, no, it's important
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I know you heard this before
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Never get high on your own supply
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That's a recurring theme of this
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Number five
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Don't sell no chop
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Where you rest at
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I don't care if they want to out-tell them bounce
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Number six
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They got them credit, forget it
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You think a chocolate head paying you back
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Man forget it
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They'll do anything for chocolate
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Seven
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This rule is so underrated
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Keep your family and your business
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Completely separated
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That's right
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Money in blood don't mix like two dicks
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But don't shit
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I caught myself in serious shit
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Number eight
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Never keep no weight on you
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Them cast out of squeezy guns can hold gums too
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And number nine should be number one to me
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If you ain't getting bag stayed afuck from police
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The chocolate police
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The chocolate is
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If people think you're snitching
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They ain't trying to listen
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They be sitting in your kitchen waiting to start hitting
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And number ten
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A strong word called assignment
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Slippery for live men
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Not for freshmen
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If you ain't got the clientele say hell no
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Cause they ain't gonna want their money
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Waysleet hell slow
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Now if you follow these rules
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You've made mad bread to break up
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It's not 24 years on the wake up
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Slug each a temple watching frame shake up
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Caretaker did you make up
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When you passed
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Your girl fucked my man Jacob
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He's hurting three weeks
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He sniffed the whole half cake up
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He ate a whole
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(laughs)
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(laughs)
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(laughs)
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Hold on to that
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Listen
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These are my ten chocolate commandments
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You better understand it
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Hot damn it
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(laughs)
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Great job
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You both are chocolate in these three
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You better be ready
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Cause when girls count
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They're not playing it
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They'll be selling on the same block
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Right
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I agree
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The girls got so high about me
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They've already been
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They can identify each other easily
251
00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:09,500
Easily they got you
252
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:11,500
They know who's on his team
253
00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:13,500
And they know you ain't on their team
254
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:15,500
They're really new
255
00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:17,500
Freelancin
256
00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,500
Freelancin on the streets
257
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:21,500
Oh
258
00:10:21,500 --> 00:10:23,500
Gross
259
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,500
(laughs)
260
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,500
I always say I would have gotten stuck on that one
261
00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:29,500
And a sassy man
262
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:31,500
Yeah I'm saying I'm trying to
263
00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:33,500
Pedal chocolate
264
00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:35,500
To the people who don't eat chocolate
265
00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:37,500
Who the last thing they eat is chocolate through in their lives
266
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:39,500
Get a 9 million
267
00:10:39,500 --> 00:10:41,500
9 million water gun
268
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,500
Make sure
269
00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,500
That's right
270
00:10:44,500 --> 00:10:46,500
And always be on the little count for the chocolate police
271
00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:48,500
Yeah
272
00:10:48,500 --> 00:10:50,500
Cause they'll always be prowling the streets too
273
00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:52,500
Yeah
274
00:10:52,500 --> 00:10:54,500
Yeah they're selling her wares about chocolate
275
00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:56,500
Raaaaaan
276
00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:58,500
(laughs)
277
00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,500
She got a whole speech
278
00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:02,500
Raaaaaan
279
00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:04,500
Yeah I should've not
280
00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:06,500
She got a spiel
281
00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:08,500
Yeah I was like go ahead
282
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:10,500
Cause she was like I got it
283
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,500
I mean
284
00:11:12,500 --> 00:11:14,500
She knocked on the door
285
00:11:14,500 --> 00:11:16,500
And I didn't do anything
286
00:11:16,500 --> 00:11:18,500
Yeah
287
00:11:18,500 --> 00:11:20,500
And then she knocked again
288
00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:24,500
And then I was like who is it?
289
00:11:24,500 --> 00:11:26,500
We don't want any
290
00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:28,500
Don't you know the things
291
00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:30,500
I didn't buy it
292
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,500
I'll tell you that
293
00:11:32,500 --> 00:11:34,500
Except for all the ones I probably have already bought
294
00:11:34,500 --> 00:11:36,500
No I have any cares
295
00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:38,500
Yeah I'm like why would you come to a person's house?
296
00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:39,500
That's weird
297
00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:41,500
Yeah
298
00:11:41,500 --> 00:11:43,500
The school just sent out a
299
00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:45,500
A scammler
300
00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:47,500
That like some kids are going around
301
00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:49,500
Ask for donations to the football team
302
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,500
Right
303
00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:53,500
Good for them
304
00:11:53,500 --> 00:11:55,500
Good for them
305
00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:57,500
That's a minimal investment
306
00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:59,500
Some kids work
307
00:11:59,500 --> 00:12:01,500
Yeah cause like dude
308
00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:03,500
Okay so what do you got a
309
00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:05,500
25 bucks to get a t-shirt
310
00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:07,500
Get t-shirt and a clipboard
311
00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,500
You're in there
312
00:12:09,500 --> 00:12:11,500
I know I got a scamm
313
00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:13,500
That was at the little corner store
314
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,500
And these kids came up
315
00:12:15,500 --> 00:12:17,500
And they said hey we try to start a long care business
316
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:19,500
You want donate?
317
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:21,500
And I was like yeah
318
00:12:21,500 --> 00:12:23,500
I was like do I just get a scamm
319
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:25,500
But what do they have
320
00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:27,500
Did they have a scamm you like
321
00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,500
They have a lot more
322
00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:31,500
We gonna say do they have a weed wager
323
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:33,500
Like a little one of those head
324
00:12:33,500 --> 00:12:35,500
Clippers
325
00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:37,500
Yeah, they have a bunch
326
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:39,500
They didn't even have grass on their feet or anything
327
00:12:39,500 --> 00:12:41,500
Like the shoes weren't green
328
00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:43,500
Where is his ties and coats
329
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,500
(laughs)
330
00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:47,500
What's going on here business sir
331
00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:49,500
They were wearing hoodies in the summer
332
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,500
Like what?
333
00:12:51,500 --> 00:12:53,500
Oh yeah
334
00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:55,500
They're like you're gonna donate either way
335
00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,500
Right yeah
336
00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:59,500
I'd rather give you five than you take ten
337
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:01,500
You take ten
338
00:13:01,500 --> 00:13:03,500
But I also don't have ten dollars
339
00:13:03,500 --> 00:13:03,500
So you're getting five
340
00:13:03,500 --> 00:13:07,500
Well Fred, speaking of five dollars when you should have ten
341
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,500
Possibly let's find out your opinion
342
00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:11,500
Because now Fred is time for sports
343
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:13,500
Oh
344
00:13:13,500 --> 00:13:15,500
Which Alan
345
00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:17,500
New is gonna happen tonight
346
00:13:17,500 --> 00:13:19,500
I wanna buy some of that
347
00:13:19,500 --> 00:13:21,500
You didn't
348
00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:23,500
You said my other stuff am sports
349
00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:25,500
I said the other stuff was the chocolate
350
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,500
No
351
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,500
That was sales
352
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:31,500
I was selling the chocolate
353
00:13:31,500 --> 00:13:33,500
Hey, what a deal
354
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:35,500
Sports, what a deal for chocolate
355
00:13:35,500 --> 00:13:37,500
Sports and chocolate go together like
356
00:13:37,500 --> 00:13:39,500
Peanut butter and bananas
357
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:41,500
There you go
358
00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:43,500
You know, in that some people think it's okay
359
00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:47,500
So Fred, the world of sports is very enumerous
360
00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,500
Yeah, it is
361
00:13:49,500 --> 00:13:53,500
And lately there's been a lot of things that have happened
362
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,500
All over the place
363
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:57,500
What happened
364
00:13:57,500 --> 00:13:59,500
For instance Fred
365
00:13:59,500 --> 00:13:59,500
Soon, football will be back
366
00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:01,500
In the world
367
00:14:01,500 --> 00:14:03,500
And you've graciously given me a ticket
368
00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:05,500
To a game next week
369
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:07,500
I haven't given it to you yet
370
00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:09,500
But you have
371
00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:11,500
You've told me you were gonna give it to me
372
00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,500
I am
373
00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:15,500
So I'm very excited to take my children
374
00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:17,500
Into the swerth of the re-heat
375
00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:19,500
For hours
376
00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,500
Yes
377
00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:23,500
That's gonna be great
378
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:25,500
How do you do me
379
00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:27,500
When football comes back
380
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,500
When football comes back
381
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:33,500
For now anyway before global warming kicks in a little harder
382
00:14:33,500 --> 00:14:35,500
We are
383
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,500
It means that falls on the way
384
00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:39,500
It is man, the fall, love it
385
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:41,500
And then I started thinking about pumpkin spice
386
00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:43,500
No, I don't
387
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:45,500
I don't start thinking about pumpkin spice
388
00:14:45,500 --> 00:14:47,500
I thought that was a spice girl
389
00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:49,500
That would be that
390
00:14:49,500 --> 00:14:51,500
That would be the
391
00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:53,500
Chubbier than one that made this real life
392
00:14:53,500 --> 00:14:55,500
Yeah
393
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:57,500
That was baby spice
394
00:14:57,500 --> 00:14:59,500
It was married to Jack Warner
395
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,500
Yeah
396
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:03,500
What are you most looking forward to about football?
397
00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:05,500
Yeah, sports
398
00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:07,500
And looking forward to
399
00:15:07,500 --> 00:15:09,500
Sports
400
00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:11,500
My son is this is first year playing middle school
401
00:15:11,500 --> 00:15:13,500
Ah, okay
402
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:15,500
Yeah, the first scrim is today
403
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:17,500
Uh-oh, what's he playing
404
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,500
Playing football
405
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:21,500
Oh, do you think we can see that
406
00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:23,500
Correct
407
00:15:23,500 --> 00:15:25,500
Position might he be playing
408
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:27,500
He's playing guard and tackle
409
00:15:27,500 --> 00:15:29,500
There's only 15 kids on the team
410
00:15:29,500 --> 00:15:31,500
Oh, okay
411
00:15:31,500 --> 00:15:35,500
Which is great because he's going to the same school that I did
412
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:37,500
Playing on your legacy
413
00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:39,500
Playing on my legacy
414
00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:41,500
I was hoping he would get my number but he did
415
00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:43,500
I was 55
416
00:15:43,500 --> 00:15:45,500
And he got 62
417
00:15:45,500 --> 00:15:47,500
So close
418
00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:49,500
So close, yeah
419
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:51,500
First guy that came out, we got 55
420
00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:53,500
I was like, hey man
421
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:55,500
Maybe next year
422
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:57,500
But their numbers
423
00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:59,500
You don't let them pick their numbers
424
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:01,500
Yeah, but the guy that went first picked 55
425
00:16:01,500 --> 00:16:05,500
Yeah, yeah, he got 55 so he couldn't get it
426
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,500
Everybody wants 55
427
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:09,500
They had that first scrimmage today
428
00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:15,500
And they were playing a little school up here called Southside Christian
429
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,500
Oh, are they in that league?
430
00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:19,500
Well, no, I think it was just like
431
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,500
Completely coached, yeah, it's a scrimmage
432
00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,500
Yeah, so it was like
433
00:16:23,500 --> 00:16:25,500
The rich white kids were like honest
434
00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:27,500
Yeah, they were like, hey
435
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:31,500
Let us beat up on your little country team
436
00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:33,500
Right, I'm with them
437
00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:35,500
Yeah, and that's probably exactly what they did
438
00:16:35,500 --> 00:16:37,500
Because those guys is not a football team
439
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:39,500
That is a football program
440
00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:43,500
Yeah, they run from like eight or eight years old to
441
00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:45,500
Through high school
442
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:47,500
Through high school, yeah
443
00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:49,500
You got to work out for you
444
00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:51,500
They got your private school, right?
445
00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:55,500
Yeah, they got whooped up 56 to 6
446
00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:59,500
Like, my son had a couple tackles
447
00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:01,500
Yeah, I mean, one of the regular people
448
00:17:01,500 --> 00:17:03,500
Just thought they would be playing other culture bum schools
449
00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,500
Yeah, one would hope
450
00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:07,500
Yeah
451
00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:11,500
But 15 kids, man, that's not a lot of team
452
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:13,500
One or two injuries in the single run
453
00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:17,500
It was the same way with me, like
454
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:19,500
I think we had like 14
455
00:17:19,500 --> 00:17:21,500
And everybody had to play
456
00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:23,500
Yeah, everybody I was a damn iron man
457
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:25,500
I throw a football over that mountain over there
458
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:27,500
I threw it over that mountain over there
459
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:29,500
I remember that
460
00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:31,500
The mountain is the lower end of the great court
461
00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:33,500
I throw a football over the mountains of lower end
462
00:17:33,500 --> 00:17:37,500
So, while we're on the subject
463
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:39,500
Middle school football
464
00:17:39,500 --> 00:17:41,500
Uh-oh
465
00:17:41,500 --> 00:17:45,500
A teen has been charged
466
00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:47,500
After tackling
467
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,500
Middle Tennessee football player
468
00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:51,500
During middle school game
469
00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:53,500
What? Yeah
470
00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:55,500
So
471
00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:57,500
Yeah
472
00:17:57,500 --> 00:17:59,500
Now, this, the game is going on
473
00:17:59,500 --> 00:18:01,500
Okay, yeah, give us a little
474
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,500
Yeah, we'll tell you what happened
475
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:05,500
Go ahead and look it up because I won't just see this video
476
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:07,500
Because when I tell you what happened
477
00:18:07,500 --> 00:18:09,500
You're gonna be like, what's the point?
478
00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:11,500
The person who had a tackle, let's put it down
479
00:18:11,500 --> 00:18:13,500
You tell us
480
00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:15,500
So, the game is going on
481
00:18:15,500 --> 00:18:17,500
And then there was a scruff
482
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,500
Between two players from the opposite teams
483
00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:21,500
Okay
484
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:23,500
Off the sideline
485
00:18:23,500 --> 00:18:27,500
Okay, here comes a 16 year old girl
486
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:29,500
Oh man
487
00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:31,500
Hold on, let's see
488
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:33,500
Pop
489
00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:35,500
Like, oh, the seed game
490
00:18:35,500 --> 00:18:37,500
That dude, oh, she laid that guy
491
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,500
Yeah, let's go see you at a tackle
492
00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:41,500
See, no one has taken the seed
493
00:18:41,500 --> 00:18:43,500
The wrong person was on the team
494
00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:45,500
Yeah, she laid it but it's folded everything
495
00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:47,500
Yeah, I mean
496
00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:49,500
Speared that dude, man
497
00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:51,500
Let's put it on here for the kids
498
00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,500
Yeah, all right, tell me when it's on Alan
499
00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:55,500
Because I can't
500
00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:57,500
It's on
501
00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,500
All right, here we go
502
00:18:59,500 --> 00:19:01,500
It was caught on video
503
00:19:01,500 --> 00:19:03,500
Just keep watching here right there
504
00:19:03,500 --> 00:19:05,500
Oh damn, she's a senior
505
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:07,500
Okay, she went for it
506
00:19:07,500 --> 00:19:09,500
Yeah, we're not going to talk to this man
507
00:19:09,500 --> 00:19:11,500
Maybe I'm a good boyfriend
508
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:13,500
Yeah, who knows
509
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,500
He needs to break up with her because she's a senior
510
00:19:15,500 --> 00:19:17,500
Was there a reason that they give a reason?
511
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:19,500
They didn't give a reason, I mean
512
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:23,500
Maybe, people in speculating maybe it was her brother, maybe it was a boyfriend
513
00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:25,500
Yeah, I'm saying so
514
00:19:25,500 --> 00:19:29,500
It was local, she's 16, so 16th high school
515
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:31,500
She's probably a good boy
516
00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:33,500
Oh yeah, that's true
517
00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:33,500
Yeah, I'm saying so it was probably a good boy
518
00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:33,500
But did she heard the guy?
519
00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:35,500
No, it was in full pay
520
00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:37,500
I was surprised you heard this
521
00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:39,500
Because she can't
522
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:43,500
This is probably the greatest moment of his life
523
00:19:43,500 --> 00:19:45,500
My sister really does love me
524
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:47,500
It wasn't a sister, I know
525
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:49,500
I think it was somebody that tackled her brother
526
00:19:49,500 --> 00:19:51,500
Have you seen this movie?
527
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:53,500
There's an indie movie
528
00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:55,500
Red
529
00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:57,500
That you've probably never heard of
530
00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,500
Alan may have heard of it because he watches weird shit like this
531
00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:01,500
It's called
532
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:03,500
The Wittwa
533
00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:05,500
The Wittwa
534
00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:07,500
Yeah, and it's got a man
535
00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:09,500
Countryman
536
00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:11,500
That plays
537
00:20:11,500 --> 00:20:15,500
The football for the first time
538
00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:17,500
And in that movie
539
00:20:17,500 --> 00:20:19,500
The Wittwa
540
00:20:19,500 --> 00:20:21,500
There's
541
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:22,500
The Wittwa
542
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:23,500
There's a person
543
00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:27,500
Who gets very angry when that man is mistreated
544
00:20:27,500 --> 00:20:29,500
And threatens people with knives
545
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:31,500
And threatens people with knives
546
00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,500
Oh, man
547
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:35,500
It's played by Farooza Bulk
548
00:20:35,500 --> 00:20:37,500
Farooza Bulk
549
00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:39,500
Think that's who it is
550
00:20:39,500 --> 00:20:41,500
Right?
551
00:20:41,500 --> 00:20:42,500
Never heard of Fisbe
552
00:20:42,500 --> 00:20:44,500
You never heard of Waterboy?
553
00:20:44,500 --> 00:20:46,500
It's a Bulk
554
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:47,500
What?
555
00:20:47,500 --> 00:20:49,500
The Wattwa
556
00:20:49,500 --> 00:20:51,500
Yeah, what do you say?
557
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,500
You didn't say the Wattwa
558
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:55,500
The Wattwa
559
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:57,500
So yeah, but yeah
560
00:20:57,500 --> 00:21:01,500
Just like that, it could have been a situation where her brother got tackled
561
00:21:01,500 --> 00:21:03,500
And she was like
562
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:05,500
No!
563
00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:11,500
And then even though that kid got tackled, he was probably like this is the greatest moment of my 12-year-old life
564
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:13,500
Yeah, it was her brother
565
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,500
And it'd be her brother
566
00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:17,500
Yeah, it was her brother, Jens
567
00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:19,500
But like at the same time, you can't do that
568
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:21,500
Did he play, did he do something dirty?
569
00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:23,500
What happened? Why would she tackle it?
570
00:21:23,500 --> 00:21:25,500
That's what I don't understand
571
00:21:25,500 --> 00:21:29,500
The kid was not the same as your brother on the floor
572
00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:31,500
That's what I'm saying
573
00:21:31,500 --> 00:21:33,500
Another player on his team
574
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,500
To get into a scruffle
575
00:21:35,500 --> 00:21:37,500
Don't, don't
576
00:21:37,500 --> 00:21:39,500
Right, right, don't make your sister do it
577
00:21:39,500 --> 00:21:41,500
Right, yeah, that's not, that's not what
578
00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:43,500
But I'm sure the little boy wasn't like, "Hey, sis"
579
00:21:43,500 --> 00:21:45,500
Yeah, man
580
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:47,500
No, man, she was probably just pissed
581
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:49,500
She probably had been
582
00:21:49,500 --> 00:21:51,500
Better emotions get the best over
583
00:21:51,500 --> 00:21:53,500
Yeah, she's probably been, she's probably vaping
584
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:55,500
It is frankly county Tennessee
585
00:21:55,500 --> 00:21:57,500
So, yeah, I want you start
586
00:21:57,500 --> 00:21:59,500
I want you start down that pathway of drugs
587
00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:01,500
It's 16 and you're done
588
00:22:01,500 --> 00:22:03,500
It's cold country right there
589
00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:05,500
That's the red picture of that
590
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:07,500
That's the red picture of that red picture
591
00:22:07,500 --> 00:22:09,500
Yep, yeah, red picture of that red picture
592
00:22:09,500 --> 00:22:11,500
Well Fred, speaking of people who don't, you don't want to
593
00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:13,500
Eff around with Fred
594
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:15,500
The WMBA has been in the news
595
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:17,500
Oh
596
00:22:17,500 --> 00:22:19,500
By the way, he plays the music because it's sports
597
00:22:19,500 --> 00:22:21,500
Is it sports?
598
00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:23,500
I didn't hit it the first time
599
00:22:23,500 --> 00:22:25,500
I didn't hit it the first time
600
00:22:25,500 --> 00:22:27,500
No, I didn't hit it
601
00:22:27,500 --> 00:22:29,500
I didn't hit it the first time
602
00:22:29,500 --> 00:22:31,500
Chocolate
603
00:22:31,500 --> 00:22:33,500
Chocolate for me
604
00:22:33,500 --> 00:22:35,500
So, uh, I got a reply
605
00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:37,500
The world greatest chocolate
606
00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:39,500
This sports segment is sponsored
607
00:22:39,500 --> 00:22:41,500
But the world is fine with chocolate
608
00:22:41,500 --> 00:22:43,500
Hey, you can't prove it's not
609
00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:45,500
Yeah, you can
610
00:22:45,500 --> 00:22:47,500
You just have a bite out of it
611
00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:49,500
Well, it doesn't matter, he's already paid
612
00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:49,500
That's all that really matters
613
00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:53,500
Well Fred, the world, speaking of the world
614
00:22:53,500 --> 00:22:57,500
And the world's finest, some of the world's finest women's basketball players
615
00:22:57,500 --> 00:23:01,500
Participate in a little game called basketball
616
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:05,500
In a little league, that's how you know that they're basketball players
617
00:23:05,500 --> 00:23:07,500
Okay
618
00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:09,500
In a little league called the WMBA
619
00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:11,500
WM
620
00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:15,500
And you were telling me you wanted to talk about one of the NBA's
621
00:23:15,500 --> 00:23:19,500
Star's, right? She's a starlet? She's a hot up and coming right now
622
00:23:19,500 --> 00:23:21,500
Yeah, I'm just saying she's getting a lot of, uh,
623
00:23:21,500 --> 00:23:23,500
Yeah, she's getting a lot of, all right
624
00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:25,500
How old is this person?
625
00:23:25,500 --> 00:23:31,500
I don't know, she's got to be in her early 20s
626
00:23:31,500 --> 00:23:33,500
I'm pretty proud
627
00:23:33,500 --> 00:23:35,500
We're talking about, uh,
628
00:23:35,500 --> 00:23:37,500
Sophie cutting in
629
00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:39,500
Are you gonna win?
630
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:41,500
We
631
00:23:41,500 --> 00:23:43,500
We knew that that's what we were gonna call it
632
00:23:43,500 --> 00:23:45,500
We knew that that's what we were gonna call it out
633
00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:47,500
Yeah, we knew
634
00:23:47,500 --> 00:23:49,500
We had to do the
635
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:51,500
Yeah
636
00:23:51,500 --> 00:23:53,500
She's 30 years old
637
00:23:53,500 --> 00:23:55,500
She's 30, yeah, and so she's been around
638
00:23:55,500 --> 00:23:57,500
You don't tell me she's
639
00:23:57,500 --> 00:24:01,500
But yes, Alan, quick, making this that weird joke
640
00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:03,500
I want nothing made me talk about
641
00:24:03,500 --> 00:24:05,500
Well, what did you think she was?
642
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:09,500
(Laughter)
643
00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:11,500
Well Fred
644
00:24:11,500 --> 00:24:13,500
I thought she's making this
645
00:24:13,500 --> 00:24:17,500
I don't know, yeah, I thought she was 14
646
00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,500
No, well I knew
647
00:24:19,500 --> 00:24:21,500
But like even if she was like 22
648
00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:23,500
You would feel uncomfortable
649
00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:25,500
Half your age plus seven is the rules I understand
650
00:24:25,500 --> 00:24:27,500
Hey, are you muscle?
651
00:24:27,500 --> 00:24:29,500
Oh, I mean that's the rules
652
00:24:29,500 --> 00:24:31,500
That's the muscle thing
653
00:24:31,500 --> 00:24:33,500
Oh really?
654
00:24:33,500 --> 00:24:35,500
Is that for real? I thought that was just like
655
00:24:35,500 --> 00:24:37,500
You told me that one time
656
00:24:37,500 --> 00:24:41,500
It's like they said it's the perfect age for Muslim life
657
00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:43,500
Oh, well
658
00:24:43,500 --> 00:24:45,500
Yeah
659
00:24:45,500 --> 00:24:47,500
I wasn't aware of that so I guess I'm wrong
660
00:24:47,500 --> 00:24:49,500
I don't know
661
00:24:49,500 --> 00:24:51,500
Are you out looking for a Muslim life Fred?
662
00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:52,500
I'm not, I mean I didn't
663
00:24:52,500 --> 00:24:55,500
I didn't watch "Moggle Mix" so like
664
00:24:55,500 --> 00:24:57,500
So you know that could change some things
665
00:24:57,500 --> 00:24:59,500
I know, you know
666
00:24:59,500 --> 00:25:01,500
Footballs, man
667
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,500
So
668
00:25:03,500 --> 00:25:05,500
You know who's saying both
669
00:25:05,500 --> 00:25:07,500
Yeah, I've heard of him
670
00:25:07,500 --> 00:25:09,500
He's not like that, he's a male runner
671
00:25:09,500 --> 00:25:11,500
Yeah
672
00:25:11,500 --> 00:25:13,500
We're definitely cutting that
673
00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:15,500
That guy's all man
674
00:25:15,500 --> 00:25:17,500
That's a little guy
675
00:25:17,500 --> 00:25:19,500
He's saying both crazy that he would win back once
676
00:25:19,500 --> 00:25:21,500
Yeah
677
00:25:21,500 --> 00:25:25,500
Or he just, the gun would hit
678
00:25:25,500 --> 00:25:27,500
He'd be celebrating even before the game
679
00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:29,500
He'd already been yelling
680
00:25:29,500 --> 00:25:33,500
He's not gonna, uh, he wouldn't be doing that in this race
681
00:25:33,500 --> 00:25:39,500
Because the Chinese have developed a humanoid robot named Superman
682
00:25:39,500 --> 00:25:41,500
Oh, that's right
683
00:25:41,500 --> 00:25:43,500
That should be a man
684
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,500
As you know
685
00:25:45,500 --> 00:25:47,500
As you know
686
00:25:47,500 --> 00:25:49,500
That's right
687
00:25:49,500 --> 00:25:51,500
That's right
688
00:25:51,500 --> 00:25:55,500
Who has a pass who's saying both world record of
689
00:25:55,500 --> 00:25:59,500
12.42 meters per second
690
00:25:59,500 --> 00:26:01,500
By running at 12.66 meters per second
691
00:26:01,500 --> 00:26:03,500
Oh
692
00:26:03,500 --> 00:26:05,500
Roughly 28 miles an hour
693
00:26:05,500 --> 00:26:07,500
And like this robot was running so fancy
694
00:26:07,500 --> 00:26:09,500
Good stuff
695
00:26:09,500 --> 00:26:11,500
Right right right to the wall
696
00:26:11,500 --> 00:26:13,500
Right to the robot
697
00:26:13,500 --> 00:26:15,500
Yeah the robot
698
00:26:15,500 --> 00:26:17,500
Barely beat his time
699
00:26:17,500 --> 00:26:19,500
Right
700
00:26:19,500 --> 00:26:21,500
But this is probably just like
701
00:26:21,500 --> 00:26:23,500
The first robot
702
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:25,500
Superman
703
00:26:25,500 --> 00:26:27,500
Mark three
704
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:29,500
Yeah, I'm saying like
705
00:26:29,500 --> 00:26:31,500
Rocket boosters up his ass
706
00:26:31,500 --> 00:26:33,500
Yeah, but that was what I mean
707
00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:35,500
And I mean the straighters that still, who say both so fucking fast
708
00:26:35,500 --> 00:26:37,500
Right
709
00:26:37,500 --> 00:26:39,500
That a robot
710
00:26:39,500 --> 00:26:41,500
Yeah, I wonder
711
00:26:41,500 --> 00:26:43,500
Well, I guess he couldn't
712
00:26:43,500 --> 00:26:45,500
Because he broke that record in what like
713
00:26:45,500 --> 00:26:47,500
Well, like race the robot
714
00:26:47,500 --> 00:26:49,500
Yeah, he couldn't race the robot now
715
00:26:49,500 --> 00:26:51,500
No, if he was in his prime though
716
00:26:51,500 --> 00:26:53,500
Yeah, if he was in his prime, I would like to see that
717
00:26:53,500 --> 00:26:57,500
It would kind of put me, uh, what's my man, uh
718
00:26:57,500 --> 00:26:59,500
John Henry
719
00:26:59,500 --> 00:27:01,500
Yeah, like John Henry
720
00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:03,500
Yeah, but John Henry beat that
721
00:27:03,500 --> 00:27:05,500
He was very bold
722
00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:07,500
He beat that machine, didn't he
723
00:27:07,500 --> 00:27:09,500
John Henry, yeah, but he died in the process
724
00:27:09,500 --> 00:27:11,500
Yeah, dude
725
00:27:11,500 --> 00:27:13,500
Yeah, dude
726
00:27:13,500 --> 00:27:15,500
That's the whole story
727
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:17,500
No, he didn't die
728
00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:19,500
I think that he did
729
00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:21,500
I don't think so
730
00:27:21,500 --> 00:27:23,500
Well, I don't know if he died beating the robot
731
00:27:23,500 --> 00:27:25,500
I feel like he died doing the
732
00:27:25,500 --> 00:27:29,500
Uh, beating the robot
733
00:27:29,500 --> 00:27:31,500
He did
734
00:27:31,500 --> 00:27:33,500
All right, spoiler
735
00:27:33,500 --> 00:27:35,500
I'm the race
736
00:27:35,500 --> 00:27:37,500
Spoiler
737
00:27:37,500 --> 00:27:39,500
I didn't know he died
738
00:27:39,500 --> 00:27:41,500
Yeah, that's what made him like he gave everything he had
739
00:27:41,500 --> 00:27:43,500
Yeah
740
00:27:43,500 --> 00:27:45,500
I didn't know he died
741
00:27:45,500 --> 00:27:47,500
Oh, yeah, I just wanted to fight a gorilla
742
00:27:47,500 --> 00:27:49,500
And his prime
743
00:27:49,500 --> 00:27:51,500
He didn't even wanted to fight a gorilla his prime
744
00:27:51,500 --> 00:27:53,500
But as you keep it, it was like
745
00:27:53,500 --> 00:27:55,500
Dude, dude
746
00:27:55,500 --> 00:27:57,500
You can't do that, yeah
747
00:27:57,500 --> 00:27:59,500
You can't do that, you can't do that
748
00:27:59,500 --> 00:28:01,500
Yeah, there's music
749
00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:05,500
What better way to die than to fight in a gorilla?
750
00:28:05,500 --> 00:28:07,500
Yeah, now he's like, I'm glad I didn't
751
00:28:07,500 --> 00:28:09,500
He should be
752
00:28:09,500 --> 00:28:15,500
Yeah, so several locations have been put forth for the tunnel on which John Henry died
753
00:28:15,500 --> 00:28:19,500
So that's the whole thing, man, as he went up against the steam machine
754
00:28:19,500 --> 00:28:21,500
And then the steam machine was just like, oh, I'll go do it again
755
00:28:21,500 --> 00:28:23,500
Yeah, I can do this a hundred times
756
00:28:23,500 --> 00:28:25,500
Yeah, the steam machine was like
757
00:28:25,500 --> 00:28:29,500
And the 90s or in the 2000s that they did the man versus
758
00:28:29,500 --> 00:28:31,500
Animal or something, remember the midgets?
759
00:28:31,500 --> 00:28:33,500
Yeah, like where they raised the guy
760
00:28:33,500 --> 00:28:35,500
And like raceachita
761
00:28:35,500 --> 00:28:37,500
Yeah, and Fox
762
00:28:37,500 --> 00:28:39,500
And then yeah, and Fox in the head of the midgets
763
00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:41,500
And then midgets pulling an airplane
764
00:28:41,500 --> 00:28:43,500
Yeah, yeah, like how many midgets
765
00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:45,500
Yeah, no, you're right, I do remember
766
00:28:45,500 --> 00:28:47,500
Not a people
767
00:28:47,500 --> 00:28:49,500
No, back then you could say midgets
768
00:28:49,500 --> 00:28:51,500
That's the key he was good, man
769
00:28:51,500 --> 00:28:53,500
Right, when they didn't care
770
00:28:53,500 --> 00:28:55,500
And you just watched it
771
00:28:55,500 --> 00:28:57,500
Yeah, there was no streaming
772
00:28:57,500 --> 00:28:59,500
So it was just like, you just had to watch it
773
00:28:59,500 --> 00:29:03,500
Because you were at the house and we were made at effort to everybody
774
00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:05,500
Yeah, because we were like, what's going to happen?
775
00:29:05,500 --> 00:29:07,500
They're going to be a man
776
00:29:07,500 --> 00:29:09,500
We thought a man would fight a bear
777
00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:11,500
That was my hope the whole time
778
00:29:11,500 --> 00:29:13,500
Just like when we watched Survivor
779
00:29:13,500 --> 00:29:15,500
Because I hope the whole time that someone would die
780
00:29:15,500 --> 00:29:17,500
Because I'm like, what if tonight, tonight?
781
00:29:17,500 --> 00:29:19,500
Because you couldn't watch it later
782
00:29:19,500 --> 00:29:21,500
Yeah, no, yeah
783
00:29:21,500 --> 00:29:23,500
So if somebody died on Survivor, it was like, and nobody ever died
784
00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:25,500
They should have
785
00:29:25,500 --> 00:29:27,500
No one ever died on Survivor
786
00:29:27,500 --> 00:29:29,500
But
787
00:29:29,500 --> 00:29:31,500
Okay, they don't need to
788
00:29:31,500 --> 00:29:33,500
But yeah, so
789
00:29:33,500 --> 00:29:35,500
John Henry RIP
790
00:29:35,500 --> 00:29:37,500
Yeah, that's great, I didn't know he died
791
00:29:37,500 --> 00:29:39,500
John Henry
792
00:29:39,500 --> 00:29:41,500
Yeah, that's great
793
00:29:41,500 --> 00:29:43,500
I didn't know he died
794
00:29:43,500 --> 00:29:45,500
John Henry, in front of the show
795
00:29:45,500 --> 00:29:47,500
He is from the show, man
796
00:29:47,500 --> 00:29:49,500
Yeah, because he fought against technology
797
00:29:49,500 --> 00:29:51,500
And he proves
798
00:29:51,500 --> 00:29:53,500
That it's futile to fight against technology
799
00:29:53,500 --> 00:29:55,500
That's right
800
00:29:55,500 --> 00:29:59,500
Which is why next week, we'll be totally AI
801
00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:01,500
Yeah, we hear on it
802
00:30:01,500 --> 00:30:03,500
We should do one show at AI show
803
00:30:03,500 --> 00:30:05,500
Oh, we could probably do that
804
00:30:05,500 --> 00:30:07,500
To AI
805
00:30:07,500 --> 00:30:09,500
To listen to all that episode
806
00:30:09,500 --> 00:30:11,500
Listen to all that episode and do it
807
00:30:11,500 --> 00:30:13,500
No problem
808
00:30:13,500 --> 00:30:15,500
I'll do that right now
809
00:30:15,500 --> 00:30:19,500
You guys talk, you guys fill for the next 30 minutes
810
00:30:19,500 --> 00:30:21,500
So, yeah, we'll Fred
811
00:30:21,500 --> 00:30:23,500
Oh, I can do one more
812
00:30:23,500 --> 00:30:25,500
All right, what you got? One more sports
813
00:30:25,500 --> 00:30:27,500
And this is back in the day
814
00:30:27,500 --> 00:30:29,500
1920
815
00:30:29,500 --> 00:30:31,500
Oh, my God
816
00:30:31,500 --> 00:30:33,500
Friends, I've been holding on to this one
817
00:30:33,500 --> 00:30:35,500
For a hundred and six years
818
00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,500
I've been holding on to this one
819
00:30:37,500 --> 00:30:39,500
No, because like, you know
820
00:30:39,500 --> 00:30:41,500
Card collecting is a thing
821
00:30:41,500 --> 00:30:43,500
That's a big deal
822
00:30:43,500 --> 00:30:45,500
Yeah, yeah
823
00:30:45,500 --> 00:30:47,500
This is a very rare card to have
824
00:30:47,500 --> 00:30:49,500
Of this guy named Ray Chapman
825
00:30:49,500 --> 00:30:51,500
Ray Chapman, yeah
826
00:30:51,500 --> 00:30:53,500
Ray Chapman, you know who Ray Chapman was?
827
00:30:53,500 --> 00:30:55,500
Third baseman for the milwaki bedougadels
828
00:30:55,500 --> 00:30:57,500
No
829
00:30:57,500 --> 00:30:59,500
He was a fourth chair
830
00:30:59,500 --> 00:31:01,500
Ray Chapman, yeah
831
00:31:01,500 --> 00:31:05,500
I knew Ray Chapman, and he was a picture for the Yankees
832
00:31:05,500 --> 00:31:07,500
That reate, Ray Chapman
833
00:31:07,500 --> 00:31:11,500
Yeah, he didn't, you know, uh, sing ghost busters
834
00:31:11,500 --> 00:31:13,500
I remember him
835
00:31:13,500 --> 00:31:15,500
I remember when, oh Ray Barker
836
00:31:15,500 --> 00:31:19,500
I remember in 1920 when he pitched for the Yankees
837
00:31:19,500 --> 00:31:23,500
Well, there's a card from the 70s
838
00:31:23,500 --> 00:31:25,500
Okay, what? Okay
839
00:31:25,500 --> 00:31:27,500
A flier series
840
00:31:27,500 --> 00:31:31,500
Of this man Ray Chapman
841
00:31:31,500 --> 00:31:35,500
It's very rare card, Ray Chapman was in a very good ball player
842
00:31:35,500 --> 00:31:39,500
Ray Chapman
843
00:31:39,500 --> 00:31:41,500
Is a man that
844
00:31:41,500 --> 00:31:45,500
Dunned something in baseball that no one else has ever done
845
00:31:45,500 --> 00:31:47,500
Grinigate
846
00:31:47,500 --> 00:31:49,500
What's it guess?
847
00:31:49,500 --> 00:31:51,500
Yes, who's on the field?
848
00:31:51,500 --> 00:31:53,500
He didn't, who's on the field
849
00:31:53,500 --> 00:31:55,500
He had a
850
00:31:55,500 --> 00:31:59,500
A triple play in a home run
851
00:31:59,500 --> 00:32:01,500
He had, I say
852
00:32:01,500 --> 00:32:05,500
He, oh, he struck out on four strikes
853
00:32:05,500 --> 00:32:07,500
Yeah
854
00:32:07,500 --> 00:32:09,500
That would be amazing
855
00:32:09,500 --> 00:32:11,500
That's a thing
856
00:32:11,500 --> 00:32:13,500
But no
857
00:32:13,500 --> 00:32:17,500
Ray Chapman is the first and only man
858
00:32:17,500 --> 00:32:19,500
To ever die in a baseball game
859
00:32:19,500 --> 00:32:21,500
Oh no
860
00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:23,500
Yeah
861
00:32:23,500 --> 00:32:27,500
Thankfully baseball's first fatality was it one and only
862
00:32:27,500 --> 00:32:29,500
And protective equipment developed since hands
863
00:32:29,500 --> 00:32:31,500
Prevented and a reoccurrence
864
00:32:31,500 --> 00:32:33,500
Oh, he died from baseball
865
00:32:33,500 --> 00:32:35,500
He died during the game
866
00:32:35,500 --> 00:32:37,500
When somebody hit him in the head with a ball
867
00:32:37,500 --> 00:32:39,500
Yes, he was
868
00:32:39,500 --> 00:32:41,500
Oh no, you think
869
00:32:41,500 --> 00:32:45,500
Yes, Ray Chapman the Cleveland shortstop, I'm sorry
870
00:32:45,500 --> 00:32:47,500
He was a shortstop
871
00:32:47,500 --> 00:32:51,500
He cried to the plate while he was at bat
872
00:32:51,500 --> 00:32:55,500
And a rising fastball broke in on Ray
873
00:32:55,500 --> 00:32:57,500
Who caught him at the rate?
874
00:32:57,500 --> 00:33:01,500
Well ladies and gentlemen, the greatest new talent in the Yankee history
875
00:33:01,500 --> 00:33:05,500
Young Ray Chapman coming in the swing of the bat
876
00:33:05,500 --> 00:33:09,500
Coming in the step into the old boxerino
877
00:33:09,500 --> 00:33:11,500
Oh, Ray's using his signature
878
00:33:11,500 --> 00:33:15,500
Don't mess with me, I like to be right on top of the plate
879
00:33:15,500 --> 00:33:17,500
Oh, he's going to win
880
00:33:17,500 --> 00:33:21,500
Call me is was the Yankee picture
881
00:33:21,500 --> 00:33:23,500
Oh, call me
882
00:33:23,500 --> 00:33:25,500
Ladies and gentlemen, the Bronx Mama
883
00:33:25,500 --> 00:33:27,500
Call Hayes
884
00:33:27,500 --> 00:33:29,500
You can tell he's been drinking all night
885
00:33:29,500 --> 00:33:31,500
You can barely stand
886
00:33:31,500 --> 00:33:33,500
And that's how you get the best study as a curveball
887
00:33:33,500 --> 00:33:37,500
And your fastball, ladies and gentlemen, speaking of a fastball
888
00:33:37,500 --> 00:33:41,500
He's going to throw a fastball right down the middle
889
00:33:41,500 --> 00:33:45,500
Nope, a little inside, a little hide
890
00:33:45,500 --> 00:33:49,500
Looks like Chapman takes one on the chin
891
00:33:49,500 --> 00:33:51,500
For the old Yankee retos
892
00:33:51,500 --> 00:33:55,500
So Bange was exonerated of blame
893
00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:59,500
And he said Chapman was one of the hardest players to pitch to
894
00:33:59,500 --> 00:34:05,500
He was the hardest pitcher he ever
895
00:34:05,500 --> 00:34:09,500
He's like he's the only one who refused to wear a helmet
896
00:34:09,500 --> 00:34:13,500
So yeah, if you can find that card man, you got several
897
00:34:13,500 --> 00:34:15,500
So it was made in the 70s
898
00:34:15,500 --> 00:34:17,500
It's made in the 70s
899
00:34:17,500 --> 00:34:19,500
But it's about him from the 20s
900
00:34:19,500 --> 00:34:21,500
From the 20s
901
00:34:21,500 --> 00:34:23,500
And it's rare
902
00:34:23,500 --> 00:34:25,500
It's very rare
903
00:34:25,500 --> 00:34:27,500
How much is it worth?
904
00:34:27,500 --> 00:34:29,500
$1,000,000
905
00:34:29,500 --> 00:34:31,500
Really? I'll go look for it if it's...
906
00:34:31,500 --> 00:34:35,500
It doesn't say how much it works
907
00:34:35,500 --> 00:34:39,500
Well, that's Sports, ladies and gentlemen
908
00:34:39,500 --> 00:34:41,500
That's Sports
909
00:34:41,500 --> 00:34:47,500
We're going to take a quick break and we'll be back with more of the BLC Butt Cows
910
00:34:47,500 --> 00:34:51,500
Sports, the Slack Linkin collective podcast
911
00:34:51,500 --> 00:34:55,500
Will return after a word from our sponsors
912
00:34:55,500 --> 00:35:05,500
[Music]
913
00:35:05,500 --> 00:35:31,500
[Music]
914
00:35:31,500 --> 00:35:37,500
Welcome back to that 250 second edition of the BLC podcast
915
00:35:37,500 --> 00:35:39,500
Ladies and gentlemen, it took a quick break
916
00:35:39,500 --> 00:35:41,500
And now we're back
917
00:35:41,500 --> 00:35:43,500
That's how breaks work
918
00:35:43,500 --> 00:35:47,500
So Fred, we were talking the other day
919
00:35:47,500 --> 00:35:51,500
About things that we'd rather do than other things
920
00:35:51,500 --> 00:35:53,500
And that made me think
921
00:35:53,500 --> 00:35:55,500
What we should do is play
922
00:35:55,500 --> 00:35:57,500
What's your rather?
923
00:35:57,500 --> 00:35:59,500
What's your rather?
924
00:35:59,500 --> 00:36:01,500
Fred, yeah, you and Alan both
925
00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:03,500
I want to hear you guys' thing here
926
00:36:03,500 --> 00:36:07,500
Would you rather wake up naked in a forest 5 miles from your house
927
00:36:07,500 --> 00:36:09,500
Or in your underwear at work?
928
00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:11,500
Forrest
929
00:36:11,500 --> 00:36:13,500
5 miles away from your house naked
930
00:36:13,500 --> 00:36:15,500
Is it a straight shot from my house?
931
00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:19,500
It's an aiming straight shot of your walking
932
00:36:19,500 --> 00:36:23,500
Yeah, but like is it forest all the way up to my house?
933
00:36:23,500 --> 00:36:27,500
No, it's a forest 5 miles away from your house
934
00:36:27,500 --> 00:36:31,500
Okay, so I'm walking out of the forest
935
00:36:31,500 --> 00:36:33,500
Yeah, on to the highway
936
00:36:33,500 --> 00:36:35,500
No, but as naked
937
00:36:35,500 --> 00:36:41,500
Or then you don't know what direction your house is in
938
00:36:41,500 --> 00:36:43,500
My house is north
939
00:36:43,500 --> 00:36:45,500
Of what?
940
00:36:45,500 --> 00:36:47,500
In the forest
941
00:36:47,500 --> 00:36:49,500
No, it's not, you don't know that
942
00:36:49,500 --> 00:36:51,500
Well still you got to walk 5 miles north of the forest
943
00:36:51,500 --> 00:36:53,500
Either way, 5 miles Fred
944
00:36:53,500 --> 00:36:55,500
I'm just gonna have fours of my bagel
945
00:36:55,500 --> 00:36:57,500
I got one 5 miles away
946
00:36:57,500 --> 00:36:59,500
But you have to be 5 miles away
947
00:36:59,500 --> 00:37:01,500
Yep, so you're gonna use it
948
00:37:01,500 --> 00:37:03,500
No, I can navigate 5 miles
949
00:37:03,500 --> 00:37:07,500
I don't want to deal with 5 miles of mosquitoes in a forest
950
00:37:07,500 --> 00:37:09,500
On my wiener
951
00:37:09,500 --> 00:37:11,500
No, I'll ever wake up at work with the...
952
00:37:11,500 --> 00:37:13,500
In underwear, dude, in underwear
953
00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:15,500
Like, I way like, oh, I'm just gonna walk
954
00:37:15,500 --> 00:37:17,500
And you're gonna be like, this is not my fault
955
00:37:17,500 --> 00:37:21,500
Somebody's playing a really mean Jogo B
956
00:37:21,500 --> 00:37:23,500
I have a hoodie at work
957
00:37:23,500 --> 00:37:25,500
Check the cameras, I did not walk in here like this
958
00:37:25,500 --> 00:37:27,500
Right, I don't know what happened either
959
00:37:27,500 --> 00:37:31,500
I'm just just confusing you
960
00:37:31,500 --> 00:37:33,500
I just woke up here
961
00:37:33,500 --> 00:37:35,500
The pillow was gone
962
00:37:35,500 --> 00:37:37,500
I'm sewing this place
963
00:37:37,500 --> 00:37:41,500
All right, Fred, would you rather...
964
00:37:41,500 --> 00:37:43,500
I don't think you're gonna like this one
965
00:37:43,500 --> 00:37:45,500
Uh-oh
966
00:37:45,500 --> 00:37:47,500
Walk in on your parents doing it
967
00:37:47,500 --> 00:37:49,500
Oh, yeah
968
00:37:49,500 --> 00:37:51,500
Or have them walk in on you doing it
969
00:37:51,500 --> 00:37:52,500
I'd rather them walk in on me
970
00:37:52,500 --> 00:37:54,500
'Cause you're like
971
00:37:54,500 --> 00:37:56,500
"A"
972
00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:58,500
"What did I do?"
973
00:37:58,500 --> 00:38:00,500
I go, "What's all that?"
974
00:38:00,500 --> 00:38:02,500
"I was going..."
975
00:38:02,500 --> 00:38:04,500
"Walking in on the app is like..."
976
00:38:04,500 --> 00:38:06,500
That would be traumatic
977
00:38:06,500 --> 00:38:08,500
That would be traumatic
978
00:38:08,500 --> 00:38:10,500
I don't think I would like to do that either
979
00:38:10,500 --> 00:38:14,500
Would you rather give up your favorite food forever
980
00:38:14,500 --> 00:38:16,500
Or give up making sweet, sweet love
981
00:38:16,500 --> 00:38:18,500
Oh, I'll give up my food
982
00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:20,500
Oh
983
00:38:20,500 --> 00:38:24,500
Fred's like, "Well, first of all, Fred, what is your favorite food?"
984
00:38:24,500 --> 00:38:26,500
See, that's the question
985
00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:28,500
Sweet love to who
986
00:38:28,500 --> 00:38:30,500
Just a sweet love, very in
987
00:38:30,500 --> 00:38:32,500
Just a period
988
00:38:32,500 --> 00:38:34,500
The ability to make sweet love
989
00:38:34,500 --> 00:38:36,500
So you're gonna cut the dick off
990
00:38:36,500 --> 00:38:38,500
No, no, no, no, just give up
991
00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:40,500
Just give up the ability to make sweet love
992
00:38:40,500 --> 00:38:42,500
You just don't...
993
00:38:42,500 --> 00:38:44,500
I can't get along with one
994
00:38:44,500 --> 00:38:50,500
You don't care about it, no, you know, it's not that you want, you don't want to anymore
995
00:38:50,500 --> 00:38:52,500
You do want to, but you can
996
00:38:52,500 --> 00:38:54,500
Well, you know, just a...
997
00:38:54,500 --> 00:38:56,500
I suppose to want my favorite food
998
00:38:56,500 --> 00:38:58,500
I don't care about my favorite food, I can't give up my food
999
00:38:58,500 --> 00:39:00,500
Yeah, I can't give up sweet love
1000
00:39:00,500 --> 00:39:02,500
Yeah, you will sweet love
1001
00:39:02,500 --> 00:39:06,500
I can't not make love
1002
00:39:06,500 --> 00:39:08,500
I cannot do that
1003
00:39:08,500 --> 00:39:10,500
So let me think, let me
1004
00:39:10,500 --> 00:39:14,500
Can I have like, angrily sex?
1005
00:39:14,500 --> 00:39:16,500
No, you can't have any of them
1006
00:39:16,500 --> 00:39:18,500
You said sweet love
1007
00:39:18,500 --> 00:39:20,500
Well, that's sweet love
1008
00:39:20,500 --> 00:39:22,500
I said that because I was trying to keep it PG
1009
00:39:22,500 --> 00:39:24,500
And then this happened
1010
00:39:24,500 --> 00:39:26,500
I was trying to remember
1011
00:39:26,500 --> 00:39:28,500
If we talked about children in the beginning of this episode
1012
00:39:28,500 --> 00:39:32,500
Yeah, but isn't sweet love grudge fucking anyway?
1013
00:39:32,500 --> 00:39:34,500
Oh my god, what is this episode?
1014
00:39:34,500 --> 00:39:36,500
Sweet love is like
1015
00:39:36,500 --> 00:39:38,500
Showtime
1016
00:39:38,500 --> 00:39:40,500
At the Apollo
1017
00:39:40,500 --> 00:39:42,500
That's a manual
1018
00:39:42,500 --> 00:39:44,500
It's a manual
1019
00:39:44,500 --> 00:39:46,500
It was so big of a place
1020
00:39:46,500 --> 00:39:48,500
Yeah, manual 8 or whatever
1021
00:39:48,500 --> 00:39:50,500
Young lady chatteling
1022
00:39:50,500 --> 00:39:52,500
Made sweet love
1023
00:39:52,500 --> 00:39:54,500
Right, that's not what exactly
1024
00:39:54,500 --> 00:39:56,500
Well Fred, don't look at this
1025
00:39:56,500 --> 00:40:00,500
In other words, would you rather give up your food or 60 times
1026
00:40:00,500 --> 00:40:02,500
I just want to know what your favorite food is
1027
00:40:02,500 --> 00:40:04,500
So I can make it for you next time I see
1028
00:40:04,500 --> 00:40:06,500
Oh man, I'm gonna have...
1029
00:40:06,500 --> 00:40:08,500
I can't even remember what it is
1030
00:40:08,500 --> 00:40:10,500
Make a...
1031
00:40:10,500 --> 00:40:12,500
I'll tell you what
1032
00:40:12,500 --> 00:40:14,500
I have an idea
1033
00:40:14,500 --> 00:40:16,500
If you can make it good Italian wedding soup
1034
00:40:16,500 --> 00:40:18,500
Okay
1035
00:40:18,500 --> 00:40:20,500
I'll make that for you Fred
1036
00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:22,500
That's not your favorite
1037
00:40:22,500 --> 00:40:24,500
That's something I don't get a lot
1038
00:40:24,500 --> 00:40:26,500
Because not a lot
1039
00:40:26,500 --> 00:40:28,500
Would you give up
1040
00:40:28,500 --> 00:40:30,500
Italian wedding soup
1041
00:40:30,500 --> 00:40:32,500
To never be able
1042
00:40:32,500 --> 00:40:34,500
To jerk it again
1043
00:40:34,500 --> 00:40:34,500
Can I fuck the soup?
1044
00:40:34,500 --> 00:40:36,500
That's between you and the soup
1045
00:40:36,500 --> 00:40:38,500
Whatever happens to the soup is on you
1046
00:40:38,500 --> 00:40:40,500
But you don't get more soup till you eat the soup
1047
00:40:40,500 --> 00:40:42,500
If you fuck it, you gotta eat it
1048
00:40:42,500 --> 00:40:44,500
You gotta eat it
1049
00:40:44,500 --> 00:40:46,500
I mean
1050
00:40:46,500 --> 00:40:48,500
The rules of the rules
1051
00:40:48,500 --> 00:40:50,500
We only make one bowl of soup
1052
00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:52,500
We only have one bowl
1053
00:40:52,500 --> 00:40:54,500
So, all right Fred
1054
00:40:54,500 --> 00:40:56,500
Would you...
1055
00:40:56,500 --> 00:40:58,500
Would you rather get a haircut...
1056
00:40:58,500 --> 00:41:00,500
Never get a haircut again
1057
00:41:00,500 --> 00:41:02,500
Or never shave again
1058
00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:04,500
It only amounted to me
1059
00:41:04,500 --> 00:41:06,500
I would rather never get a haircut again than never shave again
1060
00:41:06,500 --> 00:41:08,500
I...
1061
00:41:08,500 --> 00:41:10,500
So...
1062
00:41:10,500 --> 00:41:12,500
You hate shaving
1063
00:41:12,500 --> 00:41:14,500
I hate both
1064
00:41:14,500 --> 00:41:16,500
Yeah
1065
00:41:16,500 --> 00:41:18,500
But I don't want...
1066
00:41:18,500 --> 00:41:20,500
This one by me
1067
00:41:20,500 --> 00:41:22,500
Parker's...
1068
00:41:22,500 --> 00:41:24,500
He didn't have a beard when we started this show
1069
00:41:24,500 --> 00:41:26,500
I know, it's already grown
1070
00:41:26,500 --> 00:41:28,500
It has grown in since we started this show
1071
00:41:28,500 --> 00:41:30,500
It has grown in since we started
1072
00:41:30,500 --> 00:41:32,500
It grows constantly
1073
00:41:32,500 --> 00:41:36,500
That is insane how fast-bears grow
1074
00:41:36,500 --> 00:41:38,500
Like...
1075
00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:40,500
Why is that?
1076
00:41:40,500 --> 00:41:42,500
Because they're damn sexy
1077
00:41:42,500 --> 00:41:44,500
I mean, I don't grow with face-to-face hair
1078
00:41:44,500 --> 00:41:46,500
You see the face-to-face hair like...
1079
00:41:46,500 --> 00:41:48,500
I know, I have my father the most ability to grow
1080
00:41:48,500 --> 00:41:52,500
I take trimmers to my face like every two weeks
1081
00:41:52,500 --> 00:41:54,500
Can you grow a beard?
1082
00:41:54,500 --> 00:41:56,500
No, like this is it
1083
00:41:56,500 --> 00:41:58,500
Oh, you grow really
1084
00:41:58,500 --> 00:42:00,500
Yeah, this is it
1085
00:42:00,500 --> 00:42:02,500
I can't get nothing on this
1086
00:42:02,500 --> 00:42:04,500
And that makes me jealous
1087
00:42:04,500 --> 00:42:06,500
But everybody is like
1088
00:42:06,500 --> 00:42:08,500
No
1089
00:42:08,500 --> 00:42:10,500
Oh, damn
1090
00:42:10,500 --> 00:42:12,500
I'm so fucking lucky
1091
00:42:12,500 --> 00:42:14,500
Yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm gonna...
1092
00:42:14,500 --> 00:42:16,500
I'm gonna be fucking beard
1093
00:42:16,500 --> 00:42:18,500
Yeah, I'm gonna be fucking beard
1094
00:42:18,500 --> 00:42:20,500
Dude, you really?
1095
00:42:20,500 --> 00:42:22,500
I'm gonna be fucking beard
1096
00:42:22,500 --> 00:42:24,500
I'm gonna be fucking beard
1097
00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:26,500
Because
1098
00:42:26,500 --> 00:42:28,500
If you once it gets to a certain length
1099
00:42:28,500 --> 00:42:30,500
Yeah
1100
00:42:30,500 --> 00:42:32,500
It's so fucking annoying
1101
00:42:32,500 --> 00:42:34,500
Like it's itchy
1102
00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:36,500
And like, oh, it hurts
1103
00:42:36,500 --> 00:42:38,500
And like it just...
1104
00:42:38,500 --> 00:42:40,500
It's gross feeling
1105
00:42:40,500 --> 00:42:42,500
But this is the way I do it, you say it too
1106
00:42:42,500 --> 00:42:44,500
Oh, I feel so good now
1107
00:42:44,500 --> 00:42:46,500
I don't know
1108
00:42:46,500 --> 00:42:48,500
It feels like heaven
1109
00:42:48,500 --> 00:42:50,500
Like when I say my...
1110
00:42:50,500 --> 00:42:52,500
My dick beard
1111
00:42:52,500 --> 00:42:54,500
Like, yeah
1112
00:42:54,500 --> 00:42:56,500
It's gonna be 10 minutes of screw
1113
00:42:56,500 --> 00:42:58,500
I wanna be...
1114
00:42:58,500 --> 00:43:00,500
I want that to be the name
1115
00:43:00,500 --> 00:43:02,500
When I say my dick beard
1116
00:43:02,500 --> 00:43:04,500
Like that's it gets itchy
1117
00:43:04,500 --> 00:43:06,500
Like, oh my god, don't let me be sweating
1118
00:43:06,500 --> 00:43:08,500
Yeah, I'm gonna put powder on it
1119
00:43:08,500 --> 00:43:10,500
I don't put a powder on it, man
1120
00:43:10,500 --> 00:43:12,500
Yeah, you gotta put powder on your teeth
1121
00:43:12,500 --> 00:43:14,500
Yeah, the one time
1122
00:43:14,500 --> 00:43:16,500
I tried to put... I have to say it more than put a...
1123
00:43:16,500 --> 00:43:18,500
No!
1124
00:43:18,500 --> 00:43:20,500
I thought...
1125
00:43:20,500 --> 00:43:22,500
Okay, so...
1126
00:43:22,500 --> 00:43:24,500
You put that same...
1127
00:43:24,500 --> 00:43:26,500
You got to put some powder on it
1128
00:43:26,500 --> 00:43:28,500
You don't put it on that
1129
00:43:28,500 --> 00:43:30,500
Would you rather, Fred, be unable to use...
1130
00:43:30,500 --> 00:43:34,500
Okay, no, would you rather erase your own memories
1131
00:43:34,500 --> 00:43:38,500
Or erase someone else's memories of you
1132
00:43:38,500 --> 00:43:40,500
Oh, you want me to spot a man in the world
1133
00:43:40,500 --> 00:43:42,500
I don't know what that means, but yes
1134
00:43:42,500 --> 00:43:44,500
Yeah, that's what Peter did
1135
00:43:44,500 --> 00:43:46,500
He's right there by the street, he's spot a man
1136
00:43:46,500 --> 00:43:48,500
Why did he do that?
1137
00:43:48,500 --> 00:43:50,500
You can take the ones he loves
1138
00:43:50,500 --> 00:43:52,500
How did he do it?
1139
00:43:52,500 --> 00:43:54,500
Dr. Strange, the number of the box casts a spell
1140
00:43:54,500 --> 00:43:56,500
Nope
1141
00:43:56,500 --> 00:43:58,500
Dr. Strange casts a spell
1142
00:43:58,500 --> 00:44:00,500
He said, they're coming in
1143
00:44:00,500 --> 00:44:02,500
And I can't stop them
1144
00:44:02,500 --> 00:44:06,500
Gotcha, so, well, Fred, what would you rather do?
1145
00:44:06,500 --> 00:44:08,500
Erase yourself
1146
00:44:08,500 --> 00:44:10,500
Erase your own memories
1147
00:44:10,500 --> 00:44:12,500
Or erase someone else's memories of you
1148
00:44:12,500 --> 00:44:14,500
No, I got good memories, man
1149
00:44:14,500 --> 00:44:16,500
See, that's the thing, I really want to erase
1150
00:44:16,500 --> 00:44:18,500
Everyone...
1151
00:44:18,500 --> 00:44:20,500
It says someone else's memories
1152
00:44:20,500 --> 00:44:22,500
I guess someone else's memories
1153
00:44:22,500 --> 00:44:24,500
I'm gonna say someone that's important
1154
00:44:24,500 --> 00:44:26,500
No, Fred...
1155
00:44:26,500 --> 00:44:28,500
No, I'm gonna say somebody
1156
00:44:28,500 --> 00:44:30,500
The Marista at Starbucks that I was like, can I get your memories?
1157
00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:32,500
Your memory is erased
1158
00:44:32,500 --> 00:44:34,500
Your kids...
1159
00:44:34,500 --> 00:44:36,500
Your kids' memories of you
1160
00:44:36,500 --> 00:44:38,500
Why?
1161
00:44:38,500 --> 00:44:40,500
Because that's the whole point of this
1162
00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:42,500
Why would you...?
1163
00:44:42,500 --> 00:44:44,500
Would you rather be like, "No, you would you rather chocolate or vanilla?"
1164
00:44:44,500 --> 00:44:46,500
No, I'm just saying, I'm trying to...
1165
00:44:46,500 --> 00:44:48,500
You know how I break it down, man
1166
00:44:48,500 --> 00:44:50,500
I know, I know you just break it down
1167
00:44:50,500 --> 00:44:52,500
Love this game, you know what I'm saying?
1168
00:44:52,500 --> 00:44:54,500
I know, good, because we have a lot more
1169
00:44:54,500 --> 00:44:56,500
We're breaking it down, we're breaking it down
1170
00:44:56,500 --> 00:44:58,500
You'd rather lose your memory or your kids'
1171
00:44:58,500 --> 00:45:00,500
You'd rather lose your memory or your kids'
1172
00:45:00,500 --> 00:45:02,500
Yeah, yeah
1173
00:45:02,500 --> 00:45:04,500
Oh, would I rather do that?
1174
00:45:04,500 --> 00:45:06,500
Yeah, no, yeah, I'd rather lose...
1175
00:45:06,500 --> 00:45:08,500
Yeah, I'd rather lose your own memories
1176
00:45:08,500 --> 00:45:10,500
Yeah
1177
00:45:10,500 --> 00:45:12,500
Or erase someone else's memories of you
1178
00:45:12,500 --> 00:45:14,500
Or erase certain memories that my kids were...
1179
00:45:14,500 --> 00:45:16,500
No
1180
00:45:16,500 --> 00:45:18,500
It's all or none
1181
00:45:18,500 --> 00:45:20,500
One time you saw me in the car
1182
00:45:20,500 --> 00:45:22,500
You didn't get it from yet now
1183
00:45:22,500 --> 00:45:24,500
See, I don't know, man
1184
00:45:24,500 --> 00:45:26,500
Because that would be weird too
1185
00:45:26,500 --> 00:45:28,500
Because if you erase your own memories
1186
00:45:28,500 --> 00:45:30,500
Yeah
1187
00:45:30,500 --> 00:45:32,500
How are you gonna remember those your kids?
1188
00:45:32,500 --> 00:45:34,500
That's just Alzheimer's, man
1189
00:45:34,500 --> 00:45:36,500
I mean, dad, blah blah blah
1190
00:45:36,500 --> 00:45:38,500
And you'll be like, "Who are you, dude?"
1191
00:45:38,500 --> 00:45:40,500
I don't know Alzheimer's, but...
1192
00:45:40,500 --> 00:45:42,500
I don't know if you're in the field
1193
00:45:42,500 --> 00:45:44,500
Five miles from where my Alzheimer's is being I'm bug naked
1194
00:45:44,500 --> 00:45:46,500
I don't remember any of this
1195
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:48,500
Fuck it naked
1196
00:45:48,500 --> 00:45:54,500
But yeah, like, I don't know, yeah
1197
00:45:54,500 --> 00:45:56,500
That's just like...
1198
00:45:56,500 --> 00:45:58,500
We're racing y'all a bit with my Alzheimer's
1199
00:45:58,500 --> 00:46:00,500
Yeah, I mean, to an extent, you know
1200
00:46:00,500 --> 00:46:02,500
All right, well, would you rather, Fred?
1201
00:46:02,500 --> 00:46:03,500
Yeah, but I'm rather fun
1202
00:46:03,500 --> 00:46:04,500
This is a good one, yeah
1203
00:46:04,500 --> 00:46:06,500
This is a good one for you right here
1204
00:46:06,500 --> 00:46:08,500
I'm Fred, I'm Fred
1205
00:46:08,500 --> 00:46:10,500
I'm Fred or I'm Fred
1206
00:46:10,500 --> 00:46:12,500
You're out there?
1207
00:46:12,500 --> 00:46:14,500
Yeah, just naked
1208
00:46:14,500 --> 00:46:16,500
Alan's just inherited a white baby
1209
00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:18,500
So... I don't know if that adds to it or...
1210
00:46:18,500 --> 00:46:20,500
You're dead with my ass, he stole that baby
1211
00:46:20,500 --> 00:46:22,500
Yeah, that's your recording
1212
00:46:22,500 --> 00:46:24,500
Oh, that white baby
1213
00:46:24,500 --> 00:46:30,500
Out of Fred, would you rather give up air conditioning and heating for the rest of your life?
1214
00:46:30,500 --> 00:46:32,500
Or give up the internet for the rest of your life?
1215
00:46:32,500 --> 00:46:34,500
I am 100% the internet
1216
00:46:34,500 --> 00:46:36,500
Fuck the internet
1217
00:46:36,500 --> 00:46:40,500
His podcast, fuck everything, I need AC
1218
00:46:40,500 --> 00:46:42,500
I got Situ...
1219
00:46:42,500 --> 00:46:44,500
But when my man say in...
1220
00:46:44,500 --> 00:46:46,500
Dalmook...
1221
00:46:46,500 --> 00:46:48,500
He was like...
1222
00:46:48,500 --> 00:46:50,500
Situ... Situ air
1223
00:46:50,500 --> 00:46:52,500
It is like the...
1224
00:46:52,500 --> 00:46:54,500
The biggest city in the world or something like that
1225
00:46:54,500 --> 00:46:56,500
Yeah, it is dude
1226
00:46:56,500 --> 00:46:58,500
Honestly, if I had to give...
1227
00:46:58,500 --> 00:47:02,500
I'd give up Centrelier before I'd give out heat
1228
00:47:04,500 --> 00:47:08,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
1229
00:47:08,500 --> 00:47:10,500
Well, it depends on where you live
1230
00:47:10,500 --> 00:47:14,500
Because if I didn't have heat, I would just move a little south-ther
1231
00:47:14,500 --> 00:47:16,500
Yeah, no, but you don't have a choice
1232
00:47:16,500 --> 00:47:18,500
It's gonna live up a mission
1233
00:47:18,500 --> 00:47:20,500
I can't move, this isn't part of the sense I can't move
1234
00:47:20,500 --> 00:47:22,500
We just...
1235
00:47:22,500 --> 00:47:24,500
But I added the heat, it was Centrelier
1236
00:47:24,500 --> 00:47:26,500
Yeah, yeah, we're Ed things
1237
00:47:26,500 --> 00:47:28,500
Well Fred, in that case...
1238
00:47:28,500 --> 00:47:30,500
Wait, which one did you pick?
1239
00:47:30,500 --> 00:47:32,500
The other one?
1240
00:47:32,500 --> 00:47:34,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
1241
00:47:34,500 --> 00:47:38,500
Alright, well, would you rather Fred and I know you may already have experience with this one?
1242
00:47:38,500 --> 00:47:40,500
Would you rather be the funniest person in every room?
1243
00:47:40,500 --> 00:47:42,500
I'm always funny
1244
00:47:42,500 --> 00:47:44,500
Or the most intelligent person in every room
1245
00:47:44,500 --> 00:47:45,500
Uh...
1246
00:47:45,500 --> 00:47:46,500
Funny, you know
1247
00:47:46,500 --> 00:47:48,500
That one, 'cause funny is yeah, 'cause that was the people just...
1248
00:47:48,500 --> 00:47:50,500
Jerks
1249
00:47:50,500 --> 00:47:52,500
Most of the year they don't have...
1250
00:47:52,500 --> 00:47:54,500
You were there
1251
00:47:54,500 --> 00:47:56,500
Yeah, those smartest I am
1252
00:47:56,500 --> 00:47:58,500
Come on
1253
00:47:58,500 --> 00:48:00,500
Well then I could go to a room where there are really funny people and be like "Ha ha!"
1254
00:48:00,500 --> 00:48:02,500
Yeah, boom
1255
00:48:02,500 --> 00:48:04,500
Gotcha, Dave Chappelle and he would be like "Ha!"
1256
00:48:04,500 --> 00:48:06,500
Yeah, I got ya, I got ya, I got ya
1257
00:48:06,500 --> 00:48:08,500
You got a room in your funny-looking Dave Chappelle
1258
00:48:08,500 --> 00:48:10,500
Yeah
1259
00:48:10,500 --> 00:48:12,500
He's in the corner like, "God damn, okay, get a toe ball!"
1260
00:48:12,500 --> 00:48:16,500
And it'd be like, like, that he's professor
1261
00:48:16,500 --> 00:48:20,500
But then you go to another room where there's no one that's funny
1262
00:48:20,500 --> 00:48:22,500
And you're not funny
1263
00:48:22,500 --> 00:48:26,500
And the problem is though, then you go, "Oh, I'm gonna do a comedy show"
1264
00:48:26,500 --> 00:48:28,500
Yeah
1265
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:28,500
And Dave Chappelle's not there!
1266
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:30,500
So, like, the funniest guy there
1267
00:48:30,500 --> 00:48:32,500
It's like not that funny
1268
00:48:32,500 --> 00:48:34,500
It's not everybody, ya know
1269
00:48:34,500 --> 00:48:36,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
1270
00:48:36,500 --> 00:48:40,500
The funniest guy there is the most intelligent guy there
1271
00:48:40,500 --> 00:48:42,500
It's Carlos Benzio
1272
00:48:42,500 --> 00:48:46,500
Right, because the whole time you're like "Hey, give me a break, Carlos!"
1273
00:48:46,500 --> 00:48:58,500
He's like "Hey, give me a break, Carlos!" He's like "Hey!"
1274
00:48:58,500 --> 00:49:00,500
I remember that
1275
00:49:00,500 --> 00:49:06,500
So, I don't know him, I think money is as well
1276
00:49:06,500 --> 00:49:08,500
But, so, all right, would you rather be the absolute best at something that no one takes seriously?
1277
00:49:08,500 --> 00:49:10,500
Let's say
1278
00:49:10,500 --> 00:49:12,500
Pinkpong
1279
00:49:12,500 --> 00:49:18,500
Let's say that German game where you cut stuff in half and try to cut it in half perfectly
1280
00:49:18,500 --> 00:49:20,500
You know what I'm talking about?
1281
00:49:20,500 --> 00:49:22,500
No
1282
00:49:22,500 --> 00:49:24,500
Oh my gosh, dude, what are you at in life?
1283
00:49:24,500 --> 00:49:26,500
Fred, there's a game show
1284
00:49:26,500 --> 00:49:28,500
It comes on, I believe it's German television
1285
00:49:28,500 --> 00:49:30,500
It's definitely European television
1286
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:34,500
And the purpose of it is you get an item, two people get an item
1287
00:49:34,500 --> 00:49:38,500
And their job is, they take their time
1288
00:49:38,500 --> 00:49:40,500
And they cut it and they're supposed to slice it
1289
00:49:40,500 --> 00:49:42,500
Directly in half
1290
00:49:42,500 --> 00:49:44,500
As close as they possibly get it and then they weigh it
1291
00:49:44,500 --> 00:49:48,500
Or whatever, yeah, I saw one with a pretzel
1292
00:49:48,500 --> 00:49:50,500
Some other stuff
1293
00:49:50,500 --> 00:49:52,500
Some weird papers and shit
1294
00:49:52,500 --> 00:49:54,500
And you have to like
1295
00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:56,500
Do and like so
1296
00:49:56,500 --> 00:49:58,500
They weigh it and whoever's closest
1297
00:49:58,500 --> 00:50:00,500
Is the winner, it's like versus another guy
1298
00:50:00,500 --> 00:50:02,500
Yeah
1299
00:50:02,500 --> 00:50:04,500
So you need to be the best at that
1300
00:50:04,500 --> 00:50:06,500
Be the best at that
1301
00:50:06,500 --> 00:50:08,500
Cut this man in half
1302
00:50:08,500 --> 00:50:14,500
Or be an average guy at something but be well respected at it
1303
00:50:14,500 --> 00:50:16,500
That's what I am now
1304
00:50:16,500 --> 00:50:18,500
Yeah, that's uh, yeah
1305
00:50:18,500 --> 00:50:20,500
So you already made your choice
1306
00:50:20,500 --> 00:50:22,500
Yeah, except I'm not respected
1307
00:50:22,500 --> 00:50:24,500
Trouble
1308
00:50:24,500 --> 00:50:30,500
There you go
1309
00:50:30,500 --> 00:50:32,500
I'm sorry
1310
00:50:32,500 --> 00:50:34,500
But let me know, don't get
1311
00:50:34,500 --> 00:50:36,500
You see my make it
1312
00:50:36,500 --> 00:50:38,500
Let's fuck up
1313
00:50:38,500 --> 00:50:40,500
Yeah, sure
1314
00:50:40,500 --> 00:50:44,500
All right, this one is specifically for Alan
1315
00:50:44,500 --> 00:50:46,500
All right
1316
00:50:46,500 --> 00:50:50,500
All right, would you rather be able to talk your way out of any situation
1317
00:50:50,500 --> 00:50:52,500
Or punch your way out of any situation
1318
00:50:52,500 --> 00:50:58,500
I'd rather punch my way out
1319
00:50:58,500 --> 00:51:00,500
A punch my way out
1320
00:51:00,500 --> 00:51:02,500
Yeah, punch my way out
1321
00:51:02,500 --> 00:51:06,500
And we gotta go, go somebody's your hard-hitting dog's after me
1322
00:51:06,500 --> 00:51:10,500
But we gotta kick him
1323
00:51:10,500 --> 00:51:12,500
We gotta kick him
1324
00:51:12,500 --> 00:51:16,500
But then you have to do it out of every situation
1325
00:51:16,500 --> 00:51:18,500
Do that
1326
00:51:18,500 --> 00:51:20,500
I'm in public
1327
00:51:20,500 --> 00:51:22,500
Yeah
1328
00:51:22,500 --> 00:51:24,500
I'm in public
1329
00:51:24,500 --> 00:51:26,500
I punch the bag all the way out
1330
00:51:26,500 --> 00:51:28,500
I punch the door everywhere you go
1331
00:51:28,500 --> 00:51:30,500
You forgot my files and they got them
1332
00:51:30,500 --> 00:51:32,500
I would punch somebody
1333
00:51:32,500 --> 00:51:40,500
Well, friend, would you rather sneeze a cloud of glitter every time you feel nervous
1334
00:51:40,500 --> 00:51:42,500
Or sweat, warm maple syrup
1335
00:51:42,500 --> 00:51:44,500
Oh
1336
00:51:44,500 --> 00:51:46,500
The cloud of glitter
1337
00:51:46,500 --> 00:51:48,500
I do the glitter because it's not gonna get on me
1338
00:51:48,500 --> 00:51:52,500
Who is the guy that used to have the glitter all the time that would
1339
00:51:52,500 --> 00:51:54,500
What was his name
1340
00:51:54,500 --> 00:51:56,500
Not Donald Parto
1341
00:51:56,500 --> 00:51:58,500
He's talking about the guys
1342
00:51:58,500 --> 00:52:00,500
Yeah
1343
00:52:00,500 --> 00:52:02,500
Ripped torn
1344
00:52:02,500 --> 00:52:04,500
Ripped torn
1345
00:52:04,500 --> 00:52:06,500
Ripped torn
1346
00:52:06,500 --> 00:52:08,500
No, Bruce Vlance was the one with the hair
1347
00:52:08,500 --> 00:52:10,500
Okay
1348
00:52:10,500 --> 00:52:12,500
Ripped torn, there's ripped torn
1349
00:52:12,500 --> 00:52:14,500
Yeah, ripped torn
1350
00:52:14,500 --> 00:52:16,500
And then there's ripped
1351
00:52:16,500 --> 00:52:18,500
There's another rip torn from
1352
00:52:18,500 --> 00:52:20,500
Men in Black
1353
00:52:20,500 --> 00:52:22,500
He has the boss of Men in Black
1354
00:52:22,500 --> 00:52:26,500
His name is rip torn too
1355
00:52:26,500 --> 00:52:28,500
But it is the
1356
00:52:28,500 --> 00:52:30,500
The
1357
00:52:30,500 --> 00:52:32,500
It's really
1358
00:52:32,500 --> 00:52:34,500
Yeah, yeah
1359
00:52:34,500 --> 00:52:36,500
A flame boy
1360
00:52:36,500 --> 00:52:38,500
Was it the one for Men in Black?
1361
00:52:38,500 --> 00:52:40,500
Wasn't either the producer for Gary Sandley show
1362
00:52:40,500 --> 00:52:42,500
Yeah
1363
00:52:42,500 --> 00:52:44,500
Yeah
1364
00:52:44,500 --> 00:52:46,500
I love it
1365
00:52:46,500 --> 00:52:48,500
Yeah, the knife, you put the knife at the door
1366
00:52:48,500 --> 00:52:50,500
Yeah
1367
00:52:50,500 --> 00:52:52,500
Ripped Taylor is who you're thinking about
1368
00:52:52,500 --> 00:52:54,500
I love it
1369
00:52:54,500 --> 00:52:56,500
Girls Elmer Ripped Taylor
1370
00:52:56,500 --> 00:52:58,500
Live till 2019
1371
00:52:58,500 --> 00:53:00,500
Oh my god
1372
00:53:00,500 --> 00:53:02,500
He's like, hi boys
1373
00:53:02,500 --> 00:53:04,500
It's crazy with it, you know what I mean
1374
00:53:04,500 --> 00:53:06,500
Yeah, his, do you know where his show business
1375
00:53:06,500 --> 00:53:08,500
Where it began?
1376
00:53:08,500 --> 00:53:10,500
The biggest
1377
00:53:10,500 --> 00:53:12,500
No
1378
00:53:12,500 --> 00:53:14,500
The US Army
1379
00:53:14,500 --> 00:53:16,500
Yeah
1380
00:53:16,500 --> 00:53:18,500
He started performing stand-up in clubs and restaurants abroad
1381
00:53:18,500 --> 00:53:22,500
So he was probably out there with Bob Holt
1382
00:53:22,500 --> 00:53:24,500
Yeah, Bob Holt
1383
00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:26,500
You know, Bob Holt and George Burst
1384
00:53:26,500 --> 00:53:28,500
Yeah
1385
00:53:28,500 --> 00:53:30,500
So he appeared on the Ed Sullivan show
1386
00:53:30,500 --> 00:53:32,500
About 20 times
1387
00:53:32,500 --> 00:53:34,500
And uh, Sullivan
1388
00:53:34,500 --> 00:53:36,500
We'll forget his names and give me the crying comedian
1389
00:53:36,500 --> 00:53:38,500
Give me the crying guy
1390
00:53:38,500 --> 00:53:40,500
Yeah, so he's on the Jack and Gimli's show
1391
00:53:40,500 --> 00:53:42,500
He's all over the place
1392
00:53:42,500 --> 00:53:44,500
Yeah, rip Taylor
1393
00:53:44,500 --> 00:53:46,500
There he is
1394
00:53:46,500 --> 00:53:48,500
So that's what you would rather be him
1395
00:53:48,500 --> 00:53:50,500
Yeah, I'd rather be rip Taylor
1396
00:53:50,500 --> 00:53:52,500
Because that's disgusting
1397
00:53:52,500 --> 00:53:54,500
That's disgusting
1398
00:53:54,500 --> 00:53:56,500
Cause I'll sweat
1399
00:53:56,500 --> 00:53:58,500
Yeah, I'll sweat right here
1400
00:53:58,500 --> 00:54:00,500
A buddy of you
1401
00:54:00,500 --> 00:54:02,500
You know how many be my mood be around me
1402
00:54:02,500 --> 00:54:04,500
How much will it be so sticky
1403
00:54:04,500 --> 00:54:06,500
Just a sticky all the time
1404
00:54:06,500 --> 00:54:08,500
I would hate it
1405
00:54:08,500 --> 00:54:10,500
All right Fred, would you rather
1406
00:54:10,500 --> 00:54:12,500
Would you rather have skin
1407
00:54:12,500 --> 00:54:14,500
That changes color like a mood ring
1408
00:54:14,500 --> 00:54:16,500
Or hair
1409
00:54:16,500 --> 00:54:18,500
That whispers your secret thoughts out loud
1410
00:54:18,500 --> 00:54:20,500
I'd go be white, I'd go be white
1411
00:54:20,500 --> 00:54:24,500
I'll leave whatever white is on a mood ring
1412
00:54:24,500 --> 00:54:26,500
No, no, I'm gonna be white
1413
00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:28,500
See what you get stopped by the cops
1414
00:54:28,500 --> 00:54:30,500
I'm gonna be yeah
1415
00:54:30,500 --> 00:54:32,500
Brood me too white
1416
00:54:32,500 --> 00:54:34,500
Okay, white on a mood ring
1417
00:54:34,500 --> 00:54:36,500
I'm sorry officer I didn't know that
1418
00:54:36,500 --> 00:54:38,500
That would work for you
1419
00:54:38,500 --> 00:54:40,500
Yeah, you got some big lips for a white guy
1420
00:54:40,500 --> 00:54:42,500
Fred
1421
00:54:42,500 --> 00:54:44,500
The problem is one of us would have to turn into a different color
1422
00:54:44,500 --> 00:54:46,500
Because a white mood ring
1423
00:54:46,500 --> 00:54:48,500
represents feeling confused
1424
00:54:48,500 --> 00:54:50,500
Frustrated, bored, or distracted
1425
00:54:50,500 --> 00:54:52,500
You were all of those things
1426
00:54:52,500 --> 00:54:54,500
That would be it
1427
00:54:54,500 --> 00:54:56,500
Let me it
1428
00:54:56,500 --> 00:54:58,500
You be white
1429
00:54:58,500 --> 00:55:00,500
Fred, how would you...
1430
00:55:00,500 --> 00:55:02,500
What are the mood ring colors?
1431
00:55:02,500 --> 00:55:04,500
Let's see, the colors of the mood ring
1432
00:55:04,500 --> 00:55:06,500
Are blue
1433
00:55:06,500 --> 00:55:08,500
Which is fun, relaxing, happy
1434
00:55:08,500 --> 00:55:10,500
Yeah, green
1435
00:55:10,500 --> 00:55:12,500
Calm and comfortable
1436
00:55:12,500 --> 00:55:14,500
Yellow
1437
00:55:14,500 --> 00:55:16,500
Creative or spaced out
1438
00:55:16,500 --> 00:55:20,500
Red, energetic, passionate or angry
1439
00:55:20,500 --> 00:55:24,500
Orange, eager or adventurous
1440
00:55:24,500 --> 00:55:28,500
Purple, passionate, excited or happy
1441
00:55:28,500 --> 00:55:30,500
So passionate, that's...
1442
00:55:30,500 --> 00:55:32,500
A certain order roused
1443
00:55:32,500 --> 00:55:34,500
They really work
1444
00:55:34,500 --> 00:55:36,500
Yeah, I was fixing to ask, I was fixing to see...
1445
00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:38,500
I have no idea if they actually work
1446
00:55:38,500 --> 00:55:40,500
I think it's just a temperature thing
1447
00:55:40,500 --> 00:55:42,500
Yeah, it's like liqueous paper or something right?
1448
00:55:42,500 --> 00:55:44,500
I don't know, I don't know
1449
00:55:44,500 --> 00:55:46,500
But...
1450
00:55:46,500 --> 00:55:50,500
Yeah, stress is black or overwork
1451
00:55:50,500 --> 00:55:52,500
So yeah, I don't know, I don't think they work
1452
00:55:52,500 --> 00:55:54,500
I think it's just a temperature-based thing
1453
00:55:54,500 --> 00:55:56,500
Yeah
1454
00:55:56,500 --> 00:55:58,500
But who knows? Who fucking knows?
1455
00:55:58,500 --> 00:56:00,500
I know that I would rather have...
1456
00:56:00,500 --> 00:56:02,500
The internet knows
1457
00:56:02,500 --> 00:56:04,500
The internet doesn't know
1458
00:56:04,500 --> 00:56:06,500
How can it prove magic to not be real?
1459
00:56:06,500 --> 00:56:08,500
Yeah, the internet is no
1460
00:56:08,500 --> 00:56:10,500
I've seen in sessions, we think it's real
1461
00:56:10,500 --> 00:56:12,500
So, okay, so you would rather have that
1462
00:56:12,500 --> 00:56:14,500
Than hair that whispers your secret thoughts out loud
1463
00:56:14,500 --> 00:56:16,500
Oh hell no
1464
00:56:16,500 --> 00:56:18,500
No, no
1465
00:56:18,500 --> 00:56:20,500
Imagine that one comboed with where you get
1466
00:56:20,500 --> 00:56:22,500
That you're here ever
1467
00:56:22,500 --> 00:56:24,500
You're in the bank just like
1468
00:56:24,500 --> 00:56:26,500
I jacked up this morning
1469
00:56:26,500 --> 00:56:28,500
And it was good
1470
00:56:28,500 --> 00:56:30,500
I used to both the hands
1471
00:56:30,500 --> 00:56:32,500
That's in here
1472
00:56:32,500 --> 00:56:34,500
We shit, shut up hair
1473
00:56:34,500 --> 00:56:36,500
No
1474
00:56:36,500 --> 00:56:38,500
I farted and shit myself
1475
00:56:38,500 --> 00:56:40,500
I farted and shit myself
1476
00:56:40,500 --> 00:56:42,500
Stop it hair
1477
00:56:42,500 --> 00:56:46,500
Don't tell them
1478
00:56:46,500 --> 00:56:48,500
All right Fred, would you rather...
1479
00:56:48,500 --> 00:56:50,500
I like white guys
1480
00:56:50,500 --> 00:56:58,500
Would you rather have one shoe that stays untied no matter how many times you tie it
1481
00:56:58,500 --> 00:57:00,500
Or have a pebble
1482
00:57:00,500 --> 00:57:02,500
Permanently glued inside that shoe
1483
00:57:02,500 --> 00:57:04,500
Give me that shoe
1484
00:57:04,500 --> 00:57:06,500
Give me that size too
1485
00:57:06,500 --> 00:57:08,500
All right, a few more
1486
00:57:08,500 --> 00:57:10,500
Would you like to smell like a wet onion
1487
00:57:10,500 --> 00:57:12,500
All the time
1488
00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:14,500
Or taste like a dry
1489
00:57:14,500 --> 00:57:18,500
No or taste everything you touch with your bare hands like soup
1490
00:57:18,500 --> 00:57:22,500
Like everything I taste I taste
1491
00:57:22,500 --> 00:57:24,500
Yeah
1492
00:57:24,500 --> 00:57:28,500
Good or bad
1493
00:57:28,500 --> 00:57:30,500
It's bad
1494
00:57:30,500 --> 00:57:32,500
So I'd have the smell like wet eyes
1495
00:57:32,500 --> 00:57:34,500
Fred's like, yeah, smell like wet eyes
1496
00:57:34,500 --> 00:57:36,500
Fred's secrets also like
1497
00:57:36,500 --> 00:57:38,500
We hear it today
1498
00:57:38,500 --> 00:57:40,500
Yeah, all the time
1499
00:57:40,500 --> 00:57:42,500
I touched my weiner in it
1500
00:57:42,500 --> 00:57:44,500
He tasted it
1501
00:57:44,500 --> 00:57:46,500
He tasted like a weiner
1502
00:57:46,500 --> 00:57:50,500
It's like a second bow dig
1503
00:57:50,500 --> 00:57:52,500
Imagine if you
1504
00:57:52,500 --> 00:57:54,500
Fred imagine if you weren't to wipe and you just missed
1505
00:57:54,500 --> 00:57:56,500
Oh, I did
1506
00:57:56,500 --> 00:57:58,500
I'll take a second
1507
00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:00,500
No, no, no, no, no, no
1508
00:58:00,500 --> 00:58:02,500
I've tasted it and I would wear gloves
1509
00:58:02,500 --> 00:58:06,500
Okay, well then you would taste latex all the time
1510
00:58:06,500 --> 00:58:08,500
That's fine, I would wear a tater bag
1511
00:58:08,500 --> 00:58:10,500
That's better, oh tater than you taste potatoes
1512
00:58:10,500 --> 00:58:12,500
Costly, that's how it's a ever thing
1513
00:58:12,500 --> 00:58:14,500
Yeah
1514
00:58:14,500 --> 00:58:16,500
Tater bag
1515
00:58:16,500 --> 00:58:18,500
I've said
1516
00:58:18,500 --> 00:58:20,500
There you go, bring it back
1517
00:58:20,500 --> 00:58:22,500
Fred would you rather, like so we got a few more of these
1518
00:58:22,500 --> 00:58:26,500
Would you rather eat a man-sized bean
1519
00:58:26,500 --> 00:58:28,500
Or a bean-sized man
1520
00:58:28,500 --> 00:58:30,500
24 hours to do it
1521
00:58:30,500 --> 00:58:32,500
Oh
1522
00:58:32,500 --> 00:58:34,500
A bean-sized bean
1523
00:58:34,500 --> 00:58:36,500
Yeah, is it worth?
1524
00:58:36,500 --> 00:58:38,500
So a bean that weighs 170 pounds
1525
00:58:38,500 --> 00:58:40,500
And it's 5'10" just all
1526
00:58:40,500 --> 00:58:42,500
Fuck
1527
00:58:42,500 --> 00:58:44,500
Okay, and a bean
1528
00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:46,500
I'll let you pick that
1529
00:58:46,500 --> 00:58:48,500
We're gonna be with you
1530
00:58:48,500 --> 00:58:50,500
We're gonna be a carbenzo
1531
00:58:50,500 --> 00:58:52,500
Because like
1532
00:58:52,500 --> 00:58:54,500
If it's an edamame
1533
00:58:54,500 --> 00:58:56,500
And I can just pop out
1534
00:58:56,500 --> 00:58:58,500
I can pop out
1535
00:58:58,500 --> 00:59:00,500
The two or three beans in the shell
1536
00:59:00,500 --> 00:59:02,500
I think an edamame is a pea
1537
00:59:02,500 --> 00:59:04,500
No, I'm just sorry
1538
00:59:04,500 --> 00:59:06,500
Red bean, a red bean
1539
00:59:06,500 --> 00:59:08,500
I'd say a black bean
1540
00:59:08,500 --> 00:59:10,500
A black bean
1541
00:59:10,500 --> 00:59:12,500
A black pinto bean
1542
00:59:12,500 --> 00:59:14,500
Pinto bean, yeah
1543
00:59:14,500 --> 00:59:16,500
Or a lime of bean
1544
00:59:16,500 --> 00:59:18,500
Or either bean-sized man
1545
00:59:18,500 --> 00:59:20,500
Or either bean-sized man
1546
00:59:20,500 --> 00:59:22,500
I'd be like
1547
00:59:22,500 --> 00:59:24,500
I eat the man, yeah
1548
00:59:24,500 --> 00:59:26,500
Sorry bro
1549
00:59:26,500 --> 00:59:28,500
Is he dead?
1550
00:59:28,500 --> 00:59:30,500
He is now
1551
00:59:30,500 --> 00:59:32,500
And my hair will be like
1552
00:59:32,500 --> 00:59:34,500
He ate an Iasia man today
1553
00:59:34,500 --> 00:59:36,500
We should say the name of this to Gunty Ahead
1554
00:59:36,500 --> 00:59:38,500
Gunty Ahead, yeah
1555
00:59:38,500 --> 00:59:40,500
Gunty Ahead
1556
00:59:40,500 --> 00:59:42,500
Okay
1557
00:59:42,500 --> 00:59:44,500
Don't eat
1558
00:59:44,500 --> 00:59:48,500
You should've eaten a bans of beans
1559
00:59:48,500 --> 00:59:50,500
How could you eat 170 pounds of bean
1560
00:59:50,500 --> 00:59:52,500
Yeah, that is crazy
1561
00:59:52,500 --> 00:59:54,500
So many parts
1562
00:59:54,500 --> 00:59:56,500
Imagine a glitter
1563
00:59:56,500 --> 01:00:00,500
How about Fred, Gunty Ahead
1564
01:00:00,500 --> 01:00:02,500
Yeah, that does more exciting
1565
01:00:02,500 --> 01:00:04,500
Have a, Gunty Ahead Fred
1566
01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:06,500
Have a backpack
1567
01:00:06,500 --> 01:00:08,500
That's forever full of random rubber ducks
1568
01:00:08,500 --> 01:00:10,500
Or a pocket
1569
01:00:10,500 --> 01:00:14,500
A backpack full of random rubber ducks
1570
01:00:14,500 --> 01:00:16,500
Or a pocket
1571
01:00:16,500 --> 01:00:18,500
That constantly hums the theme song
1572
01:00:18,500 --> 01:00:20,500
To a TV show you hate
1573
01:00:20,500 --> 01:00:22,500
So, Frazier
1574
01:00:22,500 --> 01:00:24,500
Oh baby, I hear of a blues
1575
01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:26,500
Oh, that's a crap
1576
01:00:26,500 --> 01:00:28,500
All the time, your pocket
1577
01:00:28,500 --> 01:00:30,500
I'm gonna go with the ducks
1578
01:00:30,500 --> 01:00:32,500
I'm gonna go with the ducks
1579
01:00:32,500 --> 01:00:34,500
I'm gonna go with the ducks
1580
01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:36,500
I'm gonna go with the ducks
1581
01:00:36,500 --> 01:00:38,500
Also, I don't have to carry a backpack all the time
1582
01:00:38,500 --> 01:00:40,500
I can just leave it at home
1583
01:00:40,500 --> 01:00:42,500
Yeah
1584
01:00:42,500 --> 01:00:44,500
Yeah, you could go to Jeep events
1585
01:00:44,500 --> 01:00:46,500
And sell all the ducks
1586
01:00:46,500 --> 01:00:48,500
Any bag you get, so in other words
1587
01:00:48,500 --> 01:00:50,500
If you pick up a backpack
1588
01:00:50,500 --> 01:00:52,500
When you open it, it's gonna be big
1589
01:00:52,500 --> 01:00:54,500
I make myself like a scavenger hunt
1590
01:00:54,500 --> 01:00:56,500
For Jeep people to be like, where's the cat
1591
01:00:56,500 --> 01:00:58,500
Yeah, we find people
1592
01:00:58,500 --> 01:01:00,500
Find the backpack duck man
1593
01:01:00,500 --> 01:01:02,500
Alright, so
1594
01:01:02,500 --> 01:01:04,500
Accident, oh, Gunty Ahead
1595
01:01:04,500 --> 01:01:06,500
Hmm
1596
01:01:06,500 --> 01:01:08,500
Would you rather start calling every single person
1597
01:01:08,500 --> 01:01:10,500
You meet champ
1598
01:01:10,500 --> 01:01:12,500
Or sweetheart in a loud voice
1599
01:01:12,500 --> 01:01:14,500
Oh, is he the one?
1600
01:01:14,500 --> 01:01:16,500
Yeah
1601
01:01:16,500 --> 01:01:18,500
Call everybody champ
1602
01:01:18,500 --> 01:01:20,500
Or everybody sweetheart
1603
01:01:20,500 --> 01:01:22,500
I'm gonna champ
1604
01:01:22,500 --> 01:01:24,500
Yeah, champ
1605
01:01:24,500 --> 01:01:26,500
Hey, that champ
1606
01:01:26,500 --> 01:01:28,500
Cause that's a lot better
1607
01:01:28,500 --> 01:01:30,500
If you call a lady a champ
1608
01:01:30,500 --> 01:01:32,500
And so, okay, if you call a dude sweetheart
1609
01:01:32,500 --> 01:01:34,500
You're gonna get bunched
1610
01:01:34,500 --> 01:01:36,500
Yeah, I'm gonna punch his way
1611
01:01:36,500 --> 01:01:38,500
Alright, well
1612
01:01:38,500 --> 01:01:42,500
This one just doesn't even make sense
1613
01:01:42,500 --> 01:01:44,500
Anyway, Fred, Gunty Ahead
1614
01:01:44,500 --> 01:01:46,500
Hmm
1615
01:01:46,500 --> 01:01:48,500
Would you rather live in a world
1616
01:01:48,500 --> 01:01:50,500
Where dogs control the internet
1617
01:01:50,500 --> 01:01:52,500
Or a world where cats
1618
01:01:52,500 --> 01:01:54,500
Right all the traffic laws
1619
01:01:54,500 --> 01:01:56,500
What the fuck is that
1620
01:01:56,500 --> 01:02:00,500
(Laughter)
1621
01:02:00,500 --> 01:02:02,500
Dogs control the internet
1622
01:02:02,500 --> 01:02:04,500
All the traffic laws
1623
01:02:04,500 --> 01:02:06,500
Right all the traffic laws
1624
01:02:06,500 --> 01:02:10,500
All the porn juicy would be doggy style
1625
01:02:10,500 --> 01:02:12,500
(Laughter)
1626
01:02:12,500 --> 01:02:14,500
That's all they would say
1627
01:02:14,500 --> 01:02:16,500
I think if dogs control the internet it would be awesome
1628
01:02:16,500 --> 01:02:18,500
Yeah, yeah
1629
01:02:18,500 --> 01:02:20,500
It would be pictures of squirrels
1630
01:02:20,500 --> 01:02:22,500
Squirrels
1631
01:02:22,500 --> 01:02:24,500
Squirrels
1632
01:02:24,500 --> 01:02:26,500
And looking nuts
1633
01:02:26,500 --> 01:02:28,500
Yeah
1634
01:02:28,500 --> 01:02:30,500
I'll go with
1635
01:02:30,500 --> 01:02:32,500
Terrible
1636
01:02:32,500 --> 01:02:34,500
Yeah, dogs have chicken control
1637
01:02:34,500 --> 01:02:36,500
Yeah, I'm taking it
1638
01:02:36,500 --> 01:02:38,500
I'm taking it
1639
01:02:38,500 --> 01:02:40,500
How many? Well, Gunty Ahead
1640
01:02:40,500 --> 01:02:42,500
Hmm
1641
01:02:42,500 --> 01:02:44,500
How many toes
1642
01:02:44,500 --> 01:02:46,500
Are you willing to cut off with a bolt cutter
1643
01:02:46,500 --> 01:02:48,500
Or $500,000 each
1644
01:02:48,500 --> 01:02:50,500
Oh, size
1645
01:02:50,500 --> 01:02:54,500
Shit, I cut two of them and I got a million bucks
1646
01:02:54,500 --> 01:02:56,500
Yeah, yeah, I'm going to
1647
01:02:56,500 --> 01:02:58,500
You have to cut them off yourself
1648
01:02:58,500 --> 01:03:00,500
Yeah, you have to cut them off yourself
1649
01:03:00,500 --> 01:03:02,500
Yeah, do I get any anesthesia?
1650
01:03:02,500 --> 01:03:04,500
I don't know, you just have to do it
1651
01:03:04,500 --> 01:03:06,500
For me
1652
01:03:06,500 --> 01:03:08,500
For me, I cut two of them
1653
01:03:08,500 --> 01:03:10,500
Yeah, I cut both my pinky toes off
1654
01:03:10,500 --> 01:03:12,500
I wouldn't do the pinky, I do the middle ones
1655
01:03:12,500 --> 01:03:14,500
But yeah
1656
01:03:14,500 --> 01:03:16,500
Oh, I do the worst
1657
01:03:16,500 --> 01:03:18,500
Every one of them was worse than hurting me
1658
01:03:18,500 --> 01:03:20,500
I think he's getting a f*cking scared of the intents
1659
01:03:20,500 --> 01:03:22,500
No, no, no
1660
01:03:22,500 --> 01:03:24,500
I do the middle one
1661
01:03:24,500 --> 01:03:26,500
No, because that's been playing NFL plays
1662
01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:28,500
Cutting the pinky toes off
1663
01:03:28,500 --> 01:03:30,500
Like
1664
01:03:30,500 --> 01:03:32,500
Yeah, well, Dion Sanders had his removed
1665
01:03:32,500 --> 01:03:34,500
Oh, yeah, three of them removed
1666
01:03:34,500 --> 01:03:36,500
Oh, yeah, three of them removed
1667
01:03:36,500 --> 01:03:38,500
And that's not any of these really
1668
01:03:38,500 --> 01:03:40,500
And they clowned it
1669
01:03:40,500 --> 01:03:42,500
They clowned it too, man, they were like, look at the feet
1670
01:03:42,500 --> 01:03:44,500
Yeah
1671
01:03:44,500 --> 01:03:46,500
He's just, whatever, they kicker, they didn't have any
1672
01:03:46,500 --> 01:03:48,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
1673
01:03:48,500 --> 01:03:50,500
That's not the front
1674
01:03:50,500 --> 01:03:52,500
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
1675
01:03:52,500 --> 01:03:54,500
All right, well, Fred
1676
01:03:54,500 --> 01:03:56,500
Do you have a Marshall Fox hands?
1677
01:03:56,500 --> 01:03:58,500
Yeah, weird, yeah
1678
01:03:58,500 --> 01:04:00,500
All right, Fred, for football's coming back guys
1679
01:04:00,500 --> 01:04:02,500
Yes
1680
01:04:02,500 --> 01:04:04,500
For a prize of five million, go to your head
1681
01:04:04,500 --> 01:04:06,500
For five million dollars
1682
01:04:06,500 --> 01:04:10,500
Would you rather survive two weeks in the Jurassic period
1683
01:04:10,500 --> 01:04:14,500
Or three years on the streets
1684
01:04:14,500 --> 01:04:16,500
Five million dollars
1685
01:04:16,500 --> 01:04:18,500
Do what?
1686
01:04:18,500 --> 01:04:20,500
Do what?
1687
01:04:20,500 --> 01:04:22,500
Live, just live
1688
01:04:22,500 --> 01:04:24,500
I do the streets
1689
01:04:24,500 --> 01:04:26,500
Three years of the street
1690
01:04:26,500 --> 01:04:28,500
Yeah, I do the streets
1691
01:04:28,500 --> 01:04:30,500
Three years of homelessness or
1692
01:04:30,500 --> 01:04:32,500
Two weeks in the Jurassic period
1693
01:04:32,500 --> 01:04:34,500
No, wait, no way, I'm gonna do two weeks in the Jurassic period
1694
01:04:34,500 --> 01:04:36,500
I'm gonna do two weeks in the Jurassic period
1695
01:04:36,500 --> 01:04:40,500
Dude, you're talking about 10 foot
1696
01:04:40,500 --> 01:04:42,500
I think I know it's my like a little small cave
1697
01:04:42,500 --> 01:04:44,500
Yeah
1698
01:04:44,500 --> 01:04:46,500
But you don't know what the fuck is in that cave
1699
01:04:46,500 --> 01:04:48,500
Well, that's what I'm saying
1700
01:04:48,500 --> 01:04:50,500
A cave with a back
1701
01:04:50,500 --> 01:04:52,500
Yeah, I'm saying it's like a small cave
1702
01:04:52,500 --> 01:04:54,500
Two weeks in the park
1703
01:04:54,500 --> 01:04:56,500
Yeah, I mean
1704
01:04:56,500 --> 01:04:58,500
Man, you can live in the streets
1705
01:04:58,500 --> 01:05:00,500
You can go to homeless shelter
1706
01:05:00,500 --> 01:05:02,500
You can just hang out
1707
01:05:02,500 --> 01:05:04,500
Three years that is
1708
01:05:04,500 --> 01:05:06,500
I'll be three years in California
1709
01:05:06,500 --> 01:05:08,500
Three years
1710
01:05:08,500 --> 01:05:10,500
Three years
1711
01:05:10,500 --> 01:05:12,500
Two weeks in Jurassic period
1712
01:05:12,500 --> 01:05:14,500
Two weeks, dude
1713
01:05:14,500 --> 01:05:16,500
Two weeks, dude
1714
01:05:16,500 --> 01:05:18,500
There's a reason why their motherfuckers aren't alive now
1715
01:05:18,500 --> 01:05:22,500
But as a reason why they survive, too
1716
01:05:22,500 --> 01:05:24,500
I think I can survive more than a cave, man
1717
01:05:24,500 --> 01:05:26,500
No
1718
01:05:26,500 --> 01:05:28,500
Like one of them looks like 10 hours
1719
01:05:28,500 --> 01:05:30,500
I'd survive hours
1720
01:05:30,500 --> 01:05:32,500
I can't even kill them a ton of them
1721
01:05:32,500 --> 01:05:34,500
Yeah, my luck would be the last two weeks
1722
01:05:34,500 --> 01:05:36,500
It would be the two weeks
1723
01:05:36,500 --> 01:05:38,500
It would be the week before the asteroid hit
1724
01:05:38,500 --> 01:05:40,500
Well, but there's also no
1725
01:05:40,500 --> 01:05:42,500
It would be like that
1726
01:05:42,500 --> 01:05:44,500
You remember that show dinosaurs
1727
01:05:44,500 --> 01:05:46,500
Not the papa or whatever
1728
01:05:46,500 --> 01:05:48,500
Not the papa
1729
01:05:48,500 --> 01:05:50,500
So you remember how it ended, right?
1730
01:05:50,500 --> 01:05:52,500
Yeah, the big bang
1731
01:05:52,500 --> 01:05:54,500
They were like, yeah, the asteroid
1732
01:05:54,500 --> 01:05:56,500
They ended it right
1733
01:05:56,500 --> 01:05:58,500
Yeah
1734
01:05:58,500 --> 01:06:00,500
But there's no guarantee
1735
01:06:00,500 --> 01:06:02,500
It was about bad day for quantum leak
1736
01:06:02,500 --> 01:06:04,500
The hologram
1737
01:06:04,500 --> 01:06:06,500
Sam, what up?
1738
01:06:06,500 --> 01:06:08,500
Sam was the guy
1739
01:06:08,500 --> 01:06:10,500
Who was the half
1740
01:06:10,500 --> 01:06:12,500
How, how, yeah
1741
01:06:12,500 --> 01:06:14,500
How, how, how
1742
01:06:14,500 --> 01:06:16,500
Get me out of here
1743
01:06:16,500 --> 01:06:18,500
I don't want the money
1744
01:06:18,500 --> 01:06:20,500
How
1745
01:06:20,500 --> 01:06:22,500
How
1746
01:06:22,500 --> 01:06:24,500
Hey, Fred
1747
01:06:24,500 --> 01:06:26,500
Would you rather
1748
01:06:26,500 --> 01:06:28,500
Was the last one?
1749
01:06:28,500 --> 01:06:30,500
Last one
1750
01:06:30,500 --> 01:06:32,500
Good to hear
1751
01:06:32,500 --> 01:06:34,500
Yeah, get me ahead
1752
01:06:34,500 --> 01:06:38,500
Would you rather go underwater cave diving with no prior training or experience
1753
01:06:38,500 --> 01:06:40,500
You do have the equipment though
1754
01:06:40,500 --> 01:06:42,500
Or hold on, hold on
1755
01:06:42,500 --> 01:06:46,500
Or eat drink water
1756
01:06:46,500 --> 01:06:50,500
Straight from the bottom of a dumpster and swallow it
1757
01:06:50,500 --> 01:06:52,500
That's what it's gonna taste like
1758
01:06:52,500 --> 01:06:54,500
I would
1759
01:06:54,500 --> 01:06:56,500
God, man
1760
01:06:56,500 --> 01:06:58,500
That's a hard question, dude
1761
01:06:58,500 --> 01:07:00,500
How long have I got to be down to?
1762
01:07:00,500 --> 01:07:02,500
I got to be down to
1763
01:07:02,500 --> 01:07:04,500
I got to be down to
1764
01:07:04,500 --> 01:07:06,500
I got to be down to
1765
01:07:06,500 --> 01:07:08,500
I got to be down to
1766
01:07:08,500 --> 01:07:10,500
I got to be down to
1767
01:07:10,500 --> 01:07:12,500
Because I have the equipment
1768
01:07:12,500 --> 01:07:14,500
Fuck that dude, I'd never be down to
1769
01:07:14,500 --> 01:07:16,500
See this is where you think like
1770
01:07:16,500 --> 01:07:18,500
Oh, yeah
1771
01:07:18,500 --> 01:07:20,500
Great, Parker's tall
1772
01:07:20,500 --> 01:07:22,500
And he's got all this beard
1773
01:07:22,500 --> 01:07:24,500
And all this shit
1774
01:07:24,500 --> 01:07:26,500
And great good for him
1775
01:07:26,500 --> 01:07:28,500
But no, in this situation
1776
01:07:28,500 --> 01:07:30,500
And a cave diving situation
1777
01:07:30,500 --> 01:07:32,500
I am the worst possible person
1778
01:07:32,500 --> 01:07:34,500
I can't live in the regular world
1779
01:07:34,500 --> 01:07:36,500
How am I gonna live in the world of caves
1780
01:07:36,500 --> 01:07:40,500
You don't live down there, you just gotta go down there
1781
01:07:40,500 --> 01:07:42,500
Yeah, how am I gonna do that
1782
01:07:42,500 --> 01:07:44,500
I go down there
1783
01:07:44,500 --> 01:07:46,500
I go down to be down
1784
01:07:46,500 --> 01:07:48,500
You have the equipment to do it
1785
01:07:48,500 --> 01:07:52,500
Do you know how many ropes you would have to climb
1786
01:07:52,500 --> 01:07:54,500
It's under water
1787
01:07:54,500 --> 01:07:56,500
It's under water, and you don't like nothing
1788
01:07:56,500 --> 01:07:58,500
You don't like to go to a school board
1789
01:07:58,500 --> 01:08:00,500
I thought it was like you had to go in a cave
1790
01:08:00,500 --> 01:08:02,500
And there was water in the cave
1791
01:08:02,500 --> 01:08:04,500
No, you said you under water caves
1792
01:08:04,500 --> 01:08:08,500
I don't like caves guys
1793
01:08:08,500 --> 01:08:10,500
I don't like
1794
01:08:10,500 --> 01:08:12,500
I know, if there was one
1795
01:08:12,500 --> 01:08:16,500
One type of thing that I could eliminate from the internet
1796
01:08:16,500 --> 01:08:18,500
Other than like child porn and stuff
1797
01:08:18,500 --> 01:08:20,500
It would be like, you know, the obvious things
1798
01:08:20,500 --> 01:08:24,500
It would be the videos of people doing cave shit
1799
01:08:24,500 --> 01:08:26,500
Where they're like going into the cave
1800
01:08:26,500 --> 01:08:28,500
And they're like, "I might be stuck
1801
01:08:28,500 --> 01:08:30,500
And then you don't like that man?"
1802
01:08:30,500 --> 01:08:32,500
I hate it
1803
01:08:32,500 --> 01:08:34,500
I hate it
1804
01:08:34,500 --> 01:08:36,500
That one? No
1805
01:08:36,500 --> 01:08:38,500
It makes me so sad
1806
01:08:38,500 --> 01:08:40,500
Because I think they're gonna, again, I'm like, they're gonna die
1807
01:08:40,500 --> 01:08:44,500
And then they don't die because they posted the fucking video friend
1808
01:08:44,500 --> 01:08:48,500
So it just doesn't work for me, it's annoying
1809
01:08:48,500 --> 01:08:50,500
All right, well, we didn't die
1810
01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:54,500
And we're gonna post this video probably most of it
1811
01:08:54,500 --> 01:08:56,500
Parker's not a cave man
1812
01:08:56,500 --> 01:08:58,500
I'm not a cave man, I'm a man cave
1813
01:08:58,500 --> 01:09:02,500
So, there you go ladies and gentlemen, we're gonna get out of here
1814
01:09:02,500 --> 01:09:04,500
We will try to do better next week
1815
01:09:04,500 --> 01:09:08,500
Come on, play, smoke cigars inside me, I'm a man cave
1816
01:09:08,500 --> 01:09:12,500
There you go, enjoy the thought of that
1817
01:09:12,500 --> 01:09:14,500
For a whole week, we'll see you next week
1818
01:09:14,500 --> 01:09:16,500
Play for a week, I'm a man cave in my butt
1819
01:09:16,500 --> 01:09:18,500
I'm a man in cave
1820
01:09:18,500 --> 01:09:20,500
We'll see you next week
1821
01:09:20,500 --> 01:09:22,500
Uh, it's gonna be Elsie Bogas
1822
01:09:22,500 --> 01:09:24,500
What?
1823
01:09:24,500 --> 01:09:28,500
We are laughing
1824
01:09:28,500 --> 01:09:30,500
And we are very good friends
1825
01:09:30,500 --> 01:09:34,500
Good vibes, sharing a special moment
1826
01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:50,500
[Music]
1827
01:09:50,500 --> 01:09:54,500
That's it man, game over man, it's game over
1828
01:09:54,500 --> 01:09:58,500
Just hang loose blood, she's gonna catch up on the rebarad manza
1829
01:09:58,500 --> 01:10:08,500
[Music]
1830
01:10:08,500 --> 01:10:10,500
Well, thanks all folks
1831
01:10:10,500 --> 01:10:14,500
I still have Easter, baby
1832
01:10:14,500 --> 01:10:16,500
God damn it
1833
01:10:16,500 --> 01:10:20,500
I don't worry nobody's listening anyway
1834
01:10:20,500 --> 01:10:22,500
As you know, I'm a man of special needs
1835
01:10:22,500 --> 01:10:24,500
Surely you can't be serious
1836
01:10:24,500 --> 01:10:26,500
I am serious and don't call me surely
1837
01:10:26,500 --> 01:10:27,500
for each one.